The Many Horrors of Fanfiction!
by MidnightSakuraBlossom and SYD
Summary: Naruto and Sasuke think they've seen a lot of traumatizing things in their lives, that is, until they discover the horrors of Fanfiction! Their lives will -never- be the same! What will they come across? Slightly AU implied NarutoxSasuke fic. M for...
1. It Begins!

_**Author's Note: Ooookay...I really don't know where this idea came from. XD All I know is that I was playing a Final Fantasy game (not telling which one it was! :P) when this idea just came to mind all of a sudden! O.o**_

_**Heh...but I am kind of glad it did. I quickly turned off the game and pretty much frantically pulled out my laptop to begin typing; because the story idea was SO tempting to do! Look, it might not be one of my best...but I HAD to go through with this idea! After all, it's so interesting to think about what the Naruto characters might think of fanfiction...since fanfiction is full of unspeakable horrors! XD**_

_**I know I have other stories to update. And you know what? I WILL find the time to post new chapters to my other stories still going, AND this one. Believe me, when I'm determined to do something, I try to finish it through and through!**_

_**Anyway, there's various random pairings in here. It's rated M for the content that the characters come across in the fanfictions they check out, and for...well, you'll figure out why it's rated M! Also some strong language at times.**_

_**Some of the fanfiction that characters come across were randomly thought up by me; don't freak out if by some dumb chance they're exactly like other author's fics. -_- If that does happen, it WASN'T intentional.**_

_**OH! And I'd say this is an AU story, but not completely AU; it takes place within the canon plot of course, but it doesn't really follow it much. It's...ugh...I can't explain it. T.T**_

_**Well, I hope this story's fine; any feedback is appreciated, but what I could use is some TRUE constructive criticism; so I can ACTUALLY IMPROVE! :)**_

_**Disclaimer: I wish I owned the anime/manga series, Naruto, and all. But I DON'T; Masashi Kishimoto does, okay?**_

_**[XXXXX]**_

_**The Many Horrors Of Fanfiction!:**_

_**Chapter One: It Begins!**_

There are some very horrifying things in the world. Some things much to horrible to even speak of. When being a shinobi, things can get pretty rough and stunning when lives are put on the line, and witnessing comrades dying. Or even dying a very agonizing and gory death while the enemy watches in pleasure.

However.

There is something much more worse: it's a territory that some never even **dare** to enter. It's a sight that may scar whoever sees it for life. It's something that could leave one forever **traumatized**. It attempts to seduce one with it's attractive bait, but once one makes the chancing move and looks at it...it's all **over**; and the eyes were just stripped of their virginity. But what IS this traumatizing horror?

**Fanfiction**.

Fanfiction; something completely unpredictable and utterly stunning. The lives of shinobi will never be the same after discovering this horror of fanfiction!

However the question is, WHO will be the first to discover the horrors of fanfiction?

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-The Hidden Leaf 3:55 PM-**

"Damn it, Sasuke! What the hell do you have in this suitcase?" Naruto hissed as he struggled to drag a REALLY heavy suitcase over to Sasuke Uchiha's old home. Sasuke was right behind him carrying some of his weapons and rolled his eyes. "I thought you didn't carry ANYTHING with you when you left to go to Orochimaru!"

Although Sasuke had left the village a long time ago, everyone was able to convince him to return back to the village by **torture**: Naruto simply tied him to a chair with the help of Sai, and then they both got Sakura and Ino to transform into really hot bishonen guys and fake a yaoi sex scene (which they were HAPPY to do; because they **loved** yaoi). After Sasuke had suffered through two hours of mindless 'sex' by the 'hot bishonen' guys, he couldn't take it anymore and screamed in agony before mentioning to Naruto and Sai that destroying the Leaf WASN'T worth that torture. He willingly gave up trying to destroy the village and went home with the four.

At first, Naruto was stunned to find out that Sasuke couldn't stand yaoi; all those years...Naruto assumed that the Uchiha was gay! It was Sakura that came up with the idea of using an illusion of yaoi to bring him back, Naruto was against it at first, but went with it anyway.

Still, the fact that Sasuke Uchiha was straight...it was unbelievable! Even as they returned back to the village that same day and were heading to his old home, Naruto **still couldn't** believe that his power-obsessed bastard of a friend was straight. As he took a quick glance back at Sasuke, he noted that he would still refuse to believe that he was straight without pure proof!

"What are you talking about?" Sasuke asked; he wasn't paying attention because he had been trying to get the mental yaoi image that was burned into his mind out.

"I'M TALKING ABOUT THIS FREAKING 100,000 lbs SUITCASE!" Naruto snapped as sweat poured down his body. He grunted and continued to try and drag along the suitcase, all while glaring at Sasuke.

"Oh, that's just my hair products." Sasuke replied as if he was talking about something really dull.

"WHAT?"

"Well, I may be evil...but I can't risk looking like a slob."

Naruto's eyes widened when realization hit him and he facepalmed before ditching the suitcase all together.

"You mean, I've been dragging goddamn _HAIR PRODUCTS_ for over over 13,000 miles?" Naruto yelled in shock as Sasuke shrugged his shoulders.

"Naruto, just shut up. We're here anyway, aren't we?" Sasuke pointed out; literally gesturing to the building.

"...Fine. But you know, I'm going to someday get back at you for making me drag that stuff without even knowing it was that worthless!" Naruto mentioned; furrowing his eyebrows together and then pretty much throwing the suitcase over to Sasuke.

"I have no doubt." Sasuke muttered. He then turned to look at the building and sighed dramatically. It had been a while since he'd seen his old home; and almost forgot how it even looked. "So...that's it."

"Yeah, this is the place. Back when that Pein guy attacked the village, the area, I THINK it was this area, I can't remember anyway, got pretty messed up." Naruto mentioned before looking back at the ground.

"Yeah. And...what happened after that attack anyway?" Sasuke suddenly asked.

"Oh, the village was somehow put back to normal, all the people who got killed were revived, and then me and Iruka-Sensei celebrated the next day by getting a strawberry smoothie!" Naruto replied; smiling as he remembered how delicious strawberry smoothie tasted.

Sasuke just blinked as a "WTF?" expression appeared on his face. It wasn't because he didn't know what smoothies were, it was because he never knew that Naruto or Iruka liked the strawberry flavor; he , himself, hated strawberry...especially the sugary kind.

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Sasuke's Old Home 4:03 PM-**

Naruto grunted and struggled to drag Sasuke's suitcase into the house; he knew that when we was through lugging around his friend's "important" hair products, he would have to go soak in the hot spring and then wring Sasuke's neck!

Really, he didn't know how he ended up being the one who had to drag the damn suitcase; Sasuke just kind of threw it at him after they untied him and he declared that being evil wasn't worth the yaoi torture (and Naruto STILL refused to believe Sasuke was straight even after that).

"Ugh! Finally! Home at LAST!" Naruto pretty much shouted hysterically before crying anime tears and throwing the suitcase behind his back.

And unfortunately for Sasuke, he opened the door and stepped into the house just as Naruto threw the suitcase; and at a sudden speed, the suitcase flew at him and hit him **perfectly **in the crotch.

"Home! I'm so glad-"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

"-It took a really long time!"

"Naruto! Are you even aware of-augh..."

"Home...safe and sound~!

"Naruto...ugh..."

Naruto sighed, unaware of the fact that Sasuke was on the floor in extreme pain, he rubbed his arms and collected himself.

"Well! Now that you're finally back and all..." Naruto cut himself off as he glanced over at Sasuke and flinched as he noticed him. "Of fu-"

"NARUTO!"

Normally, Naruto would have probably ran after something like that happened. He learned from past experiences; he could somehow screw up almost everything he did. And when that happened, running was the best thing to do!

"Now that WASN'T my fault!" Naruto protested as he held his hands up. Sasuke got up a little off the floor and glared at him. And, feeling creeped out, Naruto backed away slowly. "If you weren't so obsessed with your emo look; I wouldn't have had to lug that suitcase, and you wouldn't be in extreme pain on the really dirty floor!"

Sasuke, still in pain, just continued to glare. He would have activated his Sharingan at that point, but he just felt a little too exhausted at that point.

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-10 Minutes Later-**

The pain finally subsiding, Sasuke got up off the floor and gave a nervous Naruto a good punch to the back of his head before angrily kicking the suitcase off to the side. And, still pissed off, he wanted to really torture Naruto in a powerful and agonizing genjutsu.

Somehow afterward, things kind of calmed down. And Naruto and Sasuke sighed as they closely examined the living room; they hadn't noticed the way it looked when they first entered. And it was pretty much safe to say that:

The house looked like **hell**.

"...Wow." Naruto muttered under his breath taking in the sight: from what he noticed, dust was **everywhere**, cobwebs were pretty much from the ceiling to the floor and the doorways, neglected dirty furniture was scattered around the room, and strangely, there was a photo of a 10 year old Itachi on the floor with the glass broken. "Er...it really has been a while, huh Sasuke?"

"It sure does look a lot filthier." Sasuke commented; Naruto looked blank suddenly when he wondered if Sasuke was thinking angsty thoughts or something.

"Sasuke, what are we going to do? You can't live in THIS." Naruto pointed out; gesturing to the wreak of a home that once belonged to Sasuke's parents.

"Tell me something I **don't** know. It looks horrible..." Sasuke mentioned after sighing. "Maybe we can get Tsunade to send someone over here to clean it-"

"No. Granny's such a bitch without her precious sake to keep her world in balance." Naruto replied in a monotone. "She ran out of her huge supply two weeks ago; and it's NOT a good idea to talk to her now until Shizune can import more from other nations!"

"...Okay, that really sucks."

"I know! I hope Sakura never gets that obsessed with alcohol and-"

"If I'm going to return back to the village, I'll need somewhere to live. We are just going to have to clean the entire place ourselves." Sasuke said; tuning out to what Naruto was absentmindedly ranting. After hearing what he just said, however, Naruto stopped ranting and stared in surprise.

"WE?" Naruto hysterically shouted. "It's your home! Or well, it WAS, but...technically it's yours since the entire clan is dead!"

"I know. But you don't understand; I'll need your help." Sasuke pointed out before smirking very slightly; Naruto looked blank when he noticed the smirk, it almost seemed as if he was planning **something**.

"...Er...we're still talking about the HOUSE, right?" Naruto asked warily before stumbling back against a table.

"What did you think I was talking about?"

"N-nothing. Nothing at all..." Naruto mumbled; rubbing the back of his neck and trying to fight back a blush.

Even though it was completely obvious as to what Naruto thought he met, Sasuke was oblivious to that and shrugged his shoulders before walking over to the broken picture on the floor he hadn't noticed yet. Looking at it, Sasuke noted that it was a picture of Itachi when he was 10 years old.

"Hey, why are you holding a picture of your brother?" Naruto suddenly mentioned while smiling. Sasuke's eyes widened when he noticed Naruto had appeared by his side quite fast and gasped just a little bit.

Because no matter what, Uchiha. Did. Not. Gasp.

"I found it on the floor. It must be some kind of sign; because the glass inside the frame is broken." Sasuke replied; Naruto noticed the sudden look in his eyes and quickly grabbed the picture from him and smiled while staring at it.

"Aw! He looks **so** cute here!" Naruto mentioned in a sudden peppy voice. When realization came over him, a deadpan expression suddenly was on his face as he started talking in a monotone. "Eh...the guy's dead anyway."

With that said, Naruto carelessly threw the picture behind him, it smashed against the dusty wall and got trapped in a spider web. Sasuke stared blankly the whole time, but flinched when he noticed a HUGE spider crawl onto the picture.

And somewhere beyond the grave, Fugaku Uchiha rolled his eyes.

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-30 Minutes Later-**

Naruto finally accepted the fact that Sasuke wanted him to help clean out the entire house. Still, he did question WHY it had to be him; there were several other people he could have gotten to help him! It wasn't like Naruto was his servant or something.

Or, was he in Sasuke's point of view?

Shaking his head, the 17 and a half year old blond just went back to what he was doing. They had been at cleaning the place for 20 minutes, and 10 minutes after that; Naruto kind of ditched Sasuke in the kitchen and started snooping through the **freaking heavy** suitcase of "hair products".

Just to see if he kept anything INTERESTING in there...

"Hey, that's a laptop!"

And, in fact, Naruto was right! There was a laptop in that suitcase; underneath all the mess of hair products. He eagerly reached in and pulled it out; and discovered that it was black and in pretty good shape.

"I wonder what's on it..." Naruto stopped talking and grinned evilly as an idea came to mind: he could snoop around on the laptop and see what stuff was on there! Then maybe he could find out if Sasuke was really gay or not! "What the hell am I WAITING for? Time's wasting!"

Quickly and very frantically, Naruto opened up the laptop and turned it on. As he waited for it to go to the desktop; he noticed that it was an **Acer**laptop. Now really eager, Naruto set it down on the floor and grabbed one of the old dusty couches that was in the living room and put it back up. Then, he grabbed the laptop and sat down on the couch with it in his lap; but he did sneeze a little when the dust got to him.

"_COME ON! HURRY! DON'T FAIL ME NOW!_" Naruto thought. It was very obvious that he was getting WAY too anxious at that moment.

Unfortunately, the wallpaper didn't come up. Instead, something came up and told him to enter the **password**. This annoyed him and he rolled his eyes.

"Oh c'mon! Really Sasuke, it's not like you ever had to worry about someone snooping around on your laptop!" Naruto yelled; unaware of the fact that Sasuke was in the next room and could hear him.

"What? What did you just say? I'm running the faucet to clean out the strangely-colored sink!"

"Nothing! I didn't say anything because...I'm ah...d-dusting the walls in here!"

Sasuke didn't respond. That was a good sign to Naruto. After sighing with relief, he started typing the first thing that came to mind, which he randomly guessed to be the password: "**Sexy Naruto**". When the computer accepted that and proceeded to go to the desktop...

Naruto's jaw dropped.

After sitting for about ten seconds, Naruto closed his mouth just as the computer went to the desktop. However, it was a little disappointing when he went to the desktop; because it just had a picture of the Uchiha crest. Still, he didn't want to end his snooping so soon.

"Let's see...maybe there's some pictures and videos in here..."

Upon sticking his finger onto the panel thing that acted as the mouse (...Sorry, I might have screwed that up. I never use that on MY laptop; I use the mouse. And plus, I never even owned an Acer laptop before; mine's an Apple!) the arrow on the screen went around and settled on some folders. He clicked the folder and it brought up some pictures.

Of course, the pictures were a little too small to see. So Naruto randomly clicked on one to bring it up and enlarge it. Naruto's jaw kind of dropped again and hung there almost defying gravity as he gawked at the picture.

There, in all it's horror, was an apparently secretly taken picture of that bitchy red-haired girl, Karin, strangling some guy with white hair wearing a purple shirt that was apparently trying to laugh while holding a pair of glasses in the air. But the shocking/scary thing was: Karin was scantily clad in a very short fluffy towel.

"...I think I just lost some my eyesight." Naruto muttered before gagging and clicking off the picture.

Deciding that he would snoop around for pictures LATER, Naruto moved the arrow down to the 'E' icon and clicked it. Normally, he wouldn't have questioned something like that, but he suddenly found himself wondering why there was an 'E' when "internet" was spelled with an '**I**'.

After around eleven minutes later in the kitchen, Sasuke sighed as he noticed that the odd color in the sink was FINALLY washing away; he didn't know that a sink could look so freakin' horrifying after years of being deserted! And somehow, he didn't want to know how that was even possible. The Uchiha reached over and turned off the faucet before turning around and examining the kitchen.

One thing was for sure, he had been gone much longer than he thought. Because it looked just as bad as the living room, and god knows how the other rooms in the large home might look! But, he then noted the good details: he had Naruto there to help him.

In more ways than **one** of course, but he quickly dismissed those thoughts as he walked over to the screen and slid it open before walking back into the living room. When he entered the living room, he blinked when he noticed Naruto on the old dusty couch with **his** laptop.

"Naruto, what are you doing?" Sasuke questioned. He walked over to Naruto as he looked up and smiled. But he didn't get a reply from him, so he just walked behind him and leaned over his shoulder to look at the screen. "...Fanfiction? What the hell is that?"

"I don't know." Naruto confessed while frowning. He noticed that Sasuke was pretty much resting his head on his shoulder to look at the screen and he shifted slightly from the sudden closeness between them. "Uh... I overheard Kakashi-Sensei and Iruka-Sensei talking about it five days ago. They were saying something about 'a hot girl on girl action fanfic' before I walked up."

"So...what is fanfiction?" Sasuke asked again. He was getting irritated by how Naruto wouldn't come out and answer the question.

"Well, I decided to be blunt ask them what the hell they were talking about. Iruka-Sensei said that fanfiction is where people who are fans of various shows/books/games/ect, can write fiction about the characters in whatever situations they want. It sounded REALLY cool!" Naruto replied. "And from what Kakashi-Sensei said, fanfiction has gained much attention throughout the nations since we finally realized the internet existed! Even people here in the village writes about different things! I really wanted to check it out, but that was when me, Sai, Sakura, and Ino all went out to bring you back."

It took a few seconds to register all that Sasuke said in his mind, and he was a little lost. But still, this "fanfiction" did seem pretty cool! In fact, he was starting to get interested in the concept of it. He thought for a minute and then looked back at the screen.

"I think I get it now. So...is this a website that it's published on?" Sasuke asked.

"Yeah. I don't know it's name; never really looked into it." Naruto mumbled. He gestured to the screen and smirked. "Well, let's read some fanfiction!"

"Yes, let's do it. But then, you're going to have to help me clean up this place..." Sasuke replied while looking blank once again.

Naruto rolled his eyes at that and then looked back at the screen. He hovered over a link to a various fanfic and then clicked it. Both ninja waited patiently, and then the story came up...in all it's **horror**.

Unfortunately, Naruto and Sasuke weren't aware that things were about to get pretty crazy for them. And after discovering this "fanfiction", they would never be able to see the people they knew in the same way ever again! When entering the unpredictable world of fanfiction, ANYTHING could happen!

_**Continued.**_

_**[XXXXX]**_

_**Well, there you have it: this odd fic. ^_^ Look, I know this probably isn't my best, but like I said before: I COULDN'T get this idea out of my mind! It wouldn't leave me alone, and for the record: the idea came to me LAST NIGHT. I just got around to posting it today. -_-**_

_**Anyway, I hope this story will get some attention, and maybe some reviews. But like I said, it's probably not all that good...**_

_**This first chapter probably wasn't all that funny; but there will be some funny parts coming up. Along with Naruto and Sasuke's first looks into the world of...FANFICTION! *Insert a random scream of horror here* Since this is slightly AU, some characters that are assumed "dead" are alive in here and will randomly make a few appearances.**_

_**Incase you didn't get it, (I'm assuming the hints are obvious) there's a little bit of NaruSasu kind of mixed in here. I don't support that pairing, however, it's SO obvious that it's bound to happen by the end of the series. And there's quite a lot of supporters (why? I mean, let me tell you a good Naruto yaoi pairing: NarutoxGaara! *Winks* But I don't actually support that either. ^^; ). I think I threw this in, because I have a pretty good feeling that it's gonna happen.**_

_**Well anyway, let me say this too: the updates for this story should be completely random at the moment. College tends to take up a lot of time for me. -.- I still will try to not leave anyone hanging too long!**_

_**Read and review! :)**_


	2. ItaSasu and Incest: WTF?

_**Author's Note: Finally, the second chapter! Honestly, I think it COULD be better. But maybe that's because I don't support the pairing that's frequently used and mentioned in this chapter. Anyway, there's a small appearance by Shikamaru and Zetsu (yeah, I don't know WHY I threw Zetsu in; please don't ask! -_-')**_

_**CHAPTER WARNING: This chapter includes some incest between Sasuke and Itachi in a random fanfiction the two idiots-cough...I mean friends come across. And there's some fleeting (and I MEAN fleeting) Naruto/Sasuke moments, also some Zetsu bashing; but I DO like Zetsu, so it's kind of brief. ^^; Oh, and everyone's probably going to be OOC from here on!**_

_**^Some chapters will include a warning like that. Because I don't want anyone to flame me for not warning them what's included; and rant on and on about how they hate that certain pairing, theme, ect. If you don't like incest, NaruSasu (I don't like that either to be honest. -_-), or brief Zetsu bashing (IF you're a fan of Zetsu of course.), then you're better off either skipping those parts or skipping the entire chapter.**_

"**DON'T READ SOMETHING YOU HATE AND THEN FLAME; IT ONLY MAKES YOU LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT." **_-My friend, Mandy. :) One of her smartest/spot-on quotes EVER. PERIOD._

_**...Just a warning. :P Read on now, now that you know!**_

_**[XXXXX]**_

_**The Many Horrors of Fanfiction!:**_

_**Chapter Two; ItaSasu and Incest: WTF?**_

Naruto and Sasuke's fate was sealed the moment they went to the un-named fanfiction website.

There was no escape then.

For there was much horror for them to witness. And it would only probably scar them for the rest of their lives. The question is: what will they discover first?

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Sasuke's Old Home 5:00 PM-**

Naruto and Sasuke had only been on the website for a few minutes. But during that time, they randomly clicked on a couple of fanfics: they were some Bleach fics under the 'humor' genre. Actually, the were only 200-word drabbles.

But they were **funny** and **shocking** at the same time. So funny; Naruto was laughing his ass off and Sasuke was having to bite his own tongue so he wouldn't laugh.

"NOW THAT'S FREAKING HILARIOUS! I can so picture Ichigo and Karin accidentally getting set up on a blind date together!" Naruto hysterically mentioned after regaining his 'composure' back. "Man, that was hilarious!"

"Yeah...but...what the hell is Bleach, anyway?" Sasuke suddenly asked; rubbing his stiff neck.

"Um...it's this stuff that you use when washing clothes." Naruto replied matter-of-factly. He then looked blank and rolled his eyes. "And people call ME an idiot..."

Sasuke stared. He stared really, really blankly.

"...I meant the anime of which this drabble was based on." Sasuke muttered while sighing. It was really weird how he did both at once, but Naruto didn't feel like questioning how he did that.

"Oh! Bleach is a shonen anime/manga series created by Tite Kubo!" Naruto mentioned while smiling. "I occasionally get some of the manga and read it! It's so cool; there's this world called the Soul Society, and these shinigami-"

"I GET IT!" Sasuke eventually yelled. When he realized he had done that, his eyes widened and then he went and collected himself by putting on a blank I-couldn't-care-less look.

Still, Sasuke had to admit, those two Bleach drabbles were funny. And even though he knew nothing of Bleach, he inwardly admired the work and thought that was put into it. From the writer's name, it was **obvious** that those two drabbles were written by Yamato.

"Hey, let's see what other things are on here! This 'fanfiction' seems pretty cool!" Naruto declared. Shortly after saying that, he clicked back to the main page and then went to a different category from there.

If only he **knew**, what was coming to them.

"I just hope it's not a fanfiction with some family members having to be on a date like that." Sasuke spoke up; still resting his head over Naruto's shoulder. The latter was still trying to shuffle away from the weight though. "I don't know what term you use to describe that, but seeing family members having to do something like that is a little...**awkward**."

"I know. But I don't have a problem with family members having to do that." Naruto mentioned as if he was talking about a causal everyday topic. "The first time I saw this picture of my mom, I thought she looked real **sexy**!"

...**Silence.**

Awkward silence kind of overcame them from Naruto's last statement. Sasuke was a little too freaked out at that moment to reply. Even though SEVERAL questions haunted him, he tried to ditch the subject all together.

"You should have seen the picture, Sasuke! She had long silky red hair-"

"Naruto..."

"-A really toned body..."

"You're freaking me out."

"...And these huge well-shaped breasts. If I wasn't starting to get interested in **guys** at the time, I'd-"

"NARUTO!"

Naruto blinked repeatedly and then looked over at Sasuke with a bewildered expression on his face. Why did Sasuke yell all of a sudden? It was weird.

"Yeah? What, Sasuke?"

Sasuke's eye twitched and he glanced away before rolling his eyes.

"...Forget it. Just...just forget it."

Fortunately for Sasuke, the doorbell rung. Even though he never knew that the house even had a doorbell, he was glad it was there. Quickly, he walked over to the door and Naruto looked over at him.

"Where are you going?"

"There's someone at the door. Pull another fanfiction while I answer it."

"_Why the hell would some idiot visit this dump?_" Naruto thought as he made a disgusted look and pulled up another fanfiction that was under the genre: romance/angst.

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-The Ninja Academy 5:16 PM-**

Shikamaru Nara stood in front of a window that was in one of the academy rooms. It was unknown at the moment as to WHY the hell he was even there, but it wasn't of any importance to the plot; so it wasn't mentioned.

He was stunned at the moment. Why?

Because he just saw something utterly **crazy**; it could have just been the fact that he hadn't gotten much sleep lately, but he thought he had just seen a walking plant wearing an Akatsuki cloak walk past the academy!

"Hey, why are you staring out the window?" Iruka asked; suddenly appearing into the room. "You look like you just saw something crazy: like a _MINI VAN_!"

"I...I just saw a walking plant wearing an Akatsuki cloak." Shikamaru mentioned before rubbing his eyes and turning around to face the older shinobi.

"...Um...WTF are you talking about?" Iruka muttered; a sweatdrop suddenly on his head as he gave Shikamaru a look that said...'do you need to be taken down to the loony bin?'.

"Yeah, I just don't know anymore." Shikamaru mumbled before brushing past Iruka and walking out of the academy classroom. "After I go get laid by Temari again, things will probably make sense then..."

Even though awkward silence followed after Shikamaru's last statement, Iruka smiled and waved.

"See you around, then! And...be safe with that woman; you should SEE the fanfiction that her brother writes about her!" Iruka called out. He called that out as if some everyday kind of event was happening.

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Sasuke's Old Home 5:20 PM-**

Sasuke quickly adjusted his clothes for no apparent reason, and then hastily brushed through his weird hair. After all, he couldn't **risk** having someone seeing look like a slob.

Even though...he kind of did already because of his stupid hair.

"Hey, what-OMFG!" Sasuke cried out indignantly as he opened the door; revealing Zetsu. He then started panting and after several seconds, composed himself and clutched his heart as it pretty much beat right out of his chest.

"**...Yeah, we get that a lot.**" Zetsu's dark half mentioned bitterly as Sasuke tried to collect himself again.

"Wh-WHO are you? And WHY do you look like a plant/human **hybrid**?" Sasuke asked frantically.

"**Oh, stop freaking out!** Zetsu, be nicer! **Will you stop talking?** Zestu! **SHUT UP!** I WON'T SHUT UP, YOU BASTARD! **WELL STOP INTERFERING WITH ALL THAT BULLSHIT YOU SPOUT OFF! **I HATE YOU! **I DESPISE EVERY CELL OF YOUR BEING!** JERK! **FAGGOT!**"

Sasuke could only stare blankly as he witnessed the very bizarre argument. First of all: it was just plain weird because of the fact that it was between the two halves of a plant/human "hybrid".

All he knew was that he had returned back to the village he once betrayed, duped his unintelligent blond friend into helping him clean his old home, discovered the "**wonderful**" (not like it would be for long!) world of fanfiction, and then answered the door.

...Yeah. That was probably one of the most awkward moments he'd ever experienced in his life.

"Uh...why don't you two settle this elsewhere?" Sasuke said; mostly to himself since Zetsu wasn't listening. Slowly and awkwardly, Sasuke grabbed the door and slammed it before walking back over to the couch with Naruto.

"So who was at the door?" Naruto asked as he looked up from the laptop.

Sasuke just rubbed the back of his neck and then shook his head before walking back over to behind the couch and resting his head back against Naruto's shoulder. He then explained that he REALLY had no idea what happened; that there was a weird plant/human hybrid at the door. And it started arguing with it's split personality, never even explaining **why** he was even there in the first place.

And Naruto's obvious reaction to that: was an expression that pretty much said, "What drug have you been getting high on?"

"...We really need to get back to cleaning the house." Sasuke sighed and glanced down at a random watch that appeared seemingly from nowhere on his left wrist. "It's getting kind of late, Naruto."

"I know. But...I think you should check out this fanfiction I was just reading." Naruto nervously explained. "Eh...it really is freaking me out."

"What is it?"

"...Look and see for yourself!" Naruto replied a little too quickly before grabbing the laptop and putting it back on his lap. Afterward, Sasuke leaned over a little farther and looked at the screen.

Naruto of course, made a weird expression when he felt Sasuke's breathing in his ear. It was comfortable and annoying at the same time.

"_Hmm. This fanfiction's title is: A New Beginning With You. Sounds angsty!_" Sasuke thought as him and Naruto read over the title. "_Wait...it's a angst/romance fic. INTERESTING..._"

"Um...let's scroll down a little farther into it, and then you'll see what I'm talking about!" Naruto quickly mentioned. Sasuke blinked at that, and gestured for him to scroll it down so he could see what he was referring too.

...And once he started reading the part that Naruto was re**f**erring too, he started to regret every minute as time awkwardly dragged on**:**

_**[XXXXX]**_

_Eyes widened dramatically, Sasuke Uchiha could barely even bear what he had just overheard his mysterious older brother confess._

_He wanted to just break down. Break down into tears. He lied on his bed and pretty much clawed the covers. He knew very well that it was impossible for their love to ever be._

_They were...brothers. Not just brothers; but brothers that belonged to the Uchiha clan! If word got out that they harbored much lust for each other, the clan's reputation would decrease and lose it's reputation. Besides, Itachi was being forced to marry Hinata Hyuuga, the heiress to the Hyuuga clan, in just two more weeks._

_Even though she was the same age as himself: eighteen._

_Tears threatening to spill over in Sasuke's eyes, he choked a little as an odd sick feeling overcame him. He was just too torn over what to do; he had overheard his older brother confess to himself in his room that had feelings for him, way more than what he should feel._

_...He was harbored great lust for him. Even admitting that he sometimes thought about having sex with him._

_Sasuke felt the exact same way of course, and thinking about how they could never actually be together, and the fact that Itachi was going to have to marry the Hyuuga heiress saddened him to the point where suicide was very tempting._

"_I shouldn't have tried to deny all this! If I had just realized a long time ago that I was in love with Itachi, then I could have probably done something!"_

"_You couldn't have done anything, Sasuke."_

_Hearing Itachi's voice, Sasuke's eyes snapped open and he felt heat creep up from his neck to his cheeks as he sat up and gawked at his brother in the now-open doorway.  
"Itachi..."_

"_You...you overheard what I said earlier, didn't you?" Itachi inquired; brushing his long sexy hair back with his fingers and walking closer to the bed after closing the door back._

_For once in his life, Sasuke was speechless. No matter what, he couldn't speak at the moment. His eyes showed much surprise and his face seemed to have only gotten more redder by the minute._

"_I...I...yes." Sasuke replied; desperately trying to shield his face from view. The seconds ticked by rather slowly, and yet, Sasuke's embarrassment never left. "Look, this isn't right. We can't feel this way towards each other; it's...it's just not meant to be."_

_Itachi seemed to have not been convinced by that. He walked closer to the bed and sat down, much to Sasuke's discomfort. "Sasuke...look at me."_

"_What?"_

_To his surprise, Itachi leaned forward and gently caressed Sasuke's abnormally-warmer than usual face. Feeling a sudden bulge coming from his pants, Sasuke almost gasped and pulled away._

"_Who says it isn't meant to be?" Itachi asked; Sasuke noticed the sudden look in his eyes and stared in surprise. "Maybe it isn't allowed, but...nobody will know if we just a take chance **one night**._

_Itachi gently pulled his hand away, and then briefly glanced over at the closed and locked door. Then, he begun to free his sexy raven hair from it's ponytail and Sasuke watched in much delight._

_Itachi was kind of right. Nobody would know, right? At least he could finally give in to the lusty desires he had been overcome with for a few years around his brother. "Screw the rules, I've been waiting a long time for this."_

"_So have I, Sasuke."_

_In no more than two minutes, both brother's clothes were stripped off and lay forgotten in the floor. Passionately, Itachi got over Sasuke and penetrated his-_

_**[XXXXX]**_

Naruto cringed inwardly when he felt a sudden weight on his shoulder again. He sweatdropped and turned his head a little to look at Sasuke.

"Um...yeah, that's what I wanted you to see. Ummm...so...are you...okay?" Naruto nervously asked as he noticed Sasuke's eyes widened ten fold and his jaw pretty much defying gravity as it hung open past his much paler than normal face.

"S-Sasuke?"  
Naruto never got that reply. Because Sasuke was able to close his mouth. And as the Uchiha re-read over the entire part of the fanfiction quickly; and even reading _past_, his eyes rolled to the back of his head and he fell backwards onto the floor and fainted.

"SASUKE!"

Naruto quickly glanced at the screen and shuddered before exiting the internet and closing the laptop screen and placing it on the couch. He then got up and ran over to behind the couch where Sasuke laid unconscious.

"Sasuke! Damn it! WAKE UP! IT WASN'T _THAT_ BAD! IT'S JUST FICTIONAL INCEST!"

Ah, fanfiction. With it's unpredictable and stunning ways, no one; not even ninja can see where they're going. It's a horror that is both sneaky and awkward at the same time.

Naruto and Sasuke only caught just a mere **glimpse **of fanfiction. Not knowing that they would be in for one HELL of a time with it! And it was only a matter of time before one of them lost it and became utterly traumatized!

_**Continued.**_

_**[XXXXX]**_

_**DUN DUN DUN! Naruto and Sasuke's first steps into the many horrors of fanfiction! ;) And yeah, I know I'm strange! And...I just HAD to include a reference to Bleach at some point! ^^;**_

_**Well, um, hope this chapter was fine. It's a little short; it was the best I could do at the moment. I don't really support incest...and I think it's kind of disgusting, really. -_- But, incest is something that you come across in fanfiction, so it seemed fitting to add that in. I even wonder how I typed that without gagging! O_O I also think ItaSasu is...well, gross. But it's an incest pairing I've seen a lot in my years of checking out fanfiction. A new friend of mine who thinks incest is deep and likeable, helped give me an idea for a "fanfic" that Naruto and Sasuke could come across.**_

_**She also helped encourage me to even post this chapter. So...um...thanks, I guess. X_X By the way, I randomly wrote that "ItaSasu fic" they came across. It's actually part of a real fanfiction I wrote, but never posted; because it was written on a dare, so that's why it probably sucks. -_-' Ugh...*washes my eyes* horrible!**_

_**Naruto and Sasuke will discover a lot more soon! Be VERY afraid... ;) The next update should come whenever I have the time, BTW.**_

_**Read and review! :)**_


	3. A Visit From Sakura

_**Author's Note: Alright, the third chapter! ^_^ Why am I so excited all of a sudden? *Rolls eyes* I shouldn't really BE excited right now, I (like always) think this chapter could be better. *Sighs***_

_**...But that's just ME. -_-**_

_**I can't believe I'm actually up to three chapters now. The moment I posted this, I figured it would be an epic failure and I would discontinue it. O_O But, I am kind of glad readers actually like it! And now...here's the (probably unnecessary) warning.**_

_**CHAPTER WARNING: Slight NaruSasu moments, mentioned incest, Naruto's stupidity and sudden intelligent moments, slight Sakura bashing, and whatever Naruto and Sasuke discover next as they enter the territory of...FANFICTION! :P**_

_**Read on now. Oh, and...sorry if it's not all that good.**_

_**[XXXXX]**_

_**The Many Horrors of Fanfiction!**_

_**Chapter Three: A Visit From Sakura**_

Like said before, Fanfiction is truly something unpredictable. And with it's seductive title and summary, you will only get lured in and then...your eyes lost their virginity, or you just got utterly scarred for life.

This is all put to the test when 17 year old ninja, Naruto and Sasuke, accidentally discover fanfiction.

After witnessing hilarious/shocking Bleach drabbles, incest, and angsty ItaSasu, Naruto and Sasuke have become a little shocked by what they saw.

However.

They haven't seen **nothing** yet. What will they discover next?

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Hidden Leaf Gate 5:30 PM-**

Zetsu was still arguing with himself. And, sadly, he eventually wandered away from Sasuke's home and to the village gate. And once the odd one-sided argument began, he kind of ditched the reason why he even went there in the first place. He was also getting stunned and puzzled looks from various villagers.

"YOU'RE SUCH A DOUCHE BAG! **YOU'RE SO GAY!** Zetsu, just zip you're mouth already? **WHY should I? You gonna beat me up?** I can't beat you up! I would only hurt MYSELF! **I WISH YOU WOULD STOP BEING SO DAMN SMART!** _SOMEBODY_ has to be the smart one: but it sure as hell ain't you! **Stop spouting off all that bullshit in a freaking COUNTRY ACCENT!** WHAT THE HELL IS A 'COUNTRY ACCENT' ANYWAY? WE'RE IN A FRICKIN' _JAPANESE_ TIME PERIOD! **Then stop randomly talking in a country accent! **I HATE YOU! **Well, I STILL despise you!**"

As Zetsu's arguing with himself got louder and much more annoying, Sakura Haruno hummed the tune to some random song, that became stuck in her head after she started writing fanfiction, as she passed by the village gate. When her, Naruto, Sai, and Ino all decided to work together and bring Sasuke back by torture, she and the other three had gone on ahead back to the village to report their (unfortunate) success. Meanwhile, they had left Naruto and Sasuke behind. After all, EVERYBODY was starting to get the idea that they were crazy for each other. By leaving them behind, they wouldn't just be doing the two a favor, they would also be satisfying the creepy yaoi fangirl's perverted wants. It was a wildly known fact:

Most of the yaoi fangirls in the world were all **Leaf kunoichi**.

Sakura being just another yaoi fangirl herself, was thrilled that Sasuke returned; and she could start getting back into the spirit of drawing some really perverted images of him and Naruto to put all over the internet.

However, the pink-haired medic nin's eyes snapped open as she passed by Zetsu. She quickly started walking backwards and then stopped to stare in shock at the 'weird' plant man that was arguing with himself.

It was just plain **creepy**.

"Uh...WTF is going on over there?" Sakura gasped out as she gave Zetsu a strange look. "Is that one of those plant/human hybrid things I've heard about?"

Sakura then stared. She stared a long time. Probably around ten minutes. Because...she had completely forgot what she was about to do after seeing that weird scene.

"_I THINK I was about to go visit Sasuke. But...I'm not too sure about that one._" Sakura thought, suddenly frowning and crossing her arms over her chest. "_After all, Sasuke went all power-obsessed, hooked up with some pedophile Micheal Jackson-wannabe, turned me into a complete weakling in front of Naruto and company, deserted Orochimaru and then hooked up with a couple of other guys and a whore in short shorts, and then tried to destroy the home village. ...Eh, he's good-looking still; I'll give him some credit for that!_"

Sakura tried to not act like a stupid stalker of a fangirl anymore. However, that didn't mean that she couldn't still think Sasuke was the sexiest, most badass guy **ever in history**, right? She took a moment of silence to praise his looks and then started calmly strolling to the bitter Uchiha's old home.

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Sasuke's Old Home 5:41 PM-**

"SASUKE! WAKE UP!"

It was obvious at that moment, and an explanation wasn't needed; but it was thrown in anyway, after wandering around a fanfiction site...Naruto and Sasuke figured they would see some interesting things.

However, all they got was a bunch of mindless sex scenes: centering on Sasuke and Itachi of course.

This caused Sasuke to faint. But it was unknown if it was from shock, horror, or embarrassment. ...Naruto didn't know which one to believe so he went with 'horror'. Weirdly, he was very much spot-on!

"IT WAS JUST INCEST! AND IT WASN'T EVEN REAL!" Naruto cried out hysterically as he waved his arms around in the air crazily. "I mean, I don't see what you're complaining about! Itachi was so _SEXY_!"

Sasuke had unfortunately woken up by the time Naruto had said the part about the scene not being real. And thus, he had heard the part about Itachi being sexy and groaned before facepalming.

"I could have gone my whole life without hearing YOU say that!" Sasuke mentioned. He then promptly fainted from shock again and Naruto screeched indignantly before running to the kitchen.

Now inside the really dusty and deserted looking kitchen, Naruto frantically looked around for cups, figuring that nobody even bothered to take away all the various dishes and cups in the cabinets, so he could wake Sasuke up the old-fashioned dramatic way:

By simply drenching him with water.

"_OH COME ON! WHERE THE HELL DID THEY KEEP CUPS? I FEEL REALLY SORRY FOR SASUKE'S PARENTS ALL OF A SUDDEN; and...I have no idea why..._" Naruto thought while ravaging the kitchen in his attempt to find cups.

In his wake, Naruto sent dust flying, cobwebs cut in half and falling into the skin, an old chair to disintegrate randomly (how he did that one, Naruto would never understand.), and knocked over some old buckets that **were** neatly stacked.

However, his search was over when his blue eyes caught sight of a cup on one of the counters. Smiling, Naruto grabbed the cup and started pouring water into it. Really, he had no idea that there was still any water running through the pipes! Even though it was possible that it was full of bacteria, Naruto took the cup of water and frantically slid the screen back and left.

"I hope this makes him up..." Naruto murmured aloud as he walked over to the unconscious mess of evil on the floor.

Although...Naruto did consider leaving Sasuke there like that; it would get him out of having to "**help**" him "**clean his house**". Then he sighed and prepared to pour the water on him. There was no way he could get out of that anyway, and plus: he wanted to check out more fanfiction with him.

Somehow, he actually thought that incest was sweet. But that, of course, was in Naruto's weird point of view...so...

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-5 Minutes Later-**

In no more than approximately 5 minutes, a young girl of about seventeen walked up to Sasuke's old home. At first, she nearly performed an epic facepalm upon seeing how deserted and old it looked. She figured all this time that the Hokage would have AT LEAST had gotten someone to clean out the place when he was still around.

After all, one would think that if he sent some ninja out to dispose of the many dead bodies, he would at least get them to clean out the house too. But...sadly, that didn't happen.

Anyway, this girl walked up to the doorway, and now in view: her looks gave her supposed-unknown identity away easily. Because she had short pink hair (natural of course: but wasn't a Mary-Sue in any shape or form) and big green eyes. She wore a sleeveless red kunoichi shirt and a short blue skirt. Some ninja sandals that had bands up to just above her ankles. The red Leaf headband was around her neck.

And if it wasn't too obvious as to who she was already: she was Sakura Haruno. Who, although still freaked out from witnessing Zetsu's **one-sided** argument, placed a friendly smile on her face as she started to knock on the door.

...What she heard from the inside, however, made her stop before she touched the door a second time.

"Dammit, Sasuke! Get up off the floor now; I hear ANOTHER person at the door! Seriously, who would visit this dump, anyway?"

"It's not a 'dump', Naruto. And look, I would be getting off the floor if you hadn't drenched me! I mean...it's going to take me a week just to get my hair back to normal!"

"Always thinking about yourself, Sasuke..."

"Why don't YOU answer the door?"

"Are you crazy? I want to see more of that **hot** sex between you and your brother!"

"Oh my god, YOU'RE SO SICK!"

"So are you! Tch...running off to some pedophile snake man who would have definitely molested you if Kabuto hadn't always been like a stalker and walk in...JUST at the right moment!"

"...How do you know that happened?"

"Well that's what I- wait...THAT REALLY DID HAPPEN TO YOU?"

"...No."

Sakura's smile instantly faded. She stared really blankly for several seconds when awkward silence followed. Before making a disgusted face, she suddenly questioned why Naruto was there, and why they were talking about things like that.

"If I can run away quick enough, neither can catch me!" Sakura muttered before turning around to run.

"Hi, Sakura!"

Too late. Sakura muttered a curse under her breath and then chuckled nervously before turning around.

"Oh...eh...ah...h-hey..." Sakura stammered, unable to look Naruto in the eyes. He blinked and then shrugged his shoulders.

"Hey, why are you so nervous?"

"Ah! N-no reason!" Sakura assured before holding her hands up. "I...I just came by to visit Sasuke since he's back. But it's weird, I suddenly felt the need to do that AFTER I witnessed a plant man wearing an Akatsuki cloak argue with himself..."

Normally, a person would probably freak out after hearing what Sakura just explained. Naruto didn't. He didn't because he has heard/seen a lot more weirder things than that. Still...that would all be questioned once he saw MORE of fanfiction.

"Okay. I'm here '**helping**' him '**clean the house**'" Sakura noticed the emphasis that put stress on those words. And suddenly started thinking some really perverted thoughts; she then inwardly cursed Anko for even introducing her to yaoi in the first place. "Anyway, you can still come in. But...uh...watch out, because it's a freaking DUMP in there!"

"Okay?"

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Sasuke's Old Home 5:47 PM-**

Naruto was not kidding when he described the house being a dump. Sakura took one step inside and her eyes nearly bugged out when she saw everything; including the drenched Sasuke complaining about his hair and a bunch of other stuff that wasn't important at ALL so it wasn't mentioned.

"Oh my god! Hasn't anyone ever heard of 'CLEANING OUT THE HOUSE'? It looks horrible!" Sakura commented.

"I know! Sasuke can't live here! He deserves better..." Naruto mentioned. Sakura glanced at Naruto and blushed faintly before shifting her weight on her feet.

"Weeeell...there's room at-"

"I'm not staying at your house, Sakura." Sasuke spoke up in a monotone as he looked over.

"I wasn't talking about mine!" Sakura protested a little **too fast**. But Naruto and Sasuke both knew she was really referring to her home. "I was about to say that...Naruto has some room. So, why don't you just live with him?"

And Sakura knew deep down that she wasn't talking about them being merely roommates. And she suddenly had an idea for a nice shonen-ai fanfiction in mind; she made a mental note to later write that one down.

"He can't live with me! People will think we're gay or something!" Naruto protested.

"...Naruto, everyone ALREADY thinks that."

"...Oh."

Sasuke rolled his eyes and then stepped into the scene. He pushed Naruto aside a little and then started to try and wring out his wet hair (because Naruto had a cup that was ten times bigger than his hand and had it filled up to the brim with water).

"Listen, I can live here. But Naruto's helping me clean the place out. Do you think you could help us?" Sasuke asked. Naruto noticed the odd fleeting look in Sasuke's eyes; and he suddenly shuddered.

Now, Sakura would have wanted to help. Really. She would have. However, she DID have a life; and was very busy with being sent out on missions, working with the medic teams, writing fanfiction, and trying to develop a new medical ninjutsu that would hopefully get rid of the sudden obsession with alcohol she's been getting.

So she couldn't help them. She politely rejected of course. But then Naruto threw up his arms in despair and Sasuke was on the verge of facepalming.

"I'm sorry. I just...have a life." Sakura muttered lamely. "Look, this gives you guys a chance to get re-acquainted; you haven't actually had a good-hearted chat in so many years! Besides, this predicament also will put how much you trust each other: you'll have to work together and-"

"...You just want to get home and write more _hot_ sex scenes with Sasuke and Itachi, don't you?"

Awkward silence followed after that. Sakura's face turned scarlet red in a reasonable amount of time, and Sasuke looked ghostly pale. Naruto, however, was feeling smart at the moment; and he decided to make the most of their shock and smirk in triumph.

"HOW DO YOU KNOW I WRITE THAT?" Sakura almost screeched as she thrust an accusing finger at Naruto. "I TRY _VERY_ TO KEEP MY AUTHORESS IDENTITY A _SECRET_! YOU'RE TOO STUPID TO FIGURE IT OUT!"

Yes it was really true that Naruto was stupid. However, he did have some moments of being smart. It was almost like...sometimes he would see through things and then carefully analyze the chances of it being obvious or not obvious. Then, after deciding, cautiously leak information from the victims and put it all together almost spontaneously.

It's too bad that he really _didn't_ do all that. Because that would be OOC for him.

After Sakura stormed up to Naruto and angrily grabbed his shirt, the latter, although scared, flipped open the **Acer laptop** and gestured to the top of the page brought up. Sakura furrowed her eyebrows and scowled before letting go of him and looking at what he was referring too: the name of the ItaSasu fanfiction's author was...**CherryBlossom17** a rather **obvious **name.

"...Oh." was all Sakura could mutter in a deadpan monotone. A sweatdrop appeared on the side of her head.

"You're supposed to be smart, but you can't pick a name that nobody would figure out?" Sasuke asked as he suddenly appeared by her side.

"I wasn't thinking at the time!" Sakura protested as she gave him a glare that would put the famous **Uchiha Death Glare** to the test.

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Some Unknown Amount of Time Later-**

Sakura was a little stunned that she was discovered; but then realized that her name was definitely obvious. Naruto was a little surprised to find out that she had been writing various fanfiction about people for a long time; but never told them.

And Sasuke? Well, he was stunned that Sakura felt like incest was sweet. And he was also stunned to find out that she had written a total of 102 hundred fanfiction stories in only six years.

Now sitting on the old dusty couch with her two old teammates, Sakura sighed dramatically and then set down the laptop before resting one of her legs over the other.

"How come you never told anybody? Your wrote the dirty parts so well from that fanfiction!" Naruto asked. This caused Sakura to set her gaze on Naruto.

"Well...I guess I just didn't want you guys to freak out. Besides, most of my fanfiction isn't too **innocent** if you get what I'm sayin'..." Sakura mentioned, ending it with a forced nervous laugh.

"I figured that out..." Sasuke commented. He hastily then looked away as he felt Naruto and Sakura's blank stares on him.

"Anyway, ENOUGH of this awkward talk! I'm glad you two are finally discovering fanfiction...but are you sure you REALLY want to find out about all the horrors that are written by various fans or friends?"

"What horrors?"

This question made Sakura tense up. She was about to crack under Naruto and Sasuke's curious gazes but used all her strength not to. After all, she vowed to herself that she wouldn't try to ever escape a stressful situation without first calmly and logically seeing it through.

But still...it just had to be **her** to be in that situation...

"Ummmm...well, like incest. Incest is written a lot on this website. It involves two people who are related; they can either be portrayed to be heterosexual or gay. It all depends..." Naruto and Sasuke merely nodded; almost apparently understanding. And Sakura shuddered from that and continued in a shaky tone. "...Er...and usually it's written in this kind of plot: the two family members realize that they love each other; not FAMILY love...I portray it as passionate love beyond what they should feel for each other. And mainly...they know they can't be together, 'cause it's sick, illegal, ect. I however, believe that incest is deep not ALWAYS sick! Yeah, let's LEAVE IT like this!"

"Thanks for warning us." Naruto spoke up as he placed a hand on Sakura's shoulder. "We should have took things like that into consideration before looking up fanfiction."

"Sooo...heh...you're going to stop reading from this site?" Sakura asked uneasily before absentmindedly scratching her arm.

"WHAT? ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND? I AM SO READING MORE!" Sakura threw up a little in her mouth before facepalming at Naruto's outburst.

"Naruto..." Sasuke and Sakura muttered in unison before sighing as Naruto frantically started hunting down incest on the site.

Yeah...things were getting more and more out of hand. As Naruto (who apparently had some obsession with incest) started reading another of **CherryBlossom17's** (Sakura's) ItaSasu fanfics, Sakura looked over at Sasuke and mentioned that she had to leave before she got too embarrassed by the situation they had caught her up in. He allowed her to leave of course, and she got up and walked over to the door.

"...You know, I hope you guys can clean this entire place out." Sakura commented suddenly, her green eyes scanning the living room from wall to wall. "It will be different having you back in the village, but eh, I'll get used to it."

"I'll have to get used to it as well. Anyway, see you later."

With that said, Sasuke gently(?) pushed Sakura outside and she gasped as she grabbed onto a piece of wood sticking out of the side of the house for support. That was the last thing Sasuke saw before he noisily slammed the door and locked it.

"Ugh...I hate all these interruptions. What is WITH that pink-haired **whore**?"

"Hey! I heard that, Sasuke!" Sakura called out from the outside. It was evident she was scowling too.

"You were supposed to!" Sasuke called back before walking back over to a grinning Naruto.

Naruto snickered a little bit as he scrolled down the page. He had found a fanfiction of Sakura's that caught his interest with it's **dazzling **summary. It was another ItaSasu incest; but it wasn't too explicit. In fact, it was under the genre **humor/romance**.

It was a little weird though. Because the plot, from what Naruto could tell, was about Sasuke and Itachi in a modern world at a boarding school. Their parents had divorced once Sasuke was born; and their father took Itachi to live with him while their mother raised Sasuke. At the school, Sasuke was pretty much forced to crossdress as a girl and stay at the school because there was no more room for any guys. And (of course), he was currently reading the part where the two have an unexpected meeting; not knowing they were really related.

Not understanding why Naruto was snickering, Sasuke rose an eyebrow and then walked over behind Naruto and read the fanfiction over his shoulder to himself:

_**[XXXXX]**_

_**Damn, why did I have to get lost?** Sasuke thought bitterly as he crossed his arms over his 'breasts' and let a pissed off expression make it's way onto his face. **I knew I should have accepted the tour of the school from that brown-haired tomboy what's-her-name! Now I won't be able to get to my room and get back to being a GUY for at least a few minutes! This skirt is way too short; I'm freezing! DAMN WHOEVER ACCEPTED THIS SCHOOL UNIFORM TO HELL!**_

_Ranting in his mind wouldn't get him anywhere. Sasuke knew that. But he just wanted to get to his room and at least go back to being a guy for a few minutes. After all, what sixteen year old guy would want to be stuck crossdressing as a girl for the entire school semester? It truly sucked. And Sasuke had seen a lot of terrible things that he should have never had to see ever since he started his act. But...he was glad that he didn't have a roommate or anything; if he did, he wouldn't be able to drop the act and go back to being a guy for a few minutes!_

_He looked down at himself and just sighed. Although, he did have some 'girly' features that made him look like a believable girl, he still wasn't comfortable at all. For one thing: he was wearing a long black wig that went a little down his spine and was straight and wavy, had makeup on his face, had fake 'breasts', and wore a tight-fitting light blue short-sleeved shirt underneath a dark blue vest with sleeves to his wrists, and he wore a really short ruffled dark blue skirt with a gold-colored belt and white socks that went up to his knees with some gold-colored sneakers._

_The good thing was, he was skinny and didn't have much muscle; even though he did have some strength. And, although he was a little embarrassed to openly admit it, he found himself attracted to guys sometimes._

_Maybe he would make a believable girl after all..._

_**Now let's see...** Sasuke reached into the little purse that was attached to the belt and pulled out a note that told him where and what room he was in. **Room 103 at...**_

"_HEY LOOK OUT!"_

_Sasuke blinked and then looked up just in time to see a girl about his age dressed in the same uniform; only, she had pink hair and big beautiful green orbs for eyes. Sasuke gasped and sidestepped as the girl nearly crashed into him and screamed before hitting the floor._

"_Owww..." The girl moaned under her breath as she rubbed her forehead._

_A panicked look flashed over Sasuke's face. He stuffed the paper back into the small purse and got down on his knees and grabbed her shoulders firmly to help her up._

"_Are you alright?" Sasuke asked, making his voice go a little more higher and girly sounding._

"_Ugh...yeah, I'm fine. I wasn't paying attention; and then one of those upperclassmen, Kabuto Yakushi, tripped me again..."_

_The girl got on her knees too and then glanced at herself; noticing she had no injuries, she sighed and then made eye contact with Sasuke before looking surprised._

"_Oh! Aren't you that new freshman girl?" Sakura suddenly asked. "Ah...you're Sasuke, right?"_

"_...Yes. I'm trying to find my room; but this school is TOO huge!" Sasuke replied; using the same voice he previously used. It was a little embarrassing to be talking like that, but the girl didn't seem to be suspicious of him/her._

"_Ugh...tell me about it! When I first came here, I thought I might pass out from exhaustion after just trying to find the bathroom!" The girl mentioned, adding an exhausted sigh afterward. "Anyway, it's nice to meet you. There's just not enough girls here; it might as well be an all-boys school! My name is Sakura Haruno by the way!"_

"_Oh, right!"_

_Silence kind of followed after that. But Sasuke was glad that Sakura wasn't suspicious at all. Judging by the way she seemed causal and lively must have been a good sign he thought._

"_Hey, I could show you to you're room, Sasuke. My friend, Ino, she has a dorm in your hall! I'm good at memorizing things, not to brag of course, and I can take you there and even tell you where everything is!"_

_Although surprised by her knowledge, Sasuke nodded and brushed through his hair lightly; making it wave beautifully, and causing a guy with spiky blond hair walking by to stare in amazement and then crash into a table._

"_Okay. That sounds good, Sakura." Sasuke mentioned, forcing a fake friendly smile._

_Both Sasuke and Sakura then started to walk off together. Even though the former WAS nervous about whether or not she would find out his real gender because she seemed intelligent, he was actually doing well with his act. And when he walked he, just for the heck of it since he practiced his girl-ish walk before enrolling, added a seductive way of swaying his hips a little. Seeing that caused the spiky blond-haired guy to gawk and a little blood started to drip from his nose._

"_Konoha Academy is a really big school; but it actually does feel like a normal school once you've been here for a little while. It's really grown on to me...I'm real sure you're fit in, Sasuke."_

_**You and me both.** Sasuke thought before crossing his arms and furrowing his eyebrows together as he walked. **I still can't believe I'm even doing this! Really? I used to be so popular, and now I'm being forced to crossdress in a short frilly skirt that looks like something out of Sailor Moon! But...at least Sakura isn't aware of the fact I'm a guy.**_

"_And that over there is the bathrooms." Sakura mentioned as if she was a tourguide. She then smiled and pointed at another room that had a slightly ajar door. "And that's the science classroom. I personally like the class; the teacher is very nice two; her name's Kurenai-AH!"_

"_What are you-OH MY GOD!"_

_That was all Sasuke and Sakura could say. Their eyes widened and they screeched a little as the door to the science classroom flung open. Then a guy, who seemed to be just a little older than them, quickly walked out and accidentally tripped a little before falling forward into Sasuke._

_Both Sasuke and the guy crashed to the floor. Sakura opened her eyes from where they were shut tightly and then they widened when she noticed the suggestive position they were in, and when she realized just who the guy was._

_Sasuke could only stare in shock at the guy's face; he was actually very attractive, but his appearance somehow looked a little familiar somehow. However, the stunned freshman was only examining the guy's long raven hair, gorgeous onyx eyes strangely similar to his own, and amazing features._

_In the back of Sasuke's mind, he was thinking: "**Oh god, he's so sexy!**"_

"_Itachi!" Sakura almost cried out hysterically as she waved her arms around wildly. "What the hell is wrong with you? Get off her!"_

_Itachi glanced up at Sakura and then looked back at Sasuke, they both wore shocked expressions. And Sasuke's face as slowly becoming stained red._

"_Oh...s-sorry."_

"_Uhhh...ah...o-o-okay..."_

_Itachi got up off him and Sasuke nervously got up as well and rubbed the back of his neck._

_**Who is this girl? She doesn't look to familiar, but she is kind of hot-**_

_**[XXXXX]**_

"**WHAT THE FUCK?**"

"Oh, lighten up, Sasuke! It's funny!"

"THAT TEARS IT! WE'RE GETTING BACK TO CLEANING THIS PLACE _NOW_!"

With that declared, Sasuke clicked the 'X' on the top of the page and then slammed down the laptop screen. Naruto stared in shock the whole time and whined.

"Come on! That was hilarious!" Naruto mentioned as he wiped a tear of laughter away. "You WOULD make a hot girl, you know..."

"Shut up!" Sasuke snapped before throwing a random broom at Naruto's head, causing the blond to cry out in pain and fall to the floor. "That's just plain **wrong**! Besides, I don't even know what the freaking hell a 'boarding school' is. I can't believe Sakura's mind!"

Naruto groaned and then climbed up from the floor. He then grabbed the broom and walked over to Sasuke and placed an arm around his shoulder before grinning.

"I can't believe you're embarrassed over a stupid FANFICTION!" Naruto mentioned. Sasuke glared at him and then clenched his hands into fists tightly.

"...Just **shut up** and sweep the floor...because I have to go bleach my eyes out; the pain will make me forget about the horror I just witnessed."

Naruto suddenly frowned and then nodded. He walked over to the other side of the room and begun sweeping dust with the random broom while Sasuke went to the kitchen and started searching for some bleach.

And it didn't occur to Naruto that it was **dangerous** to put bleach in ones eyes. Because he was too busy having some sudden images come into his mind; really weird images of Sasuke as a girl wearing some really revealing outfits.

...Yes, they were officially crazy. But **neither** ninja had any idea that they would get scarred for life the more they looked into fanfiction. What will they discover next? THAT is the question...

_**Continued.**_

_**[XXXXX]**_

_**Ummm...yeah, kind of an awkward chapter, huh? -_-' Well, this entire story is SUPPOSED to be weird and awkward, so I guess that's fine!**_

_**I hope this chapter was fine. Here, we see that Sakura writes fanfiction; and seems to have some kind of odd obsession with Uchihacest. See, various characters will be dropping by from time to time, and when they do: Naruto and Sasuke are going to either learn a little bit more about fanfiction or just get really freaked out. To be blunt: I think it's going to be really weird. ^^'**_

_**Keep in mind, I do not really support incest; the "fanfiction" Sakura "wrote" isn't mine. One of my friends who thinks incest is hot, wrote the fanfiction down on paper (she won't get an account on this site because she usually uses her Quizilla account from time to time and doesn't have much time to write. Sorry, IDK what her account name is. T.T) and it has about 39 chapters in total, but it's complete. She let me read over some of the beginning chapters and allowed me to use brief parts of it in here.**_

_**...Thank you (I THINK? O.O) Mackenzie; if you're reading this! ^_^ I highly doubt you are, but I'm just trying to add to the randomness of this note! :P**_

_**BTW, Sakura's "name" is something I randomly came up with for her. Because of the fact that 'Sakura' means 'cherry blossom'...ah...get the picture now? :\**_

_**Anyway, *Glances away* be prepared, because Naruto and Sasuke are going to find out about a CERTAIN pairing in the next chapter. *Blinks and then glares at some random girls cooing about NaruSasu* And NO; it's not a yaoi pairing. *The girls sigh and sulk off while I smile* It's kind of an unlikely pairing...something I don't really like, but quite a few actually do like.**_

_**Before there's any questions asked; it's a Kakashi pairing. :)**_

_**Before readers ask, I will update once I find the time to. What's keeping me a little busy is college, writing drafts, and trying to find the time to check out some more anime that I might like. -.-**_

_**Read and review!**_


	4. A Visit From Kakashi! Part 1

_**Author's Note: I hope you're ready for some crazy and awkward moments; because that's what this entire story pretty much is. But hopefully, this two-parter won't be too crazy: because it involves a visit from Kakashi (obviously from the chapter title!)! And Naruto and Sasuke will discover a few Kakashi pairings...over-the-top dramatic fanfiction...and maybe even learn a little bit more about fanfiction.**_

_**But you'll just have to read to see. Two of the fanfictions that Naruto and Sasuke read were not written by me: they were written down on paper by my friend, Mackenzie (the one who likes incest), and one was written by myself; I just never posted it.**_

_**Really, I SHOULD be thanking Mackenzie...because she convinced me to continue this fic after the first chapter. Soooo...um...thanks; IF you're reading this! ^_^'**_

_**Anyway, enjoy the chapter I guess~! Btw, sorry for the OOC moments...**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, Acer laptops, DDR, Bleach (the ANIME!), Windex, the song SexyBack, or well...I don't own any of the real-life products and whatnot mentioned! -_-'**_

_**[XXXXX]**_

_**The Many Horrors of Fanfiction!:**_

_**Chapter Four: A Visit From Kakashi! Part 1**_

Naruto and Sasuke had no idea what was coming to them. Sure, they had seen quite a lot of traumatizing things in their lives, but they're slowly getting a taste of something that innocent eyes should _never_ see:

**Fanfiction.**

Having returned back to the village "for good", Sasuke (and Naruto) entered the home that once belonged to his parents. Of course; he hadn't SEEN it in a while. But the house looked like hell! So after a series of weird events, he decided to clean the entire place out with Naruto's help. That's when they discovered fanfiction.

And their fate was sealed.

Their **first impression** of it wasn't really all that bad. They had wandered around and randomly read a couple of funny drabbles for, the anime, Bleach. But...they involved two related characters accidentally getting set up on a date with each other. It was funny/shocking at the same time. Naruto, having an unhealthy obsession with incest, didn't mind that though. And the two discovered the (wonderful?) world of the pairing: ItaSasu, checking out some fanfiction with the two...together.

What could they possibly discover next?

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Sasuke's Old Home 6:00 AM-**

It was morning in the village. That was completely obvious. But what didn't fit was: Kakashi Hatake strolling through the village. Yeah...that was a little weird; because he usually stayed in for a LONG time. The fact that he was up early and walking through the village...that caused a couple of passing villagers to stare in bewilderment; they had always thought that Kakashi stayed in and read his Icha Icha books!

...But they were obviously wrong.

Kakashi knew exactly where he was going: to the Uchiha Residence. He had just got word the previous night that (by some stupid luck) his old student, Sasuke Uchiha, actually returned back to the village. The Hokage gave no details behind the whole story (because when she heard the story, she did an epic facepalm and ranted about how ridiculously **easy** that was), but he was stunned by that. To make sure that this all wasn't an elaborate evil plot on Sasuke's part, the old team's former sensei decided to..."visit" and see what was going on.

He arrived at the door and then quickly knocked on it a few times. But he got no answer.

"Huh...that's weird." Kakashi knocked again, this time louder, but there wasn't an answer. "Is he even here?"

Now Kakashi was slightly curious. He knew that he could have simply popped in without using the door ('ya gotta love those ninja skills in situations like that one!), but he smirked a little under the mask when a thought came to him: popping it wouldn't be fun. Hell, something could be going on in there after all. If he knocked on the door and went in the **old-fashioned/boring** way, he might be able to catch something comical going on.

Then he could at least be amused for a short time.

He was becoming a little annoyed by the fact that no one was answering the door. So he just put his hand over the doorknob and twisted it. And he really wasn't surprised by the fact that the door was **unlocked.** He just let himself in and then closed the door behind him.

He walked in...

He looked around...

And then Kakashi's visible eye widened as he examined the house in it's dirty, filthy, repulsive, ect, ect, ect, ect, state. It still looked like hell in there: dust was everywhere, furniture was turned over, cobwebs stretched across one wall to the other, old blood stains were visible on the floor, a huge bottle of bleach was deserted by the door (that briefly reminded Kakashi about the smutty Bleach fanfiction he was going to continue reading later that night), and he could have sworn he saw cockroaches scurry over the floors.

"What the hell happened to this place?" Kakashi wondered aloud. "I know it's been several years, but wouldn't the Hokage have sent someone to clean it out? God!"

He continued looking around, and that's when his blank eye randomly landed on a limp body on the floor. Zeroing in on it, he noted the blond spike heir, whisker marks, and the familiar orange pants he was wearing (he was originally wearing a the shirt but he discarded it after declaring that the house was "as hot as a frigging sauna" and just wore the black short-sleeved shirt underneath). Wait...that was Naruto! Naruto was lying on the floor, **weakly** moaning the words: "damn it..." over and over like a broken record.

Kakashi was shocked at the sight. What happened to him? And why was he there? WHERE was Sasuke? And why did he suddenly get a whiff of tomato juice for some random reason? Several questions swirled rapidly through Kakashi's head. He couldn't just leave Naruto like that; something awful must have happened!

"Naruto! What **happened**?" Kakashi demanded, dashing over to the scene. Naruto's barely-open reddened eyes weakly followed his movements.

"K-Kakashi-Sensei..."

Unfortunately, Kakashi dashed right past Naruto and to a crooked **picture** of the outside of a bamboo forest that was hanging on the wall. "This picture is _CROOKED_! What the hell happened?"

A sweatdrop somehow formed on Naruto's head as he heard those words. He weakly sat up by his elbows and rubbed his eyes. Kakashi frantically fixed the picture back, and then he heard Naruto try and clear his throat to get his attention. Now that the picture was fixed perfectly in place, Kakashi remembered his beat up former student on the floor. He ran to his side and got down and grabbed him by his shoulders.

"Naruto! Why are you here? What happened to you?" Kakashi asked, not sounding as shocked as he really was **inwardly.** "Tell me what happened..."

Naruto, although wincing from the burning sensation in his eyes, looked up at Kakashi's masked face. "K-K-Kakashi-Sensei...I...I...I..."

"Tell me what happened!"

Naruto weakly gestured over to the bottle of bleach by the door. "I...I was h-helping Sasuke clean his dump of a house...but...I accidentally got the bleach in my eyes..."

The stunned and concerned look in Kakashi's eye was immediately gone after he heard that explanation. He stared really, really, really, blankly for several seconds before releasing his grip on Naruto.

Only someone like Naruto would accidentally put bleach in his eyes, right? Well, Kakashi's shock died down and he inwardly sighed with relief, what with the fact that there was a **crooked picture** on the wall, that gave him the impression something tragic happened. However, he wasn't aware that Sasuke had bleached his eyes out the previous night as well; because the incest was severely getting to him. Traumatizing him easily.

"You accidentally got bleach in-" Kakashi cut himself off with a sigh as he realized he didn't want to know what happened. "Okay...why are you even here in the first place?"

"Because...Sasuke trapped me into helping him clean out this place so he can live in it again. But I-I don't know...he's traumatized by ItaSasu...and...oh my eyes are BURNING!"

Kakashi rolled his visible eye and then grabbed Naruto's shoulders. He helped him up to his feet and still found himself confused with what was happening. What he gathered so far was that Sasuke returns by some stupid luck, traps Naruto into helping him clean out his house, and then something about ItaSasu.

Wait.

ItaSasu? Kakashi recongized that as a fanfiction pairing he had come across in reading fanfiction! But how do Naruto and Sasuke know about it? Have they been checking out the...interestingly horrifying world of fanfiction?

Oh god, it's the beginning of mayhem!

"You should be alright, Naruto. But don't bleach your eyes out again..." Kakashi explained, feeling like he was talking to a three year old. "Now, where's Sasuke at?"

_**I'm bringing sexy back...**_

_**Them other boys don't know how to act...**_

_**I think you're special, what's behind your back?**_

_**So turn around and I'll pick up the slack...**_

_**Take 'em to the-**_

"WHY THE HELL DOES THIS STUPID SONG KEEP PLAYING WHEN I ENTER A ROOM?" Sasuke yelled upon entering the room; he had almost stumbled down the stairs from the burning sensation in his eyes and his sore muscles.

Cleaning the second floor, he noticed, would take even LONGER than the first floor. He discovered that the previous night. Sasuke had just fallen asleep in the floor and then he woke up just then to find out that Justin Timberlake must have been **stalking** him or something, since he kept hearing the "stupid song" **SexyBack** play over and over when he entered a room.

"Yeah...why? I heard Tenten mention that it was Kakashi-Sensei's theme song one time..." Naruto weakly mentioned, although even he was confused as to WHY that song was being played out of nowhere without evidence of how it was possible.

"I bleached my eyes out too hard last night-Kakashi? What's he doing here, Naruto?"

Naruto got up and gestured to their old sensei, who was confused about WHY they bleached their eyes out, and also WHY SexyBack kept playing in the background when Sasuke entered a room.

"I...er...came by here to visit. I heard you had returned, but I felt the need to be accurately positive about it." Kakashi explained.

Sasuke's eyes dramatically shifted back and forth, Naruto noticed that he almost looked exactly like he was plotting something. "What are you going to do, Kakashi? Use a **lie-detector** on me?"

"Sensei," Naruto cut in. "I'm sure he's back as long as this place gets cleaned out. We...uh...had to resort to TORTURE to bring 'em back anyway!"

"Oh...I can just imagine what torture that was." Kakashi muttered, not at all interested in finding out what happened.

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Iruka Umino's Home 6:18 AM-**

He had nothing to do at the moment...there was another teacher at the academy taking over his position for the day. Iruka found himself bored with the extra time on his hands. It wasn't like he believed he didn't need a day off from teaching the current academy students, it was **stressful** sometimes. He did need some rest, but what could he do around home?

Iruka glanced around, mentally naming off possible things he could do, to loosen up a little. Take a stroll around the village? No, that would much of a cliché and **way over-used** idea. Go out and eat? No, he just had breakfast. Practice his ninjutsu? ...Wait...he never had a reason to resort to violence! The last time he even got on the battle ground was a distant blur. There was...nothing really he could think of.

"_Wait...I can't be this BORING, can I?_" Iruka pondered. "_I need something to do...and I sold my DDR machine on Ebay to pay off that old expensive bill from Ichiraku's Naruto __**slipped**__ to me five years ago..._"

He continued to ponder. But it was extremely boring and random, so that all was skipped. Anyway, his brown eyes absentmindedly glanced over to the computer he had in his living room. Wait...the computer...maybe there was something he could do. An idea came to his mind; Iruka smiled slightly and walked over to it and sat down.

"I know something interesting I could do..."

He turned on his computer and then after waiting for what seemed like a century (because of the fact that he wouldn't get a **faster** internet service), he was on the internet to clicked to his favorite site of all time...

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Sasuke's Old Home 6:30 AM-**

"_**I'm bringing sexy back...them other fuckers don't know how to act-**_"

"Naruto if you continue to sing that song every time I make a movement, I'm going to **wring your neck**..."

Naruto gave Sasuke a disturbed look and then rolled his eyes. "I never get to have any fun..."

Kakashi had just then concluded that it was a bad idea for him to have even visited Sasuke and/or Naruto. He was currently leaning against a dusty, paint-chipped, leaky, ugly as hell, horror movie-styled, ect, ect, wall. While he did that, Sasuke and Naruto sat on the couch. But Naruto apparently loved annoying Sasuke by singing SexyBack over and over again; Kakashi was aware of his amused grin he wore afterward.

He could remember himself when he was younger on Team Minato: Rin had heard the song and, while looking like an aroused fangirl, dreamily commented that that song **was** Kakashi (she was actually the first one who came up with the of the idea of that!). Then Obito jokingly mentioned she was right, and begun to sing the song every time Kakashi entered a building or area, but it didn't work out too well...because Kakashi wasn't at all annoyed by that; he completely ignored it. And since he knew the Uchiha outcast shadowed him everyday rather obviously, he finally said something after a month. He pointed out that he was wasting all the time he could be using to train to become a worthy Uchiha. This, of course, meant that Obito got epically pwned.

But wait...this was no time for memory lane! Kakashi rolled his visible eye and then looked back over at his previous students.

"So...you're both working together to clean out this place?" Naruto and Sasuke nodded. "Good luck then. I only stopped by to make sure that Sasuke was certain he was setting aside his evil ways, but I suppose if we can keep a watchful eye on him, he won't be able to do anything TOO drastic. ...I'll go suggest to Lady Tsunade that she could send some experienced ANBU..."

Kakashi turned around and was about to make his leave. That was when Naruto stopped him by suddenly appearing by his side with a curious glint in his blue eyes.

"Kakashi-Sensei...what's your feelings about the thought of the fanfiction pairing ItaSasu?"

That question promptly gave Kakashi a headache. Underneath his mask, his expression couldn't have been more blank. "Oh...you're checking out fanfiction?"

"Yes...but this incest stuff is just creepy. And so is the fact that Sakura wrote a fanfiction about ME having to CROSSDRESS as a girl in some freaking weird-sounding 'boarding school'!" Sasuke ranted. "I mean, what the hell kind of plot idea is THAT? I wouldn't crossdress for anything! What IS a 'boarding school' anyway? And HOW could I fall in love with my...oh let's see...DEAD brother? God! WHAT happened to the-"

"I haven't actually read in ItaSasu in my years of reading fanfiction." Kakashi nonchalantly interrupted. He thought for a minute and shrugged his shoulders. "Personally, I think incest is kind of weird; but you'll be seeing quite a lot of that in the various fandoms, Sasuke. I HAVE...ah...**glanced** at some incest pieces before, but they were steamy ones about two sisters..."

Awkward silence kind of followed after Kakashi's last statement. Naruto, however, had a dreamy look in his eyes...oh...probably seeing really perverted yuri images in his mind. And Sasuke was just plain freaked out, he looked like a statue; and Kakashi briefly wondered if he had just unknowingly killed him.

"About Sakura's fanfiction...I've never really read hers. So I don't know what the hell you're talking about..."

"_What happened to this village's population? Does EVERYONE now have a very dirty mind? I DON'T KNOW THESE FREAKS ANYMORE! IS IT TOO LATE TO SNEAK OUT AND ESCAPE?_" Sasuke thought; continuing his rant while staring at Naruto who was letting his mind wander over to Sakura's fanfiction.

"Anyway, are you two sure you are prepared for what you might find in fanfiction?" Kakashi asked, as if he was talking about a serious subject.

Naruto and Sasuke exchanged looks and Kakashi sighed and grabbed the **Acer laptop** that was on the coffee table. He then opened it and got down on his knees, it went to the password screen and he sighed in annoyance.

"What's the password?"

A sweatdrop randomly appeared on Sasuke's head as he glanced away. "...**SexyNaruto**."

Kakashi then snorted the minute the words came out of Sasuke's mouth. And Naruto was sure he was about to start literally ROFL for a minute there. Unfortunately, the silver-haired jounin regained his composure and typed in the password.

So it accepted the password, he went to the wallpaper, blah, blah, blah, useless information, useless information, then he went to the internet and found the fanfiction site in the history section. However, he was surprised to see that under the un-named fanfiction site in the history were two Youtube videos: one was the official music video for **Allstar** by Smash Mouth, and the other was the official music video for **Love Stoned** by Justin Timberlake (why the hell is he mentioned so much anyway? Kakashi wanted to know that answer really badly). Anyway, he went to the fanfiction site and then randomly brought up a fanfic to show Naruto and Sasuke an example of the site's content.

"Come over here and read this." Kakashi ordered. Both walked over and leaned over his shoulders to see the fanfiction he had brought up. "This just might turn you off..."

Naruto glanced at the information above the page and decided to read it out loud for a dramatic affect. "I'm going to glance at the information above the page and read it out loud for a dramatic affect. Is that alright, Sensei?"

Kakashi rolled his visible eye as Naruto read it out loud like what was described...and mentioned.

"Wow! This sounds like an interesting one-shot!" Naruto commented, now grinning and gesturing to the screen. "It's called: **Bitter Lust**, and it's an AU romance/drama piece about Kakashi-Sensei and that weird Anko woman!"

"...Is that a pairing or something?" Sasuke randomly asked. Nobody cared about his annoying questions so there was no response and he took the silence as a 'yes'.

"Read this. Don't worry about me: I've read it before and...well, that's not important." Kakashi muttered the last part as he went on.

Naruto and Sasuke leaned a little closer and then read the part of the fanfiction Kakashi scrolled to:

_**[XXXXX]**_

"_Where the hell were you?" Anko hissed, whirling around angrily to face the silver-haired man who walked up to her. "I have been waiting for hours! It's fucking RAINING out here too!"_

_The man stepped into the light under the shady cafe's small rooftops. This man was probably Anko's age: maybe twenty-four. He was kind of tall and had gorgeous spiky silver hair that was getting wet from the rainstorm, hypnotizing dark eyes were visible, and the rest of his face was covered by his big coat collar. He wore a huge tan coat and and gray pants. Anko was a little surprised he had quite an interesting and different appearance; but his eyes were captivating her the most._

_She felt like those eyes would hypnotize her. Like they would take her to another world. Like...they would show her everything she wanted to know._

"_I'm sorry I was late." the man mentioned, extending his hand._

_Anko's eye twitched, she just outstretched her hand flicked his away. She was mad as hell at that point; the only reason she was agreeing to the date with Kakashi was because she was secretly against him, hoping to seduce him to the point of making him blind to her real motives. Where she could then strike: sneakily murder him and then claim the fortune she KNEW she should have received from their father._

_That's right. THEIR father. Sakumo Hatake was a very well-known business man around the shady town of Konoha. The man had a great fortune and said that of his offspring would inherit the fortune and the business. Kakashi was his son by blood, but Anko was adopted when she was only four. Anko furrowed her eyebrows together and remembered all that happened. Sakumo and their mother got divorced and the latter took Anko with her. She was only eleven at the time. However, Sakumo committed suicide not too long after that. Now that all the time has passed, it was discovered that their father wanted Kakashi to have the fortune and business; it pissed Anko off, now she wants nothing more than revenge. Her plan was pretty well-thought out and devious too: because she has changed so much over the years, from a tomboy-ish little girl to a beautiful woman. She was barely recognizable at all. And she knew Kakashi wouldn't be able to remember her as his adopted sister. They both worked together, but she just knew he couldn't recognize her._

_One thing that she would just have to try and forget was the intense feelings she had for Kakashi. Over the years, since they were thirteen and encountered in school once again; Kakashi not noticing her as his sister, she had developed feelings for him. It just turned to love overtime. And she hated that. She wanted to believe that she hated him. She was always getting pushed to the background, being ignored. It felt awful. She couldn't even tell her best friend, Iruka Umino, that. He would think that was incest or something; but it technically wasn't incest since they weren't related by blood._

"_Oh screw this!" muttered Anko, a quick rumble of thunder hitting her ears. "You should have been here sooner! Do you have ANY idea how LONG I've been waiting?"_

"_Just calm down." Kakashi grabbed her shoulders and brought her underneath the small roof of the cafe. The purple-haired woman shivered and let her hair down to wring it out. "You obviously don't give a damn about me anyway. Why would you stand out in the rain like that?"_

_In the middle of wringing out her hair, Anko sent a sharp glare at Kakashi. "How was I supposed to know you would make me wait this long? And besides, it wasn't raining when I showed up ON TIME."_

_Oh, Anko was so pissed at that moment. Kakashi noticed the venom in those words, although he didn't really know her as well as he wished he did: he knew she wasn't someone to piss off. But it really was her fault for not taking shelter when she noticed the storm start to pick up. Damn, she was just to stubborn sometimes._

"_You know...I don't think I'm interested in this 'date' anymore." Anko released her hair and then took off the thick wine-colored jacket she wore over her blouse. She continued to glare at him while she dried it out. "I'm going home. I was wrong about what our relationship could extend to..."_

"_Why would you want our relationship to go further anyway, Anko? You have always said that you couldn't stand me...so why did you agree to this? I want to know the truth."_

_Anko bit her lip, her blood was still boiling in anger. But seeing the look in Kakashi's amazing eyes made her heart beat erratically. She knew why she accepted the date in the first place. The strong feelings she wanted to bury deep down and forget about._

_But she couldn't tell him that._

_She could not bring herself to._

_And she knows those feelings will get in the way of what she desires: satisfying revenge._

"_You would never UNDERSTAND..." Anko hissed, walking closer to him and staring at him straight in the eyes. "I don't have to answer you! I don't have to say anything! Just because I want our relationship to go a little farther...the reason is none of your fucking business!"_

_Anko's eyes met Kakashi's eyes. Emotion: anger, lust, confusion, all was evident in the former's eyes. But Kakashi was unreadable because she could not see his expression underneath the high coat collar._

"_Anko..."_

"_It's all too complicated." Anko mentally slapped herself as she felt heat radiate off her cheeks. She turned around and then grabbed her jacket and slipped it back on. "And you don't need to know. ...Ugh...I'm going to go home..."_

_Maybe he would never understand._

_But he was curious about all that Anko just said._

_Kakashi didn't want her to leave just yet. The woman was hiding something. Something...something that was making her confused and stressed out. It couldn't be helped; he was curious about what she was hiding and her intentions. Before Anko could walk back out into the rain, he quickly grabbed her wrist and pulled her back to him._

"_Ah! Let go of me!" Anko yelped, being pulled back over to Kakashi. His admirable strength was hard to counter and she couldn't pull away._

_To her bewilderment, Kakashi released her wrist after only four seconds. He placed his arms on her shoulders and walked a little closer to her; the distance between them getting closed in a matter of seconds._

"_K-Kakashi?" Anko swallowed a lump in her throat and her eyes widened at how close they were. The moment wasn't right at all; SHE was supposed to be the one to seduce him. However, he was pretty much seducing her. And damn it, it was working well. Her knees were getting more and more weaker._

"_...Tell me what's REALLY going on."_

_Anko, despite being absolutely caught off guard for a change, found the strength to shake her head 'no'. And that only made Kakashi take one hand and lower his coat collar to his chin. Now seeing his whole face, she blushed majorly when she noticed how sexy he looked. That didn't help anything at all; she was just more and more ready to fall to the cold ground unconscious._

_She was never used to people being so close to her: not even when she was a child. But looking back...that might have been because she was raped by a mysterious man with sickly pale skin and jet-black hair when she was eleven._

"_I-I-I...d-dammit, get away from me..." Anko words were just getting quieter and quieter._

"_If you won't talk, I will. Anko, I've always had feelings for you; you're very different yet never cease to interest me. I know when something's wrong with you, but I know you're too stubborn to admit when you're in a tough situation." Kakashi kept his firm grip on her shoulders. Aware of the fact that she was no weakling and could slip away._

"_W-well...I can't tell you what's going on." Stated Anko. "Anyway, how am I supposed to believe you have romantic feelings for me? When do you ever show it? NEVER."_

"_I never show any emotion. I am fine with being calm and nonchalant. I believe love can only interfere with your life; it blinds you and can turn against you in the blink of an eye. I tried for a long time...to bury these feelings deep down but I guess that's IMPOSSIBLE now..."_

_Anko, although she didn't show it, was stunned at that moment. But she wanted to get away. Get away from him and all her problems. Sure it was like a dream come true: Kakashi actually felt the same way...but this just wasn't right. She wanted to believe she hated him. She wanted to believe she wanted him out of her life and that she didn't need him. But most of all, she wanted to believe revenge was all she needed to get over the past and try a second chance at life._

_But she couldn't let him go._

_Suddenly, in a swift motion, Kakashi leaned in to her and pressed his lips to hers. Anko was pretty much paralyzed at the moment. It took her forever to register what was happening in her mind, but she did: Kakashi. Hatake. Was. Kissing. HER. It felt so strange...enjoyable...sensational...warm... she eventually just gave up and slipped her arms around his neck when she had regained control of herself. And she kissed back; but harder._

_Nothing around them mattered at the moment. It was just them. Anko enjoyed the taste of him, although his lips were cold. She melted into the moment quite fast, a few moans escaping her mouth every now and then._

_Somehow, they absentmindedly had wandered to the alley behind the cafe. Once there, the rain drenched them, but they didn't care at all. Anko had backed up to the wall and took advantage of the moment to slip her tongue inside his mouth. Hey, she was known to be kind of wild. But Kakashi didn't mind; their tongues wrestled, Anko lost though. But she brought her legs up around Kakashi and reached for his coat-_

_**[XXXXX]**_

"**OH MY GOD!**" Naruto screeched indignantly as Kakashi scrolled down a little more and Naruto saw the **rest**. "**MY EYES! MY EYES! TAKE IT AWAY! **_**STRAIGHT PEOPLE HAVING SEX**_**! IT BURNS!**"

Naruto then fell backwards with a loud **THUD**. But nobody really cared at the moment, so they ignored him.

"What the hell? People actually write THIS kind of stuff?" Sasuke asked, gesturing to the screen at the more explicit parts below. "HOW does this not get noticed? What about kids that see this stuff?"

"Think of it as...free porn?"

"THAT'S JUST SICK!"

"Blame the author Sasuke, blame the author." Kakashi mentioned. "By the way, I can tell by this author's name...Iruka wrote this."

Naruto, who had regained consciousness and was back by Kakashi's side, stared with a "WTF?" expression.

"IRUKA-SENSEI WROTE _THIS_?" Naruto screamed. Kakashi and Sasuke stared at him. And then he paled dramatically. "Where the hell have I been WASTING my life? His fanfiction is freakin' genius! I so HAVE to see more of his work, but hopefully it's not about straight people!"

Sasuke gave Naruto a strange look. There was one thing he really didn't understand. "What do you have against a straight couple, Naruto?"

Naruto just shook his head.

"I don't know, honestly. The thought of that...it just never seemed appealing to ever read about."

Sasuke just stared really, really, really blankly. And Kakashi clicked off the internet and closed the laptop.

_**Continued.**_

_**[XXXXX]**_

_**...Yes...I don't know what that was. -_-' This two-parter might be extremely strange, but I hope someone liked it anyway! I honestly have an interesting time when writing a new chapter to this fic: it's weird yet fun and random.**_

_**So...Naruto and Sasuke discovered the couple: KakashixAnko! Next, they will discover KakashixSakura and Kakashi/Naruto! ;) Yeah...it's going to be very awkward.**_

_**The fanfiction about Kakashi and Anko ISN'T my work. *Smiles* My friend Mackenzie writes fanfiction down on paper. Bitter Lust is actually one of her pieces; and she gave me permission to use a section of it as a fanfiction that Naruto and Sasuke read to discover KakashixAnko. And yes...she loves that pairing, and the fanfiction itself IS actually explicit beyond the point I cut it off at. ^^'**_

_**Oh, and the scene with Kakashi entering the house and seeing Naruto on the floor in pain and then really being worried over a crooked picture was a parody of a scene in the Spongebob Squarepants episode: Have You Seen This Snail?. I thought it would be interesting to do that. ;)**_

_**Well anyway, I'm not sure when I'll be able to update. Hopefully soon: I want to add the next part pretty soon and get it out of the way. Rushing me won't do any good either.**_

_**Merry Christmas and all! Read and review!**_


	5. A Visit From Kakashi! Part 2

_**Author's Note: For once...I don't really have any comments about the chapter. O.o It's...kind of weird feeling.**_

_**So since I got nothing to say, let me just mention a few things in advance: First things first, this is the second part to Kakashi's visit. Naruto and Sasuke actually discover the two Kakashi pairings KakashixSakura and Kakashi/Naruto. ^^ It's going to be kind of awkward, and there's definitely a lot of Sasuke torture included as well. And there's another appearance by Zetsu, Iruka, and briefly Sakura again. I'm not...responsible for what mayhem that might unfold in this chapter. *Awkward silence lingers and I sigh* ...OKAAAAY...maybe I AM. -_-'**_

_**Beware of OOC moments, Sasuke torture, more heavily implied NaruSasu moments, a little Sakura and Zetsu bashing, and the many references to Justin Timberlake and his songs!**_

_**I also should mention this: Naruto and Sasuke check out at least two different fanfiction in this part; **_**Yours ****_(Some random ItaAnko fic "written" by Iruka), and _Tonight's The Night!_ (The Kakashi/Naruto fanfic) But _Yours_ and _Tonight's The Night! _Are two fanfics written by my friend, Mackenzie, on paper. Once again, she gave me the permission to include them. I have to say "thank you" once again, because if I didn't get to include her (surprisingly good) fanfiction, I would have a boring fic and she would get no other people to see how well she writes. :)_**

_**Wait...I just made the note longer than I planned. -_-' Anyway, enjoy the chapter! Don't forget to review either! *Winks***_

_**[XXXXX]**_

_**The Many Horrors of Fanfiction!**_

_**Chapter Five(?): A Visit From Kakashi! Part 2**_

Just when it seemed like everything was about to calm down, things just got more and more complicated for Naruto Uzumaki.

He had joined up with three other trusted friends(?) and had tracked down Sasuke Uchiha, torturing him with a very convincing steamy yaoi scene. It did work, surprisingly, he agreed to give up being evil and come back home. Of course, nothing ever works out perfectly in the ways you want them to: upon returning back to his old home, the two were met with the most filthiest building they had ever seen in their entire 17 years of living. And **this happened**, **that happened**, and Sasuke somehow tricked the blond ninja into helping him clean out the entire place.

Or did he just want the **company** of someone...?

...Moving on. Moving on now: so then the two accidentally discovered the shocking world of fanfiction! Now that they have discovered Sakura was an authoress and wrote a lot about ItaSasu and other dirty pairings such as that, they will get even more "surprises" now that their old sensei, Kakashi Hatake, has dropped by, anything could happen!

...God, help us all...

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Sasuke's Old Home 6:42 AM-**

"WHERE THE HELL IS THAT _BLEACH_?" Naruto randomly shouted as he looked around frantically. "MY EYES! IT STILL BURNS!"

From where he was leaning against the extremely dusty wall, Kakashi sighed. He didn't realize that Naruto would react that badly to some completely made-up pairing! It wasn't real...he never thought of Anko that way, but had strangely found himself wondering if she was good in bed after he had read the fanfiction for the first time.

Anyway, Naruto's spasm episode was cut short by a slightly-traumatized Sasuke delivering a quick punch to the back of his head. The sudden attack was too much and Naruto fell to the floor with a loud echoing **THUD.**

"...Thanks..."

"Don't mention it." Sasuke rubbed his wrist and then looked away, cracking his knuckles. "That really did feel good."

Naruto got up off the floor as if nothing weird ever happened. He spit out a lot of dust and then sneezed, before he whipped his nose and then walked over to his shirt that was still laying across the back of the couch.

"Well, anyway, I need to be getting home and all. I'm starving to death, I didn't get to eat any supper last night because of attempting to clean out this filthy dump..." Naruto slipped back on the shirt and walked over to the door before giving Sasuke and Kakashi a quick wave goodbye. "See you guys later!"

Naruto opened the door, but upon opening it, he immediately was met with another person's face. The thing was: this 'person' looked oddly **plant-ish** and had two split sides. A shady thing about him was that he was also wearing an Akatsuki cloak.

He was Zetsu, duh. But Naruto didn't know that at first. In fact, he wasn't shocked by the fact that he had a weird plant/human "hybrid" thing at the door. Of course not, he just shot him his foxy grin.

Kakashi and Sasuke, however, took notice to the creature(?)'s appearance and looked over Naruto's shoulders with "WTF?" looks.

"What's up?" Naruto greeted, not at all caught off-guard by Zetsu's second appearance. "You're looking pretty...well...today, man!"

"Naruto, he's wearing an **Akatsuki cloak**..." Kakashi informed as he put hand on Naruto's shoulder. "Don't you find this a little SUSPICIOUS at all?"

"**I knew this would fail...you're plans SUCK, Zetsu...**"

"Zetsu! It was not at all my fault, you had as much to do with this as I have!"

"**Dumbass...you should have realized sooner that we'd get caught! 'OH! ZETSU~! Let us stupidly blow our cover by using the FRONT DOOR~!' I just knew it wouldn't work...**"

"SHUT UP! I CAN NOT STAND TO HEAR YOU ANYMORE!"

"**OH, I'LL JUST BE LOUDER THEN!**"

"YOU ARE TRULY AN ANNOYING JACKASS!"

"**Yeah...well, right back at 'ya then!**"

Naruto, Sasuke, and Kakashi all just stared at Zetsu. Each wore a very convincing "WTF?" kind of expression. But...Zetsu just continued to argue with himself. And he completely forgot why he/they even came to the house in the first place.

Kakashi promptly slammed the door, and then when Zetsu noticed he had just gotten locked out, he walked away and continued the argument for god knows how long...

"Ah...that was weird." Sasuke commented. He sighed and then he glanced back at Naruto. "Seriously, who the hell is that plant guy and how come he keeps stalking us?"

"Who knows?" Naruto shrugged his shoulders. "I just know that I'm exhausted from trying to clean out this dump. I'm gonna go out to Ichiraku's and get some ramen...then I might go home and look up some more of Iruka-Sensei's fanfiction!"

"Well, I'm leaving too."

Sasuke looked over at Kakashi, just as he disappeared leaving behind a puff of smoke. Shaking his head, the Uchiha walked over to the door that Naruto had just opened and was leaving.

"Naruto, we barely got started with cleaning this place. And I can't live here with it in this state...so...I've been thinking about Sakura's suggestion, and is it alright if I stay at your place until we can clean this 'dump' out?"

Wow...Naruto couldn't believe that Sasuke actually had been considering Sakura's suggestion. That was just weird. And besides, Sakura probably only wanted the two to get together. Naruto rolled his eyes. That was the only reason why she had suggested that.

Stupid yaoi fangirls...

But, Naruto looked into Sasuke's eyes to find any trace of hidden emotion that wasn't shown on his face. It took several seconds, but he did find a hint of something that he never once thought he'd find.

**Hope.**

Well, Sasuke WOULD need somewhere to stay. But Naruto doubted that Tsunade would allow him to stay with Naruto for a little while, and going to get permission from her would be a big fat waste of time! The sake Shizune had imported from some other nation probably wouldn't arrive for another few weeks. It would not be a good idea to even speak a word to the hokage...she might accidentally murder that poor, poor soul.

But maybe Tsunade wouldn't have to **know** about it...?

"Sasuke," Naruto paused to sigh and then put a hand behind his head. "I guess...I guess you COULD stay with me for however long it takes to clean out this dump of a house. But let's not tell Granny about this, I once overheard her saying to Sakura that she **hated** the idea of two guys that are -possibly- gay living together...totally against it...that's why she nearly had a heart attack when she accidentally discovered a fanfiction written by Ino that was about you and Kakashi as **lovers**."

Sasuke blinked. "But...I won't be permanently staying there, Naruto."

"Yeah, I know that...but ugh! I'm just friggin' SICK of almost everyone believing we're in some kind of relationship BEYOND a friendship!"

"...You were extremely determined to bring me back to this village for years, Naruto."

"That doesn't mean anything!" Naruto protested hysterically, a sweatdrop appearing on his head as if they were inside a manga or some other thing breaking the fourth wall like that...

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Ichiraku Ramen Bar 7:13 AM-**

"_I hope the fanfiction gets some sort of attention. It's...uh...not one of my best compared to _**Bitter Lust **_of course. But I did work hard during my abnormally long free time..._" Iruka thought as he put his chopsticks into the bowl of steamy ramen. The wet, warm noodles wrapped around the sticks and he paused his thoughts to take a bite. "_I hope my fanfiction does continue to do well. I don't have much time to update and write because of teaching the new students at the ninja academy and all..._"

Iruka Umino had just finished writing a fanfiction one-shot, he thought he should then get some food anyway to try and get his mind going again. He was determined to write the next four chapters in one day before going back to the ninja academy to...well obviously...teach the students.

"So...Iruka, how's it going with your fanfiction?"

The question got Iruka's attention and he looked up at the aged old owner of the place. Something of a small smile was evident on Iruka's face as he swallowed the food and still held the chopsticks, tapping the noodles and whatnot in the bowl.

"Fairly well. I've only written four so far, but **Bitter Lust**is the one currently getting a lot of praise and interesting criticism." Ayame, in the background adding some seasoning to the cooking ramen, promptly rolled her eyes. She had read the fanfiction herself after all, but noted that it was only popular because it was a **lemon**. And, no, not the fruit... "And now that we're on to that subject, I found it difficult to write that..."

"Is it because you still can't get a girlfriend...or ANY young woman to sleep with you?"

Iruka's face flushed in barely three seconds. In the background, Ayame mouthed the words: "Don't answer father's question, he's too freaking nosy for his own good!"

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Some Unknown Amount Of Time Later At Naruto's Place-**

Naruto and Sasuke both entered Naruto's place. In comparison to Sasuke's, the house looked a hell of a lot better! But it wasn't the tidiest place you'd ever see, it was disorganized and mixed up. Sasuke's eyes had also seen random ninja tools along the floors, instant ramen cups towering in a trash can, books along the coffee table in the living, ect.

Yet, he silently did admit that he could still stay there while they cleaned out the Uchiha's old home. There was no telling how long though. But, oh well. Maybe Sakura was actually right for one rare occasion...the two could get "re-acquainted" with each other. As Sasuke walked along the cluttered floors of the hall, he also couldn't help but wonder if the **fake** hope he had used in his eyes had been what convinced Naruto to let him stay...

"Dammit! I'm getting this terrible deja vu feeling!"

Sasuke sighed and glanced behind his shoulder at Naruto once again struggling to drag the "100,000 lbs" into the hall. And just like what Naruto had mentioned, he was actually reliving the terrible experience. He felt this evil urge to burn the damn hair products straight to ashes...but decided against that because Sasuke would be pissed off about that.

Naruto was too exhausted to put up with Sasuke freaking out about him burning his "precious" hair products.

"...Uh...you can drop them there." Sasuke muttered, gesturing to the couch from the open screen he was standing by. He actually felt a little...bad...for Naruto having to carry all that. But, hey, that couldn't be helped! He couldn't risk losing his badass looks!

"THANK GOD!"

Naruto promptly took the suitcase and threw it into the living room. It, amazingly, landed right beside the couch. It didn't even fall through the floor from the weight colliding with it. So Naruto then walked into the room impatiently dragging Saske by his shirt collar with him.

"I don't have any extra bedrooms...so you'll have to sleep on the couch." Naruto informed, glancing around the room and making different gestures to whatever he was talking about. Sasuke listened closely, soaking up all the information as if we were a sponge. "And, Sasuke, I'd like to make a few things clear: don't let anyone know you're staying here or they'll get the WRONG idea! And feel free to help yourself to meals and entertainment. Oh, and you'll have plenty of times to have the bathroom all to yourself because I don't showers as much as I should..."

Sasuke made some kind of disgusted face at the last part and cautiously took a few steps back from where he was standing close to Naruto. But nevertheless, he agreed with the "information" his old teammate; **temporary-roommate **was giving him.

"I understand. So..." Sasuke walked over to the suitcase, placed it on the coffee table, and started going through it. "I guess I'll start setting things up. And, tonight at four-thirty, we'll both head over to the Uchiha compound and get back to cleaning it out again."

"That sounds...reasonable." Naruto had sighed and then walked out of the room. His voice could be heard through the closed screen as he walked away. "Anyway, I'm goin' out to get some ramen! See you later!"

And so, Sasuke started going through his suitcase and getting things out. In over thirty minutes, he had all of his hair products in the bathroom and various clothing were neatly placed in a bare closet he discovered in Naruto's living room. As he had walked out of the stuffy closet and then sat down on the couch, resting his feet up on the coffee table, pulled out his **Acer Laptop**, he realized one thing.

He actually felt comfortable at Naruto's place.

Too bad, he noted as he turned on the laptop and went online to the fanfiction site, he'd only be living there for a short time until the duo could clean out the entire dirty place. Wait...why was he thinking this?

Only when Sasuke had brought up the internet history and accidentally click the third link that was in the section did he bring himself from his thoughts. It happened when a familiar/ANNOYING music started playing from a **Youtube **video.

"_**I'm bringing sexy back, those other-**_"

"No way in hell am I going to listen to this." Sasuke scowled and clicked the other link above that one on the history section just as Justin Timberlake's "stupid song" raped his ears. The other link brought him to the familiar fanfiction site. "Let's see what else is on this fanfiction site...maybe it's not ALL about incest between me and Itachi. Sakura did mention that the couples could other be gay or straight..."

So, Sasuke arrived at the fanfiction site. And since he had no clue whatsoever about how to get around, he just put whatever words came to mind in the search box and hoped something like that in a fanfic would show up.

...He put Itachi's name and the words 'yours', and 'why' in the search box before going through with it.

He came back with over ten fanfics. Five were about him and Itachi, two were about Itachi himself, two more were about Itachi and some stupid OC who sounded too unrealistic from the summary, and of course: the last was about Itachi and _Anko_.

Interested by the summary that gave no important detail, just a little smiley face that looked like this ':D' with the words 'ItaAnko Lemon included'. And...because Sasuke didn't know what 'lemon' meant, he assumed that whoever wrote this story must have either been on crack or just plain stupid to mention random words and a face. He hovered over the title called **Yours**, and clicked it.

"_Now who wrote this...? Hmm...god, that's obvious! The author's name is _**Your Instructor**_. Obviously, this was written by IRUKA._" Sasuke thought. He rolled his eyes at the simply obvious name Iruka gave himself.

The fanfiction was a romance/drama piece. And, no, Sasuke wasn't reading it for the romance. He was only reading it because he was curious about the weird pairing and what it might be about. Since there was truly no summary other than the stupid face and the word 'lemon'. He shrugged his shoulders and scrolled down to a random part of the one-shot. But...he stopped immediately and started reading when he caught sight of something...

_**[XXXXX]**_

"_Hold it right there!" Was Anko's barely muffled reply through the door. "I am still talking to you, Uchiha! I still have a LOT to say here!"_

_Furiously, Anko was knocking on the door. Her fists collided with the wood violently, and she could feel pain through her knuckles. Yet, she would not stop. Not until she gave him a piece of her mind for what he had just done and said to her._

"_OPEN THE DOOR! SO HELP ME, I'LL BREAK IT DOWN!"_

"_Just try it. I don't want to talk about this."_

"_Well, if you won't talk, this gives me the opportunity to yell at you! I'm serious, you aren't shutting me out just yet! I have a lot to say!"_

_She continued pounding the shit out of the door. But it was pointless. Itachi didn't once say anything after his last statement and never did allow her into his bedroom. Anko didn't give up. She continued with all her might until the door would at least give in and collapse._

_What she had just learned from him was totally unforgivable. Here she was, welcoming him into her home with open arms after finding him sick and weak in the dark alleys of the town, taking care of him until he could at least get back up on his feet, and she even tried her hardest to get him to open up to her. Itachi was very emotionless and seemed to be very cold-hearted at first glance, that was what the purple-haired young woman knew. But as she gave him a place to stay at her home and started trying to get him to open up to her and explain some things about him: past, family, friends, occupation, interests, she did think that he was actually a good person...on the inside. During the nine months the mysterious man had been secretly staying at her home, Anko had barely even found anything out about him. He barely talked to her. And yet, she had felt some attraction to him. Perhaps it was because she felt like somehow...although they hadn't met before...she was meant to be with him._

_But Anko scoffed in the present as she noted that. Looking back, it was utterly pathetic of her to have believed that. Now, she had no reason to believe anything._

_For a long time, trying to get information and emotion from the sickly mysterious man staying with her, Anko had found herself falling for him...but she had no idea why. And her being herself, she certainly did not want to admit she was in love with him. The only things she knew of him was that his name was Itachi, he was twenty one, and that he had 'ran away from his past life' or whatever! She couldn't be falling in love...no it wasn't possible..._

"_OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR, DAMMIT!"_

_Anko eventually started panting as her throat was getting very dry and hoarse from her extremely loud hollers and pleas. Her punching the strong wooden door died down and she lost it. She lost her grip on the door and her pale and bruised fists slid off as she slid to the floor on her knees. She shut her eyes tightly, refusing to let the tears she felt coming on overflow._

"_J-just listen to me...I only want an ex-explanation..." Cried Anko as she took the back of her hand and wiped her moist eyes. "I just want to know...how you could...h-how you could have not TOLD me any of that! And how you pretty much used me all this time, when I had thought I was finally helping someone!"_

_She couldn't believe she was crying. Choked sobs came out as she stopped talking all together. She still received no reply; she might as well be stating all that to an inanimate object. The tears ran down her eyes and hit the floor as she self-consciously tried to wipe them all away._

_All Anko knew at the moment was that she was enraged, sad, and stunned by what she had just found out about Itachi. She felt used...like all the stuff she had done to help him was for nothing when he could have let her know before that she would be wasting time..._

_In just ten minutes, ten god-awful minutes, she had found out a lot of things about the man when he had sat her down on the living room sofa and explained everything about him. She found out that his last name was 'Uchiha'. He was the oldest son of the well-known family in town that kept the town alive with the way Fugaku and Mikoto Uchiha pretty much ran the place. Since the town was small...and there was pretty much no government at all. Itachi had apparently just lost it, and killed them and his entire family before running away. And had spent the next few years in hiding in a crowed city far away from the town. There, he had realized that he had some kind of problems due to the fact that he had this overpowering urge to slaughter the most random people in his sight. Later, he had carefully sneaked onto a plane that was headed back for the city. He got off in the city and had taken shelter in an alley when a rough thunderstorm had struck in his incurable disease had taken it's toll. That was when Anko had heard his strangled moans of pain and helped him._

_What made Anko enraged, sad, and stunned the most was that she had allowed him to stay there secretly in her home for the past months and he never once told her that he was some kind of mental murderer, had an incurable disease that she was wasting her time trying to help, or that he had planned to take advantage of SOMEONE in order to get a place to stay at. He was already aware that he had no money to get himself a decent place. It was unexplainable, but she felt like she was technically used by him. Maybe she did love him after all. Maybe that was why she was stunned to find this out?_

_Anko continued to cry. She cursed herself though. It felt terrible, she felt weak and sick in this rare state. No more than a few seconds later, her ears had picked up the sound of thunder loudly rumbling outside. But, along with that, she had also heard Itachi muttering something._

"_I'm still here waiting! Answer me, damn it, an-answer!"_

_She opened her eyes as she heard the door slowly open. But her vision was blurred from the tears. It happened in a swift and shocking way, strong hands grabbed her shoulders and pulled her up to her feet, that's when her eyes met and locked in on a pair of dark emotionless ones._

"_Anko..."_

_**[XXXXX]**_

"Blech...the scene's becoming way too mushy and overly-dramatic..." Sasuke announced as he started scrolling down a little past.

He immediately stopped scrolling and started reading when he noticed this scene didn't have much dialogue. Curiously, he started reading it. But he soon regretted doing so...

_**[XXXXX]**_

"_Y-you're in love with me? Is that what you're trying to say? That's why you didn't tell me this?" Anko furrowed her eyebrows together and tried to slip out of Itachi's strong hold. It was too difficult to and she found herself just being pulled back. "Well if you really are in love with me like I am with you, then you'll PROVE it to me! I don't believe you! You think you can just play with my emo-"_

_Anko was forcefully cut off when a pair of lips crashed onto hers. She stared, in complete shock, for what seemed to have been a lot of seconds. Finally it clicked: Itachi had just kissed her._

_Itachi had just kissed her..._

_The realization sent her face aflame and she found herself speechless for once in her life. She hated it when Itachi had broke it and pulled away. She stared into his eyes, hinting for more by licking her lips in a sexy manner._

_Something of a smirk flashed over Itachi's face. Somehow, reading her body language, he could tell that she was starting to get into the moment fast. But that was okay. He himself was getting a little lost too, instincts merely taking over; he lied her down and his purple-haired 'roommate' barely showed any complaints._

"_Oh, I can't believe I'm actually falling for this..." Anko thought, that was actually her last thought before Itachi leaned in and kissed her again...but with a little more passion in it._

_The seconds ticking by, the candles in the dark room flickering, the sudden heat wave in the room, the feeling of strong desire, Anko felt like she was about to have a pretty good time. Not that she was inexperienced or anything, but it HAS been a while since she had done it. All thoughts kind of flew away out of her mind and reality came back when she felt something suddenly poke her._

_Her face reddened ten fold as she had glanced over and realized. But, nevertheless, she gave in._

_Clothes flew afterward only to lay forgotten in the floor. Now that that was out of the way, Itachi had climbed over anko and she immediately gave him entrance-_

_**[XXXXX]**_

Sasuke's eyes widened as he continued reading beyond that part. He immediately sweatdropped and clicked back a page to the search box. Out of nowhere, the shocked 17 year old voiced his thoughts about the whole...interesting scene he just read.

"Wow...that was graphic. And when the hell did Iruka become such a pervert? I DOUBT Anko's breasts are that huge! And since when is Itachi any good in bed? How would Iruka know whether or not Itachi was that experienced? What is he? A stalker?"

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Somewhere With Kakashi Hatake 8:50 AM-**

"I forgot to warn Naruto about what else he might find while checking out fanfiction." Kakashi rambled to mostly himself as he walked up to the orange ninja's house. "Oh well, better late than never."

So Kakashi walked up to the door. He glanced around for seemingly no reason at all. He was actually taking in reality for s few moments: you see, he, like EVERYONE else in the entire village and maybe even the entire landscape itself, was stunned that Sasuke returned. Not like there was anything bad about that fact, but it just seemed real shady and unrealistic. ...It was unrealistic that Sasuke Uchiha would hate yaoi. Seriously. Kakashi always thought of Sasuke as, well, he assumed he would someday start to 'swing that way'. He was never interested in the local (cough and annoying cough) young girls. He basically was gay...always being around Naruto quite a lot.

And over the years since he was gone, rumors arose all around about both rivals/friends/old teammates/cliche examples of love-hate relationships. Most of them hinting (and HEAVILY IMPLYING!) that they were crazy about each other. Hence, the way Sasuke never actually killed Naruto off and Naruto kept running back to him. Not to mention the fact that Yamato once reported to Kakashi that he had overheard Naruto moaning Sasuke's name in his sleep one night while camping out for some stupid mission about returning a glass relic.

But, my friends, is another story for another time.

Anyway, Kakashi knocked on the door. However, he stopped himself from doing it a third time because he realized the door was unlocked.

Sometimes...Naruto was **forgetful.**

"I'm just going to walk right in. It's not like there's anything **weird** in there; I've seen the inside of Naruto's apartment at least a dozen times."

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Naruto Uzumaki's Home 9:01 AM-**

Naruto's home wasn't big. But was liveable for one person. Kakashi wandered the rather empty hall and then he came to a fork in it. The one to the left led to the kitchen which was visible because the paper screen was half-open. The right led to the living room, but that screen was closed.

Kakashi walked up to the closed screen but immediately froze comically as music playing the middle of a song hit his ears. That was just plain weird: because Naruto didn't own any radios, but he did own an MP3 player that he almost always carried in his pocket (incase a fight broke out and he needed some awesome music playing in the background to pump him up). This music sounded extremely familiar, and he noted right away who the singer was and the song.

_**Come here girl...**_

_**Go ahead, be gone with it...**_

_**Come to the back...**_

_**Go ahead, be gone with it...**_

_**V.I.P.**_

_**Go ahead, be gone with it...**_

_**Drinks on me-**_

"Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! JUST SHUT THE HELL UP! THE DRINKS AREN'T ON _ANYBODY_!"

That voice was obviously Sasuke's, Kakashi noted as he rubbed his masked chin, and the music coming from nowhere just paused. He then heard Sasuke sigh in contentment, probably content with the relaxing silence.

Wait...why was Sasuke in Naruto's house? Wasn't he staying in the old dump that once belonged to his parents?

Kakashi knew exactly what to do in situations similar to that one: he opened the screen and stepped in without asking questions. Besides, it was fun barging in. Who needs to ask questions or knock when you're a skilled ninja?

So Kakashi greeted Sasuke nonchalantly as soon as he stepped in, and Sasuke gasped from the sudden appearance and nearly threw the laptop off his lap in shock. While the masked jounin glanced around in the coolest way possible, Sasuke panted and set the laptop off to the side of the couch. He finally caught his breath and gave the visitor a glare.

"Eh...sorry for barging in. I was here to inform Naruto about something important before he discovered it and freaked out." Kakashi explained while Sasuke glared. "I didn't expect you to be here...is Naruto here too?"

"He went out to get ramen a long time ago. I honestly don't know when he's coming back..." Sasuke replied. He got up off the couch and walked over to a brown end table that was in the corner of the room, he picked up a can of soda that was left on it and took a sip before talking again. "I'm kind of busy at the moment...trying to get a mental image out of my mind...so if you could just tell me what you were gonna tell him, I can just repeat it when he returns."

"Fine. I guess explaining it to you would be easier anyway."

Both walked over to the couch and sat down. And since there was this uncomfortable silence, Sasuke just leaned back against the couch and closed his eyes; that's when Kakashi inquired him about something completely off-topic.

"Why are you here anyway?"

Sasuke's eyes flickered open and he stared down at the coffee table by the couch. He was mentally figuring out how exactly he could lie to him. It would have to be a very thought-out and believable one, Kakashi was so damn good at seeing right through pathetic lies after all. Not to mention that the older shinobi was also getting suspicious by Sasuke's body language.

"_I can't tell him the real reason why I'm temporarily staying here. Kakashi's a sly one...he will most __likely get a WAY DIFFERENT impression of the situation. God, the last thing I want is for even him to start believing I'm utterly falling head over heals for the knucklehead._" Sasuke glanced at Kakashi from the corner of his eyes and sighed, rubbing his temples briefly. "_And, anyway, what makes these idiots think I love him...? That...that's unlikely...damn it, I'm confused now!_"

"Well...I'm only here to pick up my...laptop. Yes, Naruto was stupid enough to forget the laptop wasn't his own. And I am leaving shortly; I'm just resting here while I think of ways to reveal that Justin Timberlake IS **stalking** me and singing his stupid song."

Kakashi just stared blankly at Sasuke. The latter could feel a sweatdrop beginning to form on his head and he gave himself a nice mental facepalm.

Because he would look even more stupid if he literally gave himself one.

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Sometime Later-**

"Okay, now let me explain these pairings to you."

Sasuke nodded, signaling for Kakashi to continue. For ten LONG minutes, the Uchiha was worried that his old sensei had seen through his utterly pathetic lie. It seemed that way until he just completely changed the subject altogether. When changing the subject, Kakashi had brought up fanfiction pairings: asking Sasuke if he had seen the teacher/student pairings **KakaSaku**, **KakaNaru**, or **KakaSasu**.

Sadly, Sasuke had heard of 'KakaSasu', but not the other two. When he told that to Kakashi, Kakashi sighed deeply and then started to explain the other two pairings. He went into detail, a lot of detail, because he had very good sources of information (Cough Iruka Cough).

Needless to say: Sasuke was definitely disgusted when the explanation was over. To him, all three pairings seemed totally wrong. Even IF the authors had changed the ages around for the plot, it still felt wrong. It gave off the vibe that Kakashi was a pedophile or something.

"So that's the idea behind it. I know what you're thinking, it IS kinda wrong." Kakashi finished in an amused tone. Honestly, he was a little amused by Sasuke's blank look with his right eye twitching every four seconds. "Now then, I'll show you an example. Oh, and don't forget to tell Naruto about this too; showing these fanfiction pieces will do the trick."

At a fast speed, Kakashi took the laptop keyboard. It was pretty impressive; it was all a blur and it didn't even look like his fingers were even hitting them. Sasuke was so distracted by the awesome typing skills that only when Kakashi said something along the lines of "here's an example of KakaNaru" did he get back to reality.

Doing as he was instructed, Sasuke got down on his knees yo the coffee table and glanced at what results had come up from Kakashi's search.

"...'**Tonight's The Night!**', huh? That's a pretty weird title." Sasuke commented as he gestured to the title. Kakashi, from where he was leaning against the couch nearby, rolled his visible eye.

"I do not KNOW how wrote it. But they probably couldn't think of a good title to save their life. Just read the part of the fanfiction I had scrolled to earlier; it will give you a good example of the pairing and it's details for existence."

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Sai's Home 9:56 AM-**

In a small home in the Leaf, a pair of dark emotionless eyes scanned over the almost-finished painting with dedication. He really had no idea what he was painting. He truly had no clue whatsoever.

He just found it extremely amazing to look at: with the way the colors complimented each other and brought out the best in them. He saw this painting as...

Wait.

Sai's eyes suddenly widened a little and his body went limp in an **overly-dramatic** kind of way. His brush fell to the hard floor with a audible _**CLICK**_.

"I don't know why, but I suddenly have the feeling that somewhere...a really skilled jounin and an evil prick are checking out one of my **KakaNaru** **fanfiction** stories." Sai shook his head and sighed. "And...one of them is getting unhealthily jealous..."

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Naruto's Home 9:59 AM-**

The KakaNaru fanfiction was under the genre Romance/parody. And it seemed not-so interesting by the dull summary, but Kakashi told Sasuke to check it out anyway. Besides, you can't judge a book by it's cover.

Or in this case, you can't judge a fanfiction by it's title/summary. Hey...that was a good quote, Kakashi noted with a smirk under his mask, he quickly got out a notepad and pencil; excitedly writing that down for future usage. And, by the way, this action wasn't noticed by Sasuke because he was scrolling through the fanfiction's many chapters: it had over ten. Probably thirteen in total, Sasuke went to the very last chapter like he was instructed/forced to and started reading the ending chapter.

Why he had to start at the ending just to learn an example of the pairing, he would never understand. He just started reading silently...unexpected jealously starting to build up as he read.

_**[XXXXX]**_

_It was very hard work, but the infatuated young man knew it would be all worth it in the end. After all: he seriously did like his older neighbor. WAY beyond what one should like of their neighbor. Naruto didn't know how it started, but he just knew he was falling more and more for the man. He had only known him for a few months though! But hey, it's not like he could help it._

_Kakashi Hatake was so beyond attractive, and his cool laid back personality made him all the more likeable. The way he was friendly to Naruto and never once yelled at him for playing his music way too loud at night, constantly losing his apartment keys and having to get help to get inside his place, or when he sleepwalked into his apartment several times. And just because there was a little age difference: Naruto being seventeen-and-a-half and Kakashi being twenty-three, that did not bother Naruto. ...Even though to some it may seem perverted._

_A happy sigh escaped Naruto's lips as he brought himself out of his thoughts about the man. This wasn't the time for daydreaming, because even though he had carefully set up the dining room for dinner, he would have to go out and pick up the food he ordered just for the occasion. It was Kakashi's birthday that night, in Naruto's mind it he would score points with him if he showed him he cared about that and surprised him with an invite to come over and have dinner._

_To HIS surprise, Kakashi had accepted the offer. And a faint blush dusted across Naruto's cheeks as he remembered how he had nearly fallen unconscious upon his answer. It was a good thing that he did not do that though; that would have been humiliating because they were out in public at the supermarket, and the young man wasn't quite ready for Kakashi to find out about his secret feelings for him._

_It would have been very obvious if he had-_

_All of a sudden, a loud DING echoed throughout the apartment. It was soon followed by a familiar voice saying something along the lines of: 'Damn these crappy doorbells! It gets me every time!' And Naruto right away had a good idea of who was at the door: Kiba, a friend of his that had himself an apartment around there as well. But, his was in a little bit better shape._

"_Naruto! You home, man?"_

"_Be right there!" Naruto called back as he hurried over to the kitchen screen._

_He quickly closed the screen that separated the kitchen from the living room. Because of the screen, it was impossible to see the inside of the kitchen. That was Naruto's goal: because the kitchen was good-sized and could hold a big table. The table was already decorated in advance for the occasion that night, the last thing he wanted was for Kiba to see it and nosily ask why it was decorated impressively. Look, Naruto and Kiba where good friends of course, but the guy was always so nosy when it came to things like that. And Naruto really didn't feel like confessing it was for his neighbor's birthday, who we might add is much older than him and is male. He also found himself hesitant to let Kiba know he was...well, gay. Kiba wouldn't understand, he wasn't so into the idea of guys liking guys or girls liking girls._

_Naruto couldn't stand the thought of losing a friend, he already had that happen to him five years ago and didn't want to relive that experience._

"_Are you going to let me in? What's goin' on in there?"_

"_I'm coming, Kiba!"_

_Naruto swiftly shifted over to the small loveseat in the middle of the room and kicked the small neatly wrapped box he had on the floor under the cream-colored coffee table and then sighed before running his fingers through his spiky blond locks. At least now, Kiba wouldn't be suspicious._

_So Naruto finally arrived at the door and twisted the lock, allowing Kiba to enter. The other young man greeted him in his normal causal manner and then grinned._

"_'Kay, I know it's last-minute and all," Kiba began, rubbing the back of his neck in a nervous manner briefly. He was a little worried that Naruto would snap if he didn't put this lightly. "But my girlfriend, Hinata, she caught the some flu last week and still isn't well enough to leave the house. And we WERE going to go to this concert tonight, can't now though. So Naruto, I figured we might as well go and hang out together; we haven't gotten to often since me and Hinata started dating...how about it?"_

_Oh...how could he turn Kiba down? Naruto normally would just charge in at a time such as this one, and totally forget about his previous plans. But because it was for his -sexy- neighbor, he didn't give in. It was hard, he was actually starting to sweat a little and feel like he was about to get sick or something. When he caught sight of the tickets in Kiba's hands and the band name, he almost slipped and agreed. It HAD been a while since they had been out together since Kiba and Hinata had been going out, that was true._

_And on the OTHER HAND: he was so crazy about Kakashi, and he couldn't let him down either. The man was always very friendly to Naruto and even allowed him to visit and chat. There was several times when he would let his imagination get the better of him and ponder what should happen if Kakashi actually felt the same way about him...it would be very wonderful. He would score points if he could impress Kakashi...ohhhhh...what to do?_

"_H-hey! Naruto! What the hell is wrong with you? You look pale!" Shouted Kiba as he worriedly stared at his friend. "Man, you're not getting sick too, right? Are you okay?"_

_And HOW could he be okay? The poor guy was in a conflict between his only close guy friend, and his sexy neighbor that just might return his feelings if he could-_

_**[XXXXX]**_

Looking over at Sasuke, Kakashi was shocked to see that he seemed to be trembling a little. Why the hell was he trembling? A piece of fanfiction can't get to one THAT badly! He almost regretted ever showing Sasuke the fanfiction, but then the slightly-jealous teen scowled at the screen as he finished reading the rest of the fic: the ending particularly got to him because it ended with a hot confession between Naruto and Kakashi, then a make-out session occurred, then it ended in the most cliché way the Uchiha had ever seen since checking out fanfiction: the sitting by the docks of the town watching the sun set "beautifully", and Naruto falling asleep on Kakashi's shoulder just as the sun set and twilight cast over the secluded area.

"Sasuke, it WASN'T real!" Kakashi informed, suddenly appearing and grabbing his shoulders firmly and pulling him up to his feet. "I don't like Naruto, Naruto doesn't like me, and there is no such thing as **converse sneakers**!"

Sasuke tuned out to Kakashi's utterly useless sayings. He didn't know why (or WANT to know why), but he actually felt a little jealous by the fact that Naruto and Kakashi were...well, paired together. The way Naruto was portrayed in the fanfiction...maybe he was jealous because he wanted it be **himself** in Kakashi's place?

Wait.

Sasuke's eyes widened and he pushed Kakashi back. He walked over to the wall as if we were drunk and proceeded to bang do something he REALLY DIDN'T want to do. Something that Uchiha were to superior to do...

**BANG!**

Kakashi looked over at Sasuke and sweatdropped.

**BANG! BANG!**

"I think I understand why you were trembling..."

**BANG!**

"Sasuke, Sasuke, it was just a fanfiction...there's no need to be getting unnecessarily jealous."

**BANG! BANG! BANG!**

"...You must be embarrassed..."

**BANG! BANG! **(Insert a glare back at Kakashi after Sasuke realized what he had just said) **BANG!**

"I know what will lighten this tense mood." Kakashi declared as he picked up Sasuke's **Acer laptop**. "I could show you some funny comedies about me and Sakura paired together. There's this one called-"

"Just leave." Sasuke deadpanned, never looking up as he rested his throbbing head against the wall from where he banged it. Quickly, he raised his hand up and motioned for Kakashi to leave...and maybe made a few other "ruder" gestures as well.

At the moment, maybe he WAS taking it a little too far. But he couldn't help it. Sasuke found that he got jealous rather easily since the time he had been given that love bit- I mean, **Curse Mark** from Orochimaru. And that was a long time ago.

Kakashi took the oppurtinty to leave. But he did not once lose his cool composure. Instead of fleeing away in a hysterical kind of way, he took his leave in more nonchalant way: he disappeared and all that was left in return was a small cloud of smoke.

Seeing that he was once again alone, Sasuke sighed deeply and walked over to Naruto's couch. He was still exhausted from the previous night, not to mention his head was now killing him and his thoughts were in a state of massive confusion over WHY he got jealous so easily.

He silently hoped that Kakashi wouldn't drop by for a visit for a little while. At least, until Sasuke was once again calm and emotionless about everything. Fanfiction really was full of horrors after all...

And those were Sasuke's last thoughts; his eyes soon flickered closed as he lied there on his side. He soon fell into a deep sleep...

_**Continued.**_

_**[XXXXX]**_

_**Um...yeah, that was a really weird chapter. -_-'**_

_**Well, I hope you enjoyed it. I admit it, it was FUN to write. And the only reason why I made it so freakin' long was because I felt like you (readers) deserved it after such a LONG wait.**_

_**But, this chapter was weird, I'll admit that too a thousand times over if I could. I still cannot seem to get over that. -.-' But at least the plot is going farther again and a lot of things happened: Sasuke is now temporarily staying with Naruto while they clean out the house together, AND check out fanfiction in between that. And behind the scenes, it seems like Iruka and Sai are interested in fanfiction and have "written" a lot. We also kind of...well, get another useless appearance by Zetsu, but at least we see that he has some kind of "plan". *Smiles* Don't worry, I DO like him as a character. I'm not bashing him from dislike or anything, it's just...er...actually pretty easy to bash him. But he does have a role that won't be revealed for a few more chapters to come. ^^;**_

_**Anyway, I hope to write the next chapter soon. I've been neglecting updating...and I am sorry for that! -_- It's just, a new busy year for me and all...**_

_**Read and review! :)**_


	6. Let's Goof Off Today

_**Author's Note: Sorry for the short chapter. I wanted to go ahead and write it up while it crossed my mind to.**_

_**I have some good news: I intend to update The Sand Siblings Go On A Road Trip, and One Troublesome Night, Soon. Their new chapters are still being written, but it shouldn't be too long of a wait at this point.**_

_**Sadly, I have a tad bit of writer's block for Kinda Ironic Ain't It? And Death Note: A Series of Unfortunate Events. -.- To Anyone out there who likes those two fics, I will try and get rid of the evil writer's block right away. Maybe they will be updated soon as well.**_

_**And now back for THIS story, enjoy the chapter. Even though...it isn't really much. Naruto and Sasuke don't discover anything "new". Consider this as..."filler". That is, if you want to.**_

_**Disclaimer: Naruto, the songs being mentioned, the cleaning products mentioned, and pretty much all the real life items and whatnot mentioned DOES NOT belong to me. :[**_

_**[XXXXX]**_

_**The Many Horrors of Fanfiction!**_

_**Chapter Six: Let's Goof Off Today**_

**.**

**.**

**.**

"**W-what the hell is going on?" Sasuke looked around frantically, the entire area was nothing but darkness. No matter which way he looked, nothing was in sight.**

**A normal person would probably freak out if they were surrounded by darkness. Well, Sasuke was not at all freaked out; only a little confused.**

**He was used to seeing crazy things. Crazy things such as the following: pedophile snake men, innocent people being controlled by demons, people with abnormal hair colors, giant snakes bigger than the Empire State Building, Weird plant/human hybrids stalking him, ect. The list just goes on and on and on and on...**

**Anyway, back to the show. So Sasuke crossed his arms and started walking. He didn't know what was happening, but walking around would lead him somewhere were things surely made sense.**

"**I don't know what's happening...and if that stupid Sexyback song plays from nowhere again, I'll kill myself..."**

**He kept walking. Sadly, it didn't seem that he was getting anywhere at all. It was still completely dark. And it wasn't a good darkness either, it was totally eerie and had that cheap horror-movie feel to it. Even when Sasuke tried to use his Chidori to try and make a little bit of light, the jutsu mysteriously wouldn't work. No matter how many times he tried!**

"**Okay, now I'm really pissed off! What's going on? Hello?" Sasuke shouted, but his words just echoed in yet another pathetic kind of way. By hearing the echo, Sasuke was surprised to find out that he sounded totally pathetic.**

**Ugh. Well, maybe if he just continued walking he could find at least one other soul. However, as he started walking again, a bright light suddenly shone from the West. Sasuke was caught off guard by the bright light and gasped BRIEFLY before shielding his eyes from it.**

"**Hello, Sasuke. I haven't seen you in quite a while."**

**That voice...that voice...well, the bewildered Uchiha didn't know who that voice belonged to. But the voice was utterly hypnotizing. It sounded like a female's...but he wasn't really attracted by it or anything. No, he was just shocked by how it beautifully said those words. Sasuke removed his hands from his eyes but was shocked once again to see a girl probably his age barely centimeters away from his face.**

**If he wasn't...swinging the other way, he would have definitely been attracted to this girl's appearance. She was his height and had really pale skin. She had short raven hair to her cheeks; but it had a lot of volume to it and framed her face nicely. She also had dark eyes like his own; they met with his eyes and somewhat of a mental conversation ensued as a result of it.**

**It was too dark to see what she was wearing though, but when she took a hand and used it to cup his face teasingly, he felt worn gloves.**

"**Don't panic, Sasuke. This is merely all a dream of course." The girl said slowly as if she was talking to a child. Sasuke gave her a blank look when she said that. Somehow, she wasn't so hypnotizing anymore... "I had to find some kind of way to contact you, but this was the only way I could think of at the moment."**

"**Who...who are you?" Sasuke inquired, putting her explanation to an abrupt halt. "You seem familiar somehow."**

**The mystery girl giggled. And Sasuke's restless and irritated state was somehow soothed. Her giggle was girlish, but not as annoying as the other girl's giggles. It...it didn't sound fangirl-ish at all.**

"**I am..."**

**.**

**.**

**.**

_**[XXXXX]**_

"...Uke...Sasuke...hello? Sasuke? SAS-UKE? _SAUCEGAY_?"

Tossed a little back onto his side in a restless state. And his once-peaceful slumber was immediately ruined. His eyes slowly flickered just in time to see a fist flying into his face; violently colliding.

"AH! WHAT THE HELL?"

"You're awake!"

Sasuke just sat up on the couch, holding a hand over his now-bleeding nose. Naruto apparently didn't intend to punch him THAT hard, and he immediately sweatdropped when he noticed the blood drip down his hand.

"Naruto...what are you doing here? And did you just call me **SauceGay**?" Sasuke drearily asked, he still wasn't all there at the moment since his slumber was suddenly disturbed.

Naruto answered the first question. He mentioned that he had returned back after running into Iruka at Ichiraku's; the two had discussed the most random things ever while they ate their ramen. The academy teacher also informed him about a lot of different Kakashi pairings when he questioned about them. And not only that, but he also told him to keep a close eye out for terrible creatures known only as: **Mary-Sues**.

But Naruto didn't answer the last one. Eh...he only called him that because he recently discovered that if one says 'Sasuke' very fast, it DOES sound a lot like 'SauceGay'. But...MOVING ON...anyway, Naruto seemed to be really excited as he started going into detail about these "Mary-Sues" when Sasuke asked about them.

Apparently, Iruka told him that Mary-Sues were one of the most horrifying things you'll ever see in Fanfiction. From his description: they are too overly-perfect and unrealistic. They can do ANYTHING without even breaking a sweat. Naruto mentioned all of this in a really excited tone, but it was also dull at the same time. Sasuke was like a sponge, trying to absorb this new information he was receiving. But listening to the crazy blond's exciting tone was somehow distracting him.

"And also, he said that they lurk in EVERY fandom! What really sucks the most is that they were usually paired up with the main characters; and the stupidly portrayed characters actually FALL totally head over heels for them!" Naruto finished as he stopped waving his arms around in a frantic manner. He felt that it was best to go ahead and warn his friend and **temporary roommate **about these creatures. "So be VERY CAREFUL, Sasuke! They totally murder the story with their ways, and I don't want you...or **anyone** to suffer them!"

Sasuke just nodded, and pulled away the blood-stained towel from his nose. Naruto had frowned when he noted how he didn't mean to possibly BREAK his nose. Maybe...maybe he didn't know his own strength? Or maybe he was becoming **bipolar** like Sakura...

"I'll be careful. Besides, I doubt that I would be stupid enough to read about a overly-perfect bitch with everyone in the universe wrapped around her little finger, Naruto." Sasuke pointed out. He started walking off into the next room to take the bloody rag to the washing machine. His voice could be heard as he said the rest. "You see, I have no interest in the opposite sex whatsoever. I never have, never will. You all might as well GIVE UP..."

Naruto crossed his arms and a skeptical look flashed over his face. "So what ARE you...?"

By the time Naruto said that, Sasuke walked back into the room and then replied in the dullest, most uninterested tone you would **ever** hear: "Asexual."

Naruto, having never heard that term, blinked in a way that pretty much said: "I don't know what the hell you're rambling about".

"Asexual, let me put it in simple terms: I have no interest in either sex, nor do I EVER intend to."

Oh...now Naruto understood. But he still was not sure that Sasuke was like that. He obviously **did** have a sex; he wasn't some PLANT like that weird guy with the split personalities that kept stalking them!

"Cut it out! You can't possibly be ASEXUAL because your password is gay, you keep talking about wanting to 'restore your clan', and you've GOT to be male!" Naruto protested loudly as he made this weird gestures with his hands. They uh...they didn't really have anything to do with the topic though. They were just utterly random.

"Naruto, the point IS, I would immediately stop reading once the main made up female character was beginning to be described as way too perfect and unrealistically sexy." Sasuke pointed out. Although he did feel the need to end this totally unnecessary dialogue that went from Mary Sues, to Sasuke's sex, and back to Mary Sues in a really weird way.

And sad thing is: they both knew they were going nowhere with it...

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-The Marketplace 10:40 AM-**

The village's marketplace was busy as usual. Various shinobi and villagers wandered around either shopping or talking. It was almost always bustling. Among these people, there happened to be two that stood out a little bit:

Two people were walking along, one of them was Zetsu. Nobody really payed him any attention whatsoever. And that was just freaking WEIRD. Wouldn't someone stop and do something normal...like stare at his odd appearance? Well, none of the villagers seemed to care at all. The sad thing was that there were even ANBU patrolling around. And when they noticed the plant man, they either shrugged their shoulders and continued patrolling...or slipped their masks off and rubbed their eyes tiredly before doing a comical double-take.

The person walking beside Zetsu seemed really uncomfortable and maybe even a little embarrassed at the same time. This person appeared to be a very pretty woman with long blond hair and big blue eyes. She wore a long dark purple causal kimono that nicely hugged her curves.

"...I am so going to kill a CERTAIN someone when this is all over..." The woman hissed under her breath before self-consciously folding her arms over her chest and sending death glares to all the men who stopped to look at her. "Zetsu, this is just so stupid! I hate crossdressing; I swore I'd never do it again!"

"**Just the hell up! Look, all you have to do is keep up the genjutsu cast on you to make yourself appear to be a woman, this could really help us! What these damn fools don't know is that the Akatsuki are coming back for another round...**"

The 'woman' suddenly stared in shock and then quickly hit Zetsu's shoulder. "Don't say our plans **out loud**, Zetsu! YES...we're coming back for revenge on those who killed us a while ago, but if anyone hears us, then we're doomed to be discovered!"

"**Fine, fine. Come on Deidara, we have to find that pink-haired bitch who's pals with the jinchuriki and get her to tell us where his house is...**"

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Naruto Uzumaki's Old Home 11:00 AM-**

"_**I'm bringing sexy b-**_"

"NARUTO!"

The next thing Naruto knew, there was a pillow thrown at his head. He yelped and stumbled back. "But, it's your theme song! It's SO catchy!"

There was no way that annoying tune was his theme song. If he were to have a theme song, it would be something that sounds WAY better than that. And definitely a song of that genre. His would probably be...alternative metal or something along the lines of that, Sasuke noted while watching Naruto freak out and protest about the song.

You see, the orange ninja had found the song to be catchy. And when the lyrics randomly came to mind after he thought about the time he had found old shackles in his basement, he started to sing the song. And MAYBE it was also because he wanted to annoy the hell out of Sasuke. He had to admit, annoying Sasuke could be **really **fun!

The two were once again quiet. Sasuke was back to surfing the internet on his laptop, and Naruto was wandering around in his own little world...and checking his watch every two seconds. For what seemed like hours, Naruto paced back and forth in the room; sighing deeply and overly-dramatically when passing the couch.

It was really getting on Sasuke's nerves.

Finally, after what could have been the fifty-first time passing the couch and sighing, Sasuke decided to be bold and ask the big question: "Are you bored out of your mind?"

His reply was a silent nod. And Sasuke then thought about what he could do next. As he have it some thought, he concluded that Naruto didn't have anything to do that day; and was obviously bored. Maybe he could...ugh...do something with him. Sakura was right after all, they SHOULD get "reacquainted" after all these years.

So, Sasuke suggested that since they didn't have anything to do until later that night, they might as well goof off together; maybe start talking or even try and do research on fanfiction. Naruto agreed to do this and suddenly felt pumped up. He plopped down on the couch beside his old teammate/rival/friend/rumored lover and took the laptop right of his lap and into his own.

"I know what we can do!" Naruto announced. That was all he had said.

Now that Sasuke was laptop-less he sat there and leaned back against the couch watching Naruto type like some kind of mental person. Now, for the record, he COULD have showed him the more composed and normal way to type. It wouldn't have been difficult. But, he was slightly amused by Naruto's awkward way of typing, so didn't crash the fun.

Sasuke tried to look over at what Naruto was doing multiple times. He never did get to see just what he was doing because Naruto was being too stubborn and inched away or turned the laptop in the opposite direction. It was annoying.

"We're almost there-"

**DING DONG!**

Sasuke blinked at that sound. It was a doorbell. But...one thing confused him: since WHEN did Naruto get a doorbell? He hadn't noticed a doorbell on the door...but that could have been because he wasn't paying attention that and was more worried about the **precious** suitcase of hair products he had Naruto dragging along. Yeah, that's it.

He questioned Naruto about who that could be. But he only got a bunch of barely audible mumbling in response. However, he had acted his Sharingan beforehand and clearly read Naruto's lip movement, Naruto mumbled this: "I don't know who's at the door. It better not be that weird plant guy, any of the other antagonists, Ino, or the **tax collector**!"

"_Naruto knows the word '__**Antagonists**__'? And what the hell is a TAX COLLECTOR?_" Sasuke thought while deactivating the Sharingan and getting up to answer the door. Even when he made it to the door, he was still amazed Naruto knew such a big word like that.

And...he also found himself curious about what a "tax collector" was. He made a mental note to search that with google...

**DING DONG!**

"Sasuke, answer the door before I start playing SexyBack over and over again!"

Sasuke stared speechless at Naruto after he said that. The idiot had said that with such a dead serious tone. Like...he really was going to do it. Nothing would change his mind. And that song was stupid enough already!

Without a second thought, although he didn't want to, Sasuke left the room and back through the hall to the door. And Naruto smiled wickedly to himself as he realized what kind of effect that "stupid song" had on him.

"_Wow...I can use this song as a threat! Must remember this for the future..._"

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Elsewhere In The Hidden Leaf (Where Insanity Was Unfolding) 11:14 AM-**

"Sakura? You home?" Ino called out as she wandered through Sakura's home.

Sakura hadn't been sent out on missions lately because things were actually starting to calm down a bit in the village and other lands. She spent most of the time out or at the hospital, but she wasn't there. So, Ino assumed she must have been home. She really wasn't all that sure because Sakura's mom wasn't home either.

Sakura's home wasn't all that big. The house was still neatly-decorated though. Almost everything was in neat order too. It was SO much nicer looking than her own house was...her father could be messy sometimes, and her mother was always so busy in the gardens. Plus, Ino was far too busy with her own life to care about how her house looked. And, besides, she planned to move out on her own by her next birthday anyway.

"Sakura! Hello!" Ino was becoming a little frustrated. She wanted to hang out with Sakura because she had heard from some random nurse in the hospital the previous afternoon that Sasuke had finally **returned**. She wanted to know if this was true or not. Because...she wanted to find him and settle something with him. "ANYBODY HOME?"

"In here!" Sakura's voice called back slightly muffled.

Ino sighed and followed the voice to it's source. She had walked a little bit farther until arriving outside Sakura's bedroom. Happy that she found her old friend, she opened the door and barged right in.

Because, who needs to knock anymore? That takes all the fun out of barging in on something interesting or hilarious going on in the room!

Anyway, Ino entered/barged into the room and looked around for Sakura. She did see the other girl sitting at her computer and giggling while typing something. Something of a curious expression appeared on Ino's face and she walked up to Sakura from behind and looked over her shoulder at the screen.

"What are you doing, Sakura?" Ino asked. "Nobody answered the door, and I wanted to ask you something important about Sas-"

Suddenly, Sakura wiped a few tears of laughter from her eyes, amused by her own imagination, and twirled to face Ino in the spin-y computer chair. She explained what she was doing with a lot of detail. And she finally lost it several seconds later, she burst into a fit of snickers when another great idea came to mind.

You see, she was in the middle of writing something on her computer. It was (now; since Naruto discovered her) no secret that she wrote a lot as **CherryBlossom17**. But she wanted to take a break from all the fanfiction and write something...a little bit different. She was writing a LIST: a list about many ways to **annoy **Sasuke. It wasn't that Sakura was trying to bash him or anything...but he was beginning to get on her nerves with how he was SO OUT OF IT when it came to fanfiction.

Ino sucked up all this information...like a sponge or something. She nodded and immediately smiled and ran over to the screen and started looking over at what was written.

"Let me see what you wrote! I've seen several lists like these before, but I want to know what kind of things YOU could come up with!"

"Um...wait...weren't you just about to ask me something?" Sakura quietly pointed out as she nervously remembered Ino's previous words.

"I don't remember now, I can't keep my weak mind on more than one topic at a time!"

...Yeah, that was kind of true. Ino was always skipping around with topics like that. But, anyway, Sakura smirked and scrolled back up to the list she was writing: called, **34 Ways To Annoy The Hell out of Sasuke Uchiha**.

"I only have ten ways right now." Sakura confessed as she sighed and brushed through her hair. "But, I hope to complete this list! I don't really plan to post it, I just need something around to keep me entertained."

"I heard that! I've done the same thing...only with Chouji."

And so, Sakura gladly showed her friend the temporarily-short list of ways to annoy their old crush. The list sure wasn't all that big yet, but the ideas were so hilarious that both girls couldn't help but laugh out loud as they read on.

Ah...goofing off was so fun. But, they weren't the only ones goofing off. Kakashi, Iruka, Naruto, Sasuke, all of them were goofing off as well. But that was okay: because even shinobi needed to goof off once in a while...

_**Continued.**_

_**[XXXXX]**_

_**-EXTRA SCENES-**_

"So, did you dream about anything while you were sleeping earlier?" Naruto nonchalantly asked Sasuke while he waited for the laptop to take him to **Youtube** to watch some episodes of Bleach.

"Actually...there was this weird dream. It was all dark and there was this beautiful girl talking to me; saying a bunch of crap about how she was waiting for me...and you woke me up just before she told me her name."

Naruto thought for a minute as he tried to piece this information together. He crossed his arms. Okay...dark background, beautiful and graceful girl appearing out of nowhere, talking in a hypnotizing voice... wait, no way! Naruto gasped and snapped a finger, the sudden movement caused the laptop to fall out of his lap and crash to the floor.

Sasuke stared sadly at his laptop that now lie on the floor. He lamented in his mind about how much it had cost several years ago.

"Sounds like a **wet dream**!" Naruto suddenly yelled. He got up and stood on the couch, pointing indignantly at Sasuke. "AHA! YOU REALLY AREN'T ASEXUAL! But you CAN'T be straight...maybe this 'girl' was really a crossdressing **sexy guy**, and he was about to reveal himself and throw himself on you by the time I had woken you up!"

Okay, that was just a lot of bullshit. Really, was Naruto THAT concerned about whether he was straight or not? So many different questions floated through the confused and annoyed Uchiha's head. He tried to convince Naruto that it wasn't a wet dream, but more like some kind of sign.

Naruto didn't buy it. He was too busy freaking out, but eventually realized how stupid he was looking and plopped back down on the couch.

Sasuke put a hand on his forehead and then shook his head in a disapproving way. "Well, we won't find out until the NEXT chapter. Just try to at least keep your cool until then."

"Oh yeah...the next chapter...I CAN'T WAIT **THAT LONG**!" Naruto hollered, trembling with excitement as he grinned. "I REALLY WANNA KNOW!"

Sasuke gave him a "WTF?" look as he carefully inched away from him.

"Come ON, Sasuke! Tell me! You have the **script** right there in your hands!"

In fact, Sasuke did have a script in his hands. He had been reading over it because he wanted to find out if anything cool at all would happen to him(All he found so far was unnecessary torture). But, he didn't want Naruto to find about what would happen and spoil everything. He just took the script and stuffed it into the back of his shirt before getting up.

"I'm going to go out and get some more cleaning supplies for when we clean out the house." Sasuke mentioned before coolly walking off.

Naruto was left alone and he cried out in annoyance.

"OH COME ON! I JUST WANT TO KNOW! WHO SAYS I'D SPOIL ANYTHING IMPORTANT?"

Sasuke was already long gone.

_**End of Extra.**_

_**[XXXXX]**_

_**Chapter six, over now! Wow, that was all extremely random to type! But I guess it ended fine. The story isn't over yet, Naruto and Sasuke will get back to checking out fanfiction in the next chapter! ;) They will also discover two more pairings, get more visitors, and meet up with two female OCs I randomly through in for insanity. Can someone say...it's getting more and more crazier?**_

_**I guess this chapter was needed. It was revealed that Zetsu actually has a plan and...Deidara apparently is alive by unknown circumstances so far and is a part of it as well. O_o And Sasuke's random dream was needed to; you'll all find out in the next chapter...and Naruto will too.**_

_**I hope you liked the weird little extra I threw in. I don't know why I did it. I just felt like it. I guess I was feeling kinda random at the time; I had just finished reading this really cracky KH story before writing this chapter, so...yes...**_

_**Let me know your thoughts. Read and review~! ;) I will try to update it soon, don't worry!**_


	7. Accidental Discoveries

**_Author's Note:_ _I wanted to write this chapter much sooner. But...um...somehow along the way, I started procrastinating with it. -.- Well, anyway, the point is that I finally have written it! And before we begin reading, let me explain this to you as a warning: THE FOLLOWING CHAPTER CONTAINS SOME (...probably minor) FEMALE OCS. The two of them were not really thought out all that well._**

_**However, I tried to give them both a little bit of a story and realistic traits. But, for comedy purposes, they will sometimes act like Mary-Sues; but this is only to teach Naruto and Sasuke more about fanfiction and the horrors of these infamous creatures!**_

_**Oh, and there's more slight NaruSasu moments, mentioning of ItaSasu, SasuSaku, and KakuNaru just for the hell of it! ;)**_

_**Anyway, I hope you enjoy~**_

_**Disclaimer: *Insert a really detailed explanation of how Naruto doesn't and never will belong to me here***_

_**[XXXXX]**_

_**The Many Horrors of Fanfiction!**_

_**Chapter Seven: Accidental Discoveries**_

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Timeskip To 4:44 PM Somewhere In The Leaf-**

"WHY DO I ALWAYS HAVE TO CARRY THE HEAVY STUFF?"

"Naruto, just SHUT UP. You're drawing too much attention as it is."

"Oh, like it's all MY fault! And besides Sasuke, if you take a look around, this part of the village is empty and quiet because it's getting late!"

"Can you just be quiet? Look, I said that I would make all this up for you someday. One day, the tables will turn; and I'll be the one carrying heavy stuff while you're ahead laughing your ass off at my misfortune."

"Okay...but it still isn't fair in the PRESENT time-"

"I'm not listening to your complaining; I'm officially drowning you out with this random song! _**I've been down the wrong road tonight...and I swear I'll never go there again! I've seen this face once before! And I don't think I can do this again~...**_"

What few villagers walking by wore strange expressions as they past Naruto and Sasuke. They couldn't help but stare at the **temporary roomates **because they just looked so stupid at the moment. Naruto's hands were full of heavy cleaning supplies and he was yelling at Sasuke.

Between that, Sasuke was only carrying a lightweight bucket. And to drown out Naruto's yelling and choice words that would not be mentioned at the moment, he was loudly singing a **3 Doors Down** song.

Because they both looked as if they had lost it, the villagers hurriedly picked up their walking paces. Although, one of these people walking by happened to be Zetsu once again; and Zetsu was so amazed by the interesting song that he secretly started stalking Naruto and Sasuke once again to continue listening to the Uchiha's totally random performance.

Twilight was nearing. The sky began to start turning dark. Many of the nearby stores were closing, and the bars and restaurants were beginning to light up and open for the night. The nearby homes were all filled and the marketplace was bare and eerily silent. Some of the street lights were flickering every once in a while, waiting to turn on and illuminate the dark streets.

Shadows of the walking people danced (not literally!) across the buildings and alleys. This was at was interesting about the Leaf. Even after all the hell that it's been through, attacks...wars...demons...snakes...revenge-obsessed emos...it still was much more lively and bustling at any time. So very much unlike other villages; poor and unpopulated with the occasional tumbleweed passing through.

The village was, in a nutshell, impressive.

Naruto had been noting all of this as he finally realized arguing with Sasuke was pointless. After all, Sasuke had been so into the song that he continued singing until the end; and even started singing it **again**!

Anyway, the walk to the Uchiha residence was not at all eventful. Unless, you count Zetsu stalking, Naruto having to carry really heavy cleaning supplies and hollering protests, Sasuke singing randomly while carrying a lightweight bucket with one hand, and many annoyed villagers, then...perhaps it was in some point of view. This walk didn't last all that long either. Naruto and Sasuke arrived outside the house exactly thirty minutes later.

Naruto was the first to take notice to this for once. Sasuke...kept singing because the song got stuck in his head after the first five repeats.

"Oh, thank god, we're HERE!" Naruto pretty much lost it at that moment and dropped all the cleaning supplies before running over to the porch and hugging the same piece of wood that Sakura had hung on to for balance the previous day when she was kicked out. "Sasuke! We're here, you can shut up!"

"_**There's something I can't see~...something different in the way you smile~...Behind those eyes you lie-**_" Sasuke glanced up at the house and noticed that they had arrived, ignoring the fact that Naruto was cradling the piece of wood and crying tears of unexplainable joy, he then slapped himself in the face so he would stop singing. It worked.

"Oh, we're...ah...finally here." Sasuke glanced around nervously and tried to cover it all up with a cough. Hoping that nobody had taken notice to his random singing. "Naruto, stop making love with the piece of wood and let's go inside and start cleaning the place out..."

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Sakura's House 5:14 PM-**

"You know, I haven't heard anything from Sasuke or Naruto today. I can't help but wonder what's going on." Sakura stated causally before taking a sip of tea. "I just hope they're getting along. Because this situation is a chance for me to get rid of my writer's block and finish that ItaSasu fanfiction I have had on hiatus for two months today. I can always borrow ideas."

Ino was sitting on Sakura's bed and calmly sipping some tea as well. When she had finished taking a long, exaggerated sip, she smirked. "Well, knowing them, they might be doing some very stupid. I accidentally discovered yesterday, after running into this weird guy with a flytrap-thing on his head, that they were busy with trying to clean out the hold house. But that's all he could say...before this slutty blond woman stormed up to him and started cussing him out for 'leaving' her behind with a bunch of 'perverted bastards'. She then started hollering about **art**, and I got bored and fled like a mental person..."

"That sounds very strange!"

"I know that! Geez, there's been nothing but chaos ever since Sasuke returned back!" Ino suddenly dropped her excited act and calmly took another big sip of tea. She smiled, content with the steamy liquid, and then started freaking out again and threw the empty cup against the wall. "I just know that things are about to get really fucked up-I have a good feeling! There's a lot of **shady** characters coming in and out of the village and Tsunade is still not in the mood to interrogate them all. Sakura, it could be up to us to do something..."

Sakura stopped being interested in this crazy conversation since Ino started going on and on about the plant hybrid dude and the slut. She just calmly took sips of tea like a normal person, allowing her friend to aimlessly state a lot of useless things.

"Sakura! Are you even LISTENING?"

"Yup."

"What was I just saying then...?"

"You're ranting about how Sasuke looks way better with Itachi than how he would with ME."

Ino just stopped ranting altogether and stared awkwardly at Sakura, while the pink-haired medic turned back around in the spiny computer chair and placed the cup of steaming tea back on the desk.

She didn't know how the hell her words were just twisted, but all that mattered at the moment was that they WERE! But, Ino couldn't argue right now. Now that she gave it some deeper thought, she concluded that it would be utterly useless to try and get back to the topic. She smiled like a perverted fangirl and folded her arms.

"Actually...yeah, he does look better with Itachi. But, for the record, I have only seen those cliché WANTED posters of Itachi in the interrogation room. Even then, they would make an epic couple. And, forehead, Sasuke never once did look good with **you**..."

Sakura masked her annoyed state by faking a laugh. She then spun around in the chair to face Ino and gave her a cruel stare as her eye twitched a little evilly. "True, true, pig. But I'm OVER him; there's no need to bring up any unnecessary old memories..."

"I'll stop, when you stop twisting my words and letting me FINISH a rant for once!"

"Oh, GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!"

"I'LL LEAVE THEN! BUT I'M TAKING THAT STRANGELY-DELICIOUS TEA WITH ME!"

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Sasuke's Old Home 5:31 PM-**

"Okay, just put the stuff down and we'll decide what we'll clean out first."

Naruto nodded in understanding. He pretty much carelessly dropped all the cleaning supplies from his hands and they scattered all over the floor. And, meanwhile, Sasuke stared in a mix of pity and surprise.

"...That was really expected." Sasuke coughed and then tried to change the subject by saying, "Anyway, we need to decide what to clean out first. A few hours ago while we were reading that fanfiction about you and Kakashi having to pretend to be in a relationship, I already planned out what we would do..."

And Sasuke went on to explain his decision that Naruto had no say in whatsoever. He mentioned that they would first concentrate on the outside of the house; it seemed logical to clean the outside first because it was going to be less hard. And the overall presentation of the OUTSIDE was important, so people visiting or passing by wouldn't think that Sasuke's a slob and that the Uchiha clan was full of uncaring slobs...

Naruto listened, but had to argue like usual. There was something about this that he didn't like. What was it? Oh yeah: the fact that they would be OUTSIDE at NIGHT, trying to CLEAN the house! Oh that was sooooo genius, Naruto thought bitterly, I won't be able to see a damn thing and will **screw up**!

"Fine..." Naruto grudgingly said before scooping up the cleaning supplies and placing them upon the nearby couch. "But...I don't even know what to do first."

"Just go outside and scrub off the windows, Naruto." Sasuke glanced back at the couch and then handed Naruto the bucket, towels, a kitchen sponge, and Windex (where the hell did that come from anyway?). "All you'll have to do is splash some water and soap on them, wait a few seconds, then wipe it thoroughly off with some towels until all the cobwebs and dust are wiped away. Once all that is done, I'd suggest squirting some of that Windex on them; it's supposed to clean off the glass and allow more light through...or something like that."

Naruto, although annoyed with having to do the hard work, gave him a salute before sarcastically saying, "Yes sir! I'm off to do all the hard work while you sit here on your ass with the laptop you brought along!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes at that. But he also couldn't help but wonder how Naruto realized he brought the laptop along. After all, he was going to check out some more fanfiction about himself to make sure SOME PEOPLE actually got his personality right in their work. But it's not like he wasn't going to do any work at all. He did plan to do something exhausting:

Checking the chimney for any dust, cobwebs, or burnt ashes. It was strange though, Sasuke never once realized that the house even **had** a chimney! Maybe it was built on after he left the village...? Yeah, let's go along with that idea!

"Naruto..."

"Ugh, whatever. But, seriously though, I'm going to need some water for this bucket and at least a flashlight or something!"

Sasuke grabbed some towels and tucked them under his arm, as Naruto awaited for his not-so-fast response, he then shrugged his shoulders and looked back at him.

"Well, there's a SINK in the kitchen, and my dad used to keep a flashlight in the main bedroom's closet. Just go and find everything yourself, I have to go clean out the random chimney I **never** noticed before.

_**[XXXXX]**_

"_I always have to look for things myself! Sasuke could have at least been a GOOD host and showed me around! I don't even know where the hell to go in this dump that once belonged to his parents!_" Naruto inwardly ranted while pulling back the kitchen screen and stepping in, in somewhat of a huff. "_And it isn't even like I WANT to be helping him clean this place out: I only wanted him back here in the village for his own good. But now he's acting like I'm just his bitch! That sounds extremely _wrong_ but it's true! And why is it that I keep agreeing to help him? I shouldn't...but for some reason..._"

Oh god, his mind was just in a state of confusion and stress. Naruto couldn't handle trying to register all of what was happening. He just went over to the sink and started pouring water into the bucket that really was as lightweight as it kept being described as.

"_I mean...I do care about him; he's a good friend. I know that Sasuke isn't as cruel as he keeps trying to make himself, EVERYONE has a heart, his may be all dark and evil still, but that will change in time. When I finally succeed in making him see that he was in fact, _wrong about everything_._" The bucket was finally filled with warm water, Naruto switched off the faucet and proceeded to leave the room...still caught up in his thoughts. "_I'm just trying to be fair and patient with Sasuke is all, right? 'Course! Even though he's still acting like a demanding _**jackass**_, who thinks he can boss me around and I'll be submissive and put up with it, I have to keep working hard! I have to suck up my annoyance and anger with him..._"

A sigh escaped Naruto's lips and he just slowly sat the bucket down by the couch in the living room. Getting angry and ranting inside his head wouldn't get him anywhere. And it surely wouldn't advance the plot (even though it was amusing entertainment for the most part). So, he just decided to go upstairs and search for that flashlight that Sasuke told him about. Since...Sasuke had already left and was on top of the house trying to scan the chimney he never knew existed, and accidentally discovered.

...Hmm...seriously, when the hell did a CHIMNEY get there?

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Elsewhere 5:40 PM-**

"Are you even sure you know where to go? These clothes are really uncomfortable and I HATE how this fucking perverted jutsu gave me such **huge** boobs! Now we're LOST on top of that..." A kind-of-familiar blond 'woman' angrily snapped at Zetsu while creeping low behind some bushes that were conveniently growing in front of Sasuke's old home.

"Just shut up already!" Zetsu gave Deidara a fierce glare that made a sudden sharp breeze randomly blow throughout the area in a dramatic fashion. "**Think of it THIS way: I could have gone against Leader-Sama's orders and eaten you! Besides...you look kind of sexy as a woman...**"

Zetsu probably shouldn't have said that last part. Yeah, the words really awkwardly lingered in the air. Everything was deathly **silent**. Deidara's eye twitched, like about a thousand times, she then gave the plant man this really cold glare that would have definitely made him flinch if he weren't so emotionless and didn't care much about things like that.

"SEXY?" Deidara repeated MUCH louder. "OH, I'M SO GOING TO KILL SOMEONE WHEN-" There was suddenly a white hand clasped over her mouth, preventing her from ranting anymore.

Deidara had no choice but to shut up. But he (well...SHE at the moment because of this transformation). Although still mad as hell, she still glanced at the plant man while waiting for some kind of explanation from him. But all she received was an annoyed look by Zetsu's dark half, while his white half was kind of flustered and mumbling stuff that could not be heard.

"**Deidara, listen, I'm sure this is the place because we've been here several times in the past few days. You're just as bad as Zetsu, being a total jackass and trying to find faults in all of my genius plans. See, look up on the roof and you'll find the youngest of the brothers looking down that random chimney I never knew existed!**"

Deidara slipped away and removed the hand from his mouth. Now, feeling somewhat excited that he was about to encounter that bastard again and get a second chance with him, he turned around and looked to see that...yes...Sasuke was in fact up on the roof and trying to get a good look down the chimney.

"If we just stay hidden and carefully strategize our moves, we can do what we were planning to do all along. And you can even have a rematch with Itachi's stuck-up brother..." Zetsu's white half spoke up, hoping to motivate Deidara with this information so he would still stay and help with the plan.

Now, Deidara just stayed silent for once. But she still looked back over at the roof and grinned evilly. Zetsu was right. It was his chance to kill Sasuke THIS TIME around!

Now, all they had to do was **wait** for a chance to try and enter the house. Even though that seemed really stupid when the fact that Zetsu had the ability to walk through various matter like a freaking ghost was taken into consideration...

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Sasuke's Home 5:49 PM-**

You know how sometimes, when you first enter a house you've never been in before and you get lost happens? This would be one of those times! Naruto was pretty much now aimlessly wondering all over the dump trying to find Sasuke's parents old bedroom. It proved to be a much more difficult task than what one would think at first.

You see, every part of this house was dark because most of the power had been cut off a while ago. And from what Naruto COULD see in the darkness, there was mainly a whole lot of dust and cobwebs hanging around. Old, deserted and toppled furniture littered the floors, and he was also pretty sure that he had seen a rotting skeleton of a corpse lying in the main bathroom's shower.

The house was so quiet...so deserted...so eerie...and oh, so filthy. Naruto hated to think that it would seriously take **forever** to clean out! But, for now, he stumbled along through the halls and tried to not become utterly annoyed by this useless search for a flashlight.

Losing his cool wouldn't help anything...but why was it that Naruto felt like just losing it and confessing he HATED having to search the dark, creepy dump for a flashlight and waste precious time?

"Come on...where is that bedroom?"

His feet hit the hard floor, creating an audible creepy noise as he wandered through the hall. He slipped into more darkness as each second passed, barely even being able to see. Even though Naruto's eyes had already become adjusted to the loss of light.

"Sasuke's going to lecture me to death if I don't get out there and start washing those windows..."

...Wait...what was that sound? A soft bang was heard, and it echoed throughout the empty hall. Naruto was taken aback by this sudden sound. He froze all together in the middle of taking a step and whipped out a kunai, stealthily shuffling back against the wall.

"Who...what was that sound? Who's out there? I'm not afraid to stop you from exploring this house by force!"

Naruto waited for many seconds. But he did not get any response. He almost thought that maybe he had just imagined that sound altogether...until another same soft crash pierced his eardrums and he gasped.

"WHAT THE HELL?" Naruto looked back and forth, half expecting something or **someone** to jump out for a poorly thought out surprise attack. But then he pressed an ear to the wall and heard some more muffled noises, like someone shuffling around against the wall. "There's...there's somebody in here. I hope to god it isn't that plant hybrid guy that keeps stalking me!"

Well, standing there and freaking out would not solve anything, would it? Of course not! There could easily be some suspicious trespassers on the other side of that wall, or perhaps even some rogue nin breaking in to get information! Either way, this was one of those times when you have to gather your wits and prepare to take action! Naruto felt around in the darkness and then his eyes widened in a delighted manner when he felt another screen. SCORE! Maybe this led to the bedroom where he would find the flashlight!

Naruto did not waste any time in sliding that screen open and pretty much charging inside. He actually managed to hit the floor, roll, and jump back up onto a bed in a really **freaking awesome** way. This action was topped off in a cheesy way by him taking the kunai and twirling it coolly by the tip of his index finger.

"Mmmph..." Naruto immediately heard this muffled voice and flicked his gaze over to the closet that he could make out clear enough with the help of the slightly open window; reflecting moonlight in. "Yaki...ughhh...tiiiime..."

"...Is there someone in the closet?"

Naruto climbed off of the tousled large bed and sneaked over to the closet. From what he could see in the moonlight, the bedroom obviously used to be Sasuke's parents room. There was a picture of Fugaku and Mikoto on the wall together beside the closet. Of course, the room itself was very dusty and dirty. It also had old bloodstains along the west wall; maybe from when Itachi tried to murder them.

Pressing an ear against the closet, Naruto did hear some strange things. It sounded like something was shifting around in there and there feet was scraping the floor underneath. There were eerie scraping sounds. And to top the creepiness off officially: there was also a girl's voice lowly speaking muffled sentences. It all was a little suspicious, and maybe even a little bit chilling. Naruto slowly began to not want to find out what was in there.

...But curiosity, combined with his bold nature, won in the end.

Naruto took a deep breath and took the kunai in his hands, sticking it into the metal, chained lock on it. After thrusting it through several times, he successfully broke it and it fell to the floor with a clatter along with the knife itself.

Now, all was left to do was open the door. Naruto didn't know what he would find in that closet. He didn't know whether this was all his imagination or if it was somebody trying to break in. ...OR Zetsu; their new stalker. But he reached for the handle anyway and twisted it, pulling it open.

Two people were obviously pressed against the door. Because once Naruto opened it, a couple of girls that looked around his age came tumbling out of the closet!

"YAY~! WE'RE FREEEE~! ...OUCH! OH CRAP, I CRUSHED MY NOSE INTO THE FLOOR!"

"AAAAAAAH! THERE'S A KUNAI KNIFE STUCK IN MY RIGHT CHEEK!"

"TWO GIRLS? WHY IS THERE TOO GIRLS IN THE CLOSET? I have to tell Sasuke about this!"

Naruto promptly stepped around the two girls in pain on the floor and dashed out of the room like a madman. He **had** to find Sasuke and let him know about this accidental discovery!

_**[XXXXX]**_

"SAAAAASUKE! SASUKE! YOU HAVE SOME EXPLAINING TO DO; **RIGHT NOW!**"

There was much more nonsense being screamed by Naruto as he ran back through the house and to the first floor. All of this could he heard easily by Sasuke because he was still peering into the chimney (randomness strikes again!) to make sure it was clean. The reason why he hadn't cleaned it out SOONER, was because he was secretly previously..."examining" a fanfiction story about Naruto and a Mary Sue falling in love. But it wasn't like he wanted to. He was merely doing that for uh..."research", yeah that's a very good term that can't be taken in different ways...

Now that he had put away his laptop and got off his lazy ass, he leaned over and slipped on a pure white glove used by medics. He slipped a finger into it, covered by the protective glove, and pulled a whole big handful of these dark minerals and spider webs.

"Wow, this is going to be harder than I thought." Sasuke murmured, taking the filthy glove and carelessly throwing it off the roof of the house. He shook his head and then once again leaned over to look into the random chimney. "Well, at least Naruto's shut his mouth for a few seconds. That idiot still hasn't been out here to clean the windows and I'm getting the feeling that he's trying to-"

"**SAAAAASUKE! I HAVE TO TELL YOU SOMEEEEEETHING! ANSWER ME THIS MINUTE, DAMN IT!**"

Sasuke was actually taken by surprise at that moment. Seriously. That very loud, piercing yell was just too abnormally loud; it actually caused the house to **rumble**! And because the Uchiha had not seen this coming, he lost his balance and gasped before falling through the chimney and plummeting into a whole lot of darkness and ashes!

From behind their convenient bush that was also rather obvious, Zetsu and Deidara exchanged bewildered looks as Sasuke's choking and gagging got more and more muffled. One thought came to mind: that was a LONG way down!

_**[XXXXX]**_

Feet hit the floor from the stairs violently, you could pretty much assume that the rug in front of the staircase had caught on fire from it. Naruto just continued to ran and burst into the living room, coming to a skidding stop by the fireplace that he hadn't ever seen before while panting and trying to regain his breath back.

And the minute he did so, a VERY pissed off Sasuke pretty much crawled out from the fireplace and glared daggers at Naruto.

"Sasuke! Listen to me, I don't know if you're aware or not, but there's t-" Naruto trailed off nervously as Sasuke got up to his feet and gestured to himself before putting his hands on his hips. A sweatdrop formed on Naruto's head and he stared in shock. "Uh...what happened to you?"

"You're screaming! LOOK at what you've done to me now!" Sasuke indignantly snapped. A dark aura was evilly radiating off of him...anime style. It somewhat did manage to break that poor, abused **forth wall** though.

Naruto just flinched and then took a good look at his friend/old teammate/temporary-roommate/assumed lover and couldn't help but get on the verge of laughing. He had to cover his mouth so he wouldn't erupt with laughter and anger Sasuke even more. It was already safe to believe that he was already mad as hell for accidentally falling into the chimney.

You see, Sasuke was pretty much totally covered in black ash. His hair was all crazy, spider webs stuck to his skin, and he was glaring evilly. Naruto didn't know why...but for some reason, his glaring made it all the more funnier for him!

"You made me fall into that chimney! And it was NOT fun in any way possible! I'm covered head to toe in black...and you're obviously fighting back laughter!"

"I-I'm...sorry...uh..." Naruto wiped tears of laughter away, and Sasuke just huffed and started wiping all the ash off. "FORGET THIS! Sasuke, two girls just CAME OUT OF THE CLOSET!"

Sasuke misinterpreted everything that Naruto just explained. He sighed and waved a hand in a dismissive manner before walking over to the kitchen screen to go get some water. "That's great. I hope they're compatible together. Remind them that I'm behind their relationship **one-hundred percent**..."

Naruto literally gave himself a facepalm. His hand slowly fell down his face and turned around and stared blankly. "They didn't come out in THAT way! I mean it LITERALLY! There seriously is two girls that just came out of your parents closet!"

Sasuke now understood...well, he thought he did. But Naruto really made this all sound much more differently than what it was. But, however, this was Naruto after all. So, Sasuke turned back around to see his unintelligent blonde friend folding his arms and tapping his foot irritatedly.

"Soooo...WHEN were you planning on telling me about your two little girlfriends?" Naruto asked angrily, looking more like a scolding mother than a teenage boy. "Did you just leave them in there to ROT after you were done playing with them? Or do you have this secret life going on that I'm not aware of...?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes. Why was it that it seemed like finally being able to BEGIN cleaning this house would take years to accomplish...?

_**[XXXXX]**_

"Are you sure you weren't just imagining things, Naruto? There seriously was two girls that fell out of the closet?" Sasuke asked a little uneasily, holding a lit flashlight and a katana...just incase things got a little ugly.

"Positive." Naruto was walking ahead of Sasuke (actually, they were more like; creeping through the hall) while holding some kunai between each finger on his hands threateningly and ready for aim. "Don't doubt me; I DO have my moments of awareness..."

"But those moments don't happen too often of course."

"WHAT ARE YOU IMPLYING?"

There was a little bit longer of a walk, and the weird and unlikely twosome arrived outside the door and promptly fell back flat against the wall.

They pressed their ears tight to the walls, hoping to hear anything going on in there. But what they heard, however, soothed their restless state slightly. Beautiful singing hit their ears. The voice was feminine and hypnotizing; Sasuke recognized this voice as the same one from that strange and realistic **dream** he had. But what was confusing is this: this person was singing.

"_**I hate it when a guy doesn't answer the door...**_

_**Even when I told him yesterday and the day before...**_

_**I hate it when a guy doesn't get the tab, and I have to pull my money out and that makes me look bad...**_

_**Where are the hopes, where are the dreams...**_

_**My Cinderella story scene...**_

_**When do you think they'll finally see...**_

_**That you're not not not gonna get any better!**_

_**You won't won't won't you won't get rid of me never...**_

_**Like it or not, even though she's a lot like me...**_

_**We're not the same!**_

_**And yeah-**_"

"MISAKI! JUST SHUT UP!"

"...What? I can't help that I love that song, little sis. And besides: I have to sing it because I declared previously when we were released from the closet that it was my new theme song, duh."

"Oh yeah...that...well, I think we can come out now. After all, I think Itachi is long gone from here."

"But he wouldn't have been able to get us anyway, Miyako."

Naruto and Sasuke sucked in deep breaths and then exhaled.

"Charge in on three." Sasuke stated quietly. He then proceeded to count down. "One...two...THREE..."

_**[XXXXX]**_

Two teenage girls, who were the ones that fell out from the closet thanks to Naruto, both sat on their knees on the floor beside the bed. For some strange reason, they both had small cups of steaming tea and were taking sips calmly as if nothing strange was going on at all.

"I wonder when that blonde guy will return..." Misaki commented while smiling a tad. "We need to think him for rescuing us from that closet. I still can't believe we've been in that closet for YEARS though..."

Miyako, who was Misaki's sister, nodded in agreement and then set her cup of tea down. "I don't know when he'll be back...but he was kind of cute. I wonder if Sasuke's gotten cute...it has been several years after all. I was also BARELY even able to have enough power to contact Sasuke through his dream."

"Well, Miyako, that's true. But we won't know unless the blonde guy and Sasuke burst into this bedroom from **that door** over there."

All of a sudden, as if on a cue, Naruto and Sasuke charged into the door and broke it down. This stunned the two sisters and they sprung up to their feet out of habit and got into defensive stances.

"BURN IN HELL,YOU STALKERS!" Naruto yelled, throwing all ten kunai at the two girls.

"We're not 'stalkers'!" Misaki was able to dodge all the kunai, she did a backflip to the bed and the knives only cut through her hair on the side and took at least four small pieces. Miyako wasn't so lucky, she dodged seven knives by jumping back; the other three had bounced off the wall, to the ceiling, against Sasuke's katana, and pierced into her left arm.

"Then you're...THIEVES! Hiding out in this closet and locking yourselves inside because you're trying to throw us off!" Naruto charged at Misaki and punched her in the cheek. She was sent back flying into the wall and fell off the bed.

"WE ARE NOT THIEVES!"

"That's what they all say!" Sasuke, by this time, had decided to attack Miyako since she was already injured and trying to pull the knives from her arm. He quickly took the katana and held it out to her, a brief blue light of electricity lit up the room and the next thing poor Miyako knew: she was struck with small-yet-powerful Chidori attack.

Meanwhile, Misaki jumped back up to her feet and decided to fight back. It was the only thing she could do to knock some sense into this guy! She attempted to kick Naruto, but he had swiftly spun around and jumped over and behind her on the bed; grabbing her wrists and roughly pulling her hands and arms behind her. This action caused her to start resisting in kicking back in pain, but Naruto didn't release his hold on her.

And, an injured Miyako, lied there on the floor and weakly pulling twitching from the lightning attack. She raised her head up and glared evilly at Sasuke, as he came closer to her and grabbed her by her hair and pulled her up to his eye level. This would have been one of those moments when one would grin in triumph or perhaps say something really cocky and be a jackass. But...Sasuke couldn't do either because he was surprised when Miyako closed her eyes and then they flickered open.

Miyako had Sharingan eyes...

And, back to Naruto and Misaki over on the other side of the room by the bed: Naruto pulled the struggling Misaki back closer to him and he lowered his head to her shoulder. His mouth was by her ear and his breathing hit it in a creepy fashion. In only a matter of seconds, Naruto stated this one sentence: "You just got owned."

In a state of rage, Misaki closed her eyes. She hated losing. She couldn't stand losing a fight because it made her seem weak. Being weak was one of the things she despised the most. After a good ten seconds, she turned her head back a little too look at Naruto right in the eyes, and opened her own once again.

Her once-onyx eyes similar to Sasuke's were now red and had black marks that were all too obvious. Naruto immediately lessened his grip on her a little, seeing what she was about to do. This girl had Sharingan eyes! So, was she an Uchiha or something?

"...Your eyes..." Sasuke released Miyako and she fell down flat on her face. She didn't get hurt all that much though, she was already pretty numb all over from the Chidori attack he gave her. Sasuke looked back at Naruto and motioned for him to let her go. "Naruto, there's something strange going on here. Unless these two girls are living Mary-Sues, there's no way they could have the Sharingan. Release her, there's going to be a few things I'm going to have to question them on."

Naruto didn't understand what was going on. But could you blame him? Anyway, he helped Misaki up to her feet nevertheless and made sure she wasn't too badly injured. And he quietly said to her that he had heard her singing and doubted that she could be evil since her voice was so beautiful. He hoped that saying this would make her LESS pissed at him.

"You sure do have to ask them some questions." Naruto suddenly spoke up, walking over to Sasuke and put a hand on his shoulder in a somewhat comforting fashion. Although he was annoyed by the action and resisted it. "EVERY TIME we start to become that all the Uchihas are wiped out, they come back crawling out of the woodwork! You guys all make me so glad that **I** don't come from a clan that's got an infamous reputation!"

Sasuke, Misaki, and Miyako all looked over at Naruto in a mix of annoyance and pity. But he shrugged it all off as usual. His words were true anyway. At least he didn't have any members of his own clan randomly entering the picture, accidentally discovered by others in CLOSETS!

Misaki sighed and softly took a seat on the bed. She avoided eye contact with everyone and placed her hands on her knees. "Uh-huh...now, I guess it's about time we explain why we're here. Do you want with or without flashbacks included...?"

"NO FLASHBACKS!" Naruto suddenly announced in a state of panic. Although amused by this, Misaki put back on a poker face and begun to tell the long and boring story.

...This could take a while...

_**Continued.**_

_**[XXXXX]**_

_**The story will be cut short and will be in the next chapter. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the chapter. It was fun to write as usual, but I have this feeling that something's missing. I have the feeling that there needs to be more fanfiction-reading scenes in between Naruto and Sasuke's quest to clean out the "dump" as the former calls it. ^^' But, their goals to clean out the house is the story's...sideplot. So, yeah.**_

_**But don't worry, after Misaki and Miyako's introductions, there will be more fanfiction coming. Along with Zetsu and Deidara's stalking, a visit from Shikamaru and then Kakashi again, random bursting out into song moments, and some explanations about lemons! Can someone say...insanity? Lol.**_

**SONGS USED (WHICH I DO NOT OWN EITHER):**

**Behind Those Eyes by 3 Doors Down. (But it's been a while since I've heard that song. So...I might have gotten the lyrics wrong because I wrote them down by memory...)**

**The Best Damn Thing by Avril Lavigne. (I was listening to it while writing. And to me, it describes Misaki's true, hidden personality.)**

_**Read and review! :]**_


	8. Enter The Survivors

**_Author's Note:_ _The eighth chapter! Um...I don't really have much to say. However, I have a little question for you after the chapter. ^^ I would appreciate it if you could take the time to answer._**

_**Enjoy the insanity~**_

_**Disclaimer: Ugh, Naruto doesn't and never will belong to me. *Rubs the back of my head and glances at the nearby manga volumes on my desk* But it is safe to say that I'm a fan, and I am sad it isn't mine. *Wipes away anime tears with the back of my hand***_

_**[XXXXX]**_

_**The Many Horrors of Fanfiction!**_

_**Chapter Eight: Enter The Survivors**_

Sometimes, unexpected situations occur. Situations that are very Hell-ish and like a living nightmare. For example: the night Itachi lost it and murdered "everyone" in the Uchiha clan.

But THEN, there some times there are those very lucky people who survived. Shaken, maybe traumatized, but they are still standing in one piece. And they have to try and build their life back, especially if they were like Misaki and Miyako and foolishly got locked up in a bedroom closet for several years! Naruto Uzumaki and Sasuke Uchiha were previously trying to clean out an old home and find out some things about the horrors of **Fanfiction**, on the side. But now that they have discovered these two survivors, their previous goals will have to placed on an abrupt hold.

These two girls they have accidentally discovered seem strange. And have odd Mary-Sue-ish traits. How exactly will Naruto and Sasuke be able to help these two get their lives back on track? And who is this mysterious person in the shadows? Meanwhile, what the hell are **lemons** anyway?

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Sasuke Uchiha's Old Home 6:41 PM-**

"And that was how it all happened." Misaki finished with a sigh. She lied down on the bed with her hands behind her head, gazing blankly at the ceiling above her. "We didn't mean to startle you. But...if I hadn't have contacted you through that dream, Sasuke, then we wouldn't have been able to have any hope you were around to help us."

A silence overcame everyone. Sasuke sat on the edge of the bed across from Misaki, Naruto was leaning by the closet, and Miyako was on the floor trying to clean up their spilled tea.

According to Misaki, this was their story: the two of them were, yes, part of the Uchiha clan. Something of distant cousins from Sasuke. Their childhood was fairly normal, they didn't have many friends and they fought very hard during their secret training sessions. They were talented, and could have easily become official ninja one day after graduating.

But, then Itachi had to go and kill the clan. This event screwed up their lives, according to Miyako's depressing commentary. From what the younger sister mentioned, they were in their home about to go back to their room after finishing dinner. Then they had noticed a shadow of someone, slip past the window from the outside. And the next thing they knew, many kunai knives had whirled just barely over their heads and into the screen. They were shocked. Too shocked to react. Itachi had broken the window even more and slipped inside. The two of them were very scared, they did manage to escape the house though, when their mother quickly used herself as a diversion for Itachi. She jumped into the middle and attempted to fight him back (she failed and got killed not too long afterword).

Misaki had then went back to their story. And she added in that they were very shocked and frightened to see how much destruction there was. What, you know, when the fact that several bloody corpses lying around was realized. The two sisters had stumbled upon Sasuke's home, and had hid inside in order to save themselves. But as fate would have it, Itachi had showed up in the place not too long after; Fugaku and Mikoto were shocked extremely, but ordered the two to hide upstairs somewhere safe while they ran out. And Misaki and Miyako had done just that. They managed to find their bedroom and locked themselves up in the closet; but before this, they had placed a very strong lock on it.

"So, have you two just been hiding in that closet for all these YEARS?" Naruto asked in shock, barely being able to believe all that he had just been informed of. "That sound really impossible to me...I mean, neither of you had food or water. You probably couldn't breath either! And...wouldn't your bladders have exploded or something?"

Miyako sighed deeply. "It's...complicated to explain in a good enough way, Naruto! Let's just put it this way: we couldn't have possibly survived any longer if you hadn't discovered us. I don't know about Misaki, but I know that **I **was really thirsty and starving. Mmm...the tea we found was good. Now I'm craving some miso ramen..."

Naruto couldn't help but agree that having some miso ramen at the moment WOULD be very great. And he thanked Miyako for giving him the idea to run off from this family moment and get some. He quickly slipped over to the door and nearly put his hand on it when Sasuke cleared his throat.

"Naruto, Miyako, FORGET the ramen and get back to the **topic**..." Naruto and Miyako exchanged disappointed glances. "This still doesn't make any sense. I don't ever remember encountering either of you before, and nobody has ever mentioned you to me."

"Well, it was for the best anyway." Misaki commented shyly, raising herself up and folding her arms. "Me and Miyako didn't ever get out of the house much. And, as a result, we both have really sucky ways with people most of the time. We don't know all that much about socializing. Miyako is not as bad as me, she actually did have a friend to talk to sometimes when she was four. But I never have had a friendship with anyone."

Wow, Naruto **really** wanted to get the hell out of there. Listening to that girl go on and on in her dull little monotone, that was strangely beautiful and hypnotizing after a while, was like a certain kind of torture. And, besides, this all shouldn't really involve him. Sasuke is related to them. He isn't. So, why was he even there in the first place?

They were wasting so much time with this dramatic introduction. Although Naruto didn't possess much intelligence, he could see that it was pointless! They should be using this time to try and clean out the wreak of house they currently were standing in!

"Well, you two can come out of hiding!" Naruto chimed in happily. "Itachi's dead, the entire clan other than you and Sasuke are wiped out, the village is still standing, and we might be free of insanity for a little while until more antagonists appear out of the blue!"

"...That was right to the point." Miyako commented, smiling. She then thought for a minute and gasped. "Wait! Misaki! The clan is all wiped out? This means that...it's doomed forever! It will die!"

Miyako then promptly started pacing and hysterically naming off several terrible scenarios of how her, Misaki, and Sasuke would all die suddenly and the clan be totally gone. How it wouldn't be able to live and return to it's former, superior glory. But this severely annoyed Sasuke, Naruto, and Misaki. They all stared at her with deadpan looks.

"I always had so much hope for this clan! I wanted nothing more than it to be the most-populated and respected one in the village, now LOOK at what happened!" Miyako finished, finally ending her pacing and sulking over to the bed to lie down. This prompted her to groan and hold her head. "We three are the only survivors...and that can only mean that this clan is doomed forever to be extinct..."

"But what's so bad about that?" Naruto chimed in once again, walking over to her and sitting by her on the edge of the bed. "I mean, to me, it seems like most of the members of the clan were all power-obsessed and way too stuck-up perfect! Why would you want to restore that kind of clan? It all sounds like a mixed up dramatic/angsty fanfiction!"

"Miyako just likes to jump to conclusions, Naruto. That's the impression I'm receiving." Sasuke explained carefully like he was talking to a small child. Naruto gave him a glare after this. He knew he wasn't THAT slow. "But...she actually is kind of accurate. And it is all like a terrible fanfiction; there's no hope left for our clan and we can't really do anything about it..."

The room fell totally silent once again.

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Elsewhere In The Leaf 7:05 PM-**

"WHEN will we make our move?" Deidara complained in a hushed tone. "I can't keep up the jutsu forever...besides, I'm hating very freaking minute of this crossdressing act! I mean, it's USELESS! Wherever the hell Leader-Sama got this idea, I'll never understand! What am I here for anyway? **Eye candy?**"

"**Deidara, just shut the hell up! We have to wait to make our move; you should know this!**"

"Don't talk to him that way, Zetsu!" Zetsu's white half suddenly snapped, taking a hand and punching the other side's shoulder.

"**Why don't you make your goddamned self USEFUL, and shut your yap so we don't draw attention to ourselves?**"

"That's very mature, Zetsu. Very, very, very mature actually. I am beyond impressed..."

"**Who's mature now? Sarcasm is for the immature, DUH!**"

"That happens to be an old thought! Take a history lesson!"

"**Stop rambling about all that bullshit!**"

"JERK!"

"**DUMBASS!**"

Deidara's eye twitched repeatedly and she took a look at Zetsu aimlessly arguing with himself. She was beyond irritated. This was like an everyday occurrence for him since...well...since the day he became a part of the Akatsuki probably. And to make matters worse, he couldn't just be quiet with these arguments.

They to freaking be INSANELY LOUD! So loud and unmistakable, that Deidara was shocked no one had come over to discover them yet. Well, truth be told, she didn't want to stick around with him and find out just how they would get discovered. Without a second thought, the blond-haired crossdresser slipped away from their hiding place and walked off down the village streets.

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-Sasuke Uchiha's Old Home 7:11 PM-**

Naruto, Sasuke, Misaki, and Miyako all walked out of the bedroom and made their way into the hall. Now that there was more light, the two friends/rivals/old teammates/temporary-roommates/assumed lovers got to get a good look at the sisters.

Misaki was Sasuke's height. She had short, dark raven hair that went to her cheeks and had a nice amount of volume to it. Her onyx eyes were slanted a little bit, giving her a very serious and sharp gaze. Her skin was pale, possibly due to being cooped up inside of the closet for about eleven or-so years. She wore brown netting across her stomach and arms and neck, under a crimson sleeveless top that barely covered her stomach. She also wore worn gloves, a black skirt with brown netting underneath, and brown shinobi sandals. Her forehead protector wasn't visible, she didn't wear hers. Misaki was seventeen, and was somewhat anti-social most of the time. She is also tough, doesn't really take crap from anyone and would probably punch Sasuke's lights out if informed her of Itachi's real intentions for murdering everyone.

Miyako was a little bit taller than Misaki. She had somewhat long hair raven hair with a blue-ish tint to her shoulders, tied back in two ponytails with dark purple ribbons, it was also spiked on the ends. Her onyx eyes were not slanted and were big and almost sparkling with curiosity at everything around her. Her skin was getting to be very pale like her sister's; thankfully it wasn't too bad yet. She wore a long sleeved dark purple with a midnight blue flower patterns around the neck, dark green short shorts with black netting covering her exposed legs, and gray shinobi sandals. She did wear her forehead protector, it was proudly placed around the obvious place. Miyako was sixteen. She had an odd personality, **yandere**, if you will. She also had a random side that didn't come out too often. Fighting was something she loved to do, and it seemingly made her world go 'round.

"So, we just explained ourselves while walking out of the room." Sasuke recapped for no reason at all. "And, now, you know more about us and we know more about you. But I'm still a little shocked by this discovery..."

Miyako smiled warmly and walked over to Sasuke, and proceeded to wrap a friendly arm around his neck. He just gave her an icy look as she did so. "No need to be so suspicious! We're all family here, so it's very much okay! All we need to do is figure out where me and Misaki will live. Then, there's something I'm going to have to inform you of."

"Why can't we live here?"

Everyone looked over at Misaki as she asked that totally stupid question. Noticing their looks, the oldest sister immediately understood why. Because Naruto and Sasuke were still trying to clean out the place so the latter could officially move in. That made sense.

But where would they stay for the time being? If Sasuke moved back into his old home, that meant that the two might be able to stay with him until a new home for them was constructed. But there were flaws to this plan: very obvious and understandable ones. Mostly about how their distant cousin didn't know much about them even after this awkward **accidental family reunion**.

Naruto snapped a finger in a random manner. He suddenly thought of a great plan! "Hey you guys, I suddenly thought of a **great plan**!" The Uchihas blinked and gazed over at him. "I don't feel comfortable with having you two girls stay with me at my place, much less Sasuke, so that impulsive idea was crushed before it could ever begin. However...I know someone trustworthy whom will accept you both, Misaki and Miyako."

Hey, that really did sound logical. Very well-thought out too, Sasuke had to inwardly admit. He watched as Misaki and Miyako glanced at each other and then smiled in relief. They accepted that offer immediately of course. ...Then Miyako randomly yelled at Naruto for making her cut her face on a kunai knife when she fell from the closet.

Hmm...perhaps this would all work out. Best of all, Sasuke got his way. Now he wouldn't have to suffer Misaki and Miyako staying with him and Naruto. Maybe this did sound a little...selfish...and gay...but he did kind of want it to be **just** him and that idiot together. All alone. In that semi-spacious, cluttered/disorganized house. Thinking of all this was causing Sasuke to get lost within his own thoughts.

"_**I'm bringing sexy back...them other boys don't know-**_"

"Naruto!"

Naruto snickered evilly and then waved his hand in a dismissively manner at Sasuke. He loved singing that song to annoy him. But this time, he did have a reason for it. His temporary roommate was just staring off aimlessly into space after all!

Seeing this little moment gave Misaki and Miyako this odd feeling. It was like a combination of amusement and suspense. Assuming her usual "thinking position" with her left hand rubbing across her chin and the other's index finger tapping the corner of her lip, Miyako noted that this scene felt so familiar and...interesting. Also, why did Sasuke's cheeks suddenly appear to be a tad bit more pinker than they were before...?

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-The Marketplace 7:20 PM-**

"Coming back to life wasn't worth this! Damn it! I didn't know I'd get wrapped up in this stupid 'comeback' of revenge and all that crap!"

Deidara wandered throughout the deadly silent marketplace alone. Although she would probably be worried about all the perverts coming out for some action, she just needed to get away and transform back.

There was nobody in sight. And no patrolling ANBU. Perfect. Deidara slipped around to the darkest alley beside a fruit stand and pressed her fingers together.

Smoke fizzled around and formed a very hard to see through cloud. It disappeared after a few seconds though. And Deidara emerged from it. He no longer was under the damn transformation and was once again a guy. His blond hair was once again tied up a high ponytail and he wore the Akatsuki robe and clothes underneath...WAIT...since WHEN was he wearing that when he killed himself? Ugh, no matter, as long as he could slip back through the village then nobody would be able to recognize him as an enemy.

"I need to be getting back to Zetsu, un. But I...I don't really think I even need his help now. The only reason I suggested I follow him around for the 'comeback' was so I could slip away and find that little Uchiha bastard and finally succeed in killing him for real." Deidara glanced up at the clouds moving around and covering the moon, setting the village into an even darker state. "I could make a clay bird and **stalk** him that way, un. But once those clouds move away, I'll have trouble not being too inconspicuous..."

"Are you talking about your plans out loud...where we can all hear you?"

That sudden female voice snapped Deidara out of his out-loud thinking. He considered what he should do: his options were either to turn around and find out who had suddenly detected him, or make a very sudden and loud explosion to kill the person and then probably get caught. Which one was better? Well, he really didn't know. And as if it were a bad crime Fanfiction, Deidara realized there was no choice but to find out who this was.

Turning around fully, Deidara immediately found himself looking at a seventeen year old girl whom...strangely looked extremely familiar somehow. This girl had long blond hair that was pulled back in a long curved ponytail to her back, a fringe covered one eye. Her visible eye was a very light blue color. Her outfit was kind of revealing and mostly a purple color. And if it wasn't obvious enough by this freaking useless description; she was Ino.

The two just stared at each other. Totally awkward silence ensued as they carefully studied the others' appearance.

Only when they heard some random singing did they actually look away.

"_**It's not what I took from you...**_

_**It's not what I stole...**_

_**We are born like this...**_

_**Like this...**_

_**The time has come to change this...**_

_**To stretch the thought a mile...**_

_**We've lost that kind of spirit-**_"

"WHY are you singing that song, Naruto?"

"Huh?"

"SASUKE JUST ASKED YOU WHY YOU WERE SINGING THAT SONG! GEEZ! ARE YOU DEAF OR SOMETHING?"

"I'm not deaf, Miyako! And, Sasuke, I don't really know why I was singing. I thought singing would, you know, lighten the silence as we walk to her house!"

"...That's a good theory. I will admit that. And...cough...that song **is** more awesome than that stupid **Sexyback**. Let's talk about some things instead of talking."

"Yeah! That's cool! We have SO many topics to discuss and settle: your theme song, Misaki's theme song, Fanfiction, and how we will totally clean out that old dump of a house that once belonged to your parents..."

Naruto, Sasuke, Misaki, and Miyako all walked through the marketplace past the alley Deidara and Ino were still in. They were discussing random things pretty much, and didn't even notice the two look-alikes.

"Ahhh...well, this is kind of awkward, isn't it?" Ino spoke up after clearing her throat. She glanced away in embarrassment and put her hands on her hips.

"It's very awkward, un. You look like such a **slut**..."

Ino's eyes widened in shock rapidly. She whirled around angrily and scowled. "WHAT? You're the slut! I've seen you walking around this village with...with that plant/hybrid...thing...! Who's that guy supposed to be? Your bitch?"

"I couldn't care less about him, un! And what makes you think you can pull off that hairstyle with **those ****clothes**?" Deidara snapped.

The argument was on! Even though, they had no idea who the person was, they just couldn't get over the way the other person was "murdering the look". And this earned them plenty of "what the fuck?" looks from passing villagers. Because from a certain angle, they both looked like siblings or something. It's a good thing that Naruto, Sasuke, Misaki, and Miyako already passed them.

"I'll have you know that I look sexy in these clothes!"

"You call that 'sexy', un?"

"Damn right I do!"

"Well, to be blunt about this, you're murdering that look altogether, un! Please, I know a woman who doesn't socialize much, and still looked a hell of a lot sexier than you!"

"Who is this woman?"

"Can't tell you, un. That information is confidential at the moment...the POINT is-"

"WHAT IS YOUR POINT?"

"STOP SCREECHING, UN! MY EARS ARE BLEEDING NOW!"

"**GOOD!**"

"You're such a bitch, un! I've had enough of this!"

"What are you going to do? Slap me? You're wearing an Akatsuki cloak...and I would assume that because of this fact you're from a powerful organization and could possibly murder me...and I have this strange feeling that I've seen you somewhere before...but, wait, this doesn't matter! What kind of crappy attack are you going to hit me with? An **explosion**?"

"...What made you guess that, un?"

_**[XXXXX]**_

**-With Naruto, Sasuke, Miyako, and Misaki Where Things Were Making At Least A Little Bit Of Sense 7:49 PM-**

Inside Sakura's bedroom: Sakura sat at her computer, Naruto was sitting by the window on a large blue pillow, Sasuke was leaning by the door in a bored and totally uninterested manner, and Misaki and Miyako were sitting side-by-side on the bed. Everyone had cups of steaming, delicious tea that was soothing their restless states. Ultimately reducing them to very calm and composed state.

It was a good thing that Sakura still had that tea recipe, or else she would have a bunch of freaking out friends(...?) in her bedroom at this very moment.

Before this, when everyone took the opportunity to pile in, Naruto and Sasuke did not wait to explain what was going on! When Sakura asked them what was going on, they quickly started talking.

So they went into very long and professional detail about Misaki and Miyako's situation. It would be way too much of a hassle to try and mention all of what was said, so that will be skipped. And the two sisters even threw in a little bit of comments. They also explained that they didn't try to leave the closet sooner because the lock was too strong. Literally, they were trapped for many years. But it's all good, because they were at least able to survive with some tea and the dust that built up inside.

It goes without saying, but Sakura was very stunned by what she had just heard. She didn't want to show her concern, and tried to remain calm and totally cool. But she lost it and did an accidental spit-take with her tea when Naruto finished this explanation by pretty much saying that he didn't want Misaki and Miyako to live with him, because he wanted to be "**alone**" with Sasuke (insert dirty joke here).

"W-wow..." Sakura laughed nervously as everyone started staring at her with bewildered expressions from the way she randomly spat out the tea. She shrugged the looks off, and took the towel Misaki had acquired from god-knows-where and threw at her to clean up the steamy liquid on the floor.

"I don't mean to ask too much of you, Sakura, but you're the only person I know who would do this kind of favor!" Naruto said, walking over to her and firmly grabbing her shoulders and bringing her up to stare intensely in his eyes. You could easily tell he was now on the verge of indignantly pleading for her to help them out. "You HAVE to agree to this whole thing! I don't want my apartment being filled with a bunch of people like it's a freaking HOTEL for emos!" By the last part, Sasuke and Misaki were both glaring icily at Naruto. Miyako, on the other hand, was chuckling because she knew his description of them was true. But then she scowled evilly when she realized Naruto was also talking about her.

"Misaki and Miyako have no other options; they're Sasuke's survivor cousins who can't find any place that could be titled 'liveable' and/or 'homey'!"

Sakura bit her lip and backed away from Naruto's pleading eyes. She sighed and thought about this very carefully: if she were to allow the two to stay with her for the time being, she would be doing the right thing. She would he helpful. And most of all, have actually done something good. But if she did not agree to this, she would probably have to suffer Naruto's annoying freaking out! Oh, what to do, what to do? Which would be better?

"Sakura, we don't mean to have to pressure you like this." Miyako sweetly mentioned, closing her eyes and allowing a warm smile creep up to her cheeks like a spider. Sakura was surprised by how she didn't all cold and uncaring like Sasuke and Misaki. She actually smiled back at her. But that's when Miyako's eyes snapped open fast and she stood atop the bed and pulled out a huge blood-stained katana "BUT LISTEN TO THE GUY! CAN'T YOU UNDERSTAND OUR SITUATION? DAMMIT, WE AREN'T ASKING ALL THAT MUCH FROM YOU! JUST GIVE ME AND MY SISTER A PLACE TO STAY, GOD! YOU PEOPLE ARE ALL SO SELFISH! WHY WON'T YOU DIEEEE~?"

Everyone except Misaki were staring at the poor girl. Now finished with her unexpected rant, she panted and gasped for air. When breathing was easy again, she cleared her throat and then calmly took a seat as delicately as possible on the bed she looked at the katana in her hands and threw it over into Sasuke's hands.

"...You'll all get used to this." Misaki informed knowingly, raising a finger and then taking the other hand and wrapping it around her sister's neck. Roughly, she punched it, and Miyako let out a gasp before she closed her eyes and fell forward, limp, on her face. "Miyako has random outbursts, just to let you all know. Sometimes she has these unexplainable yandere-moments. Just give her a swift punch to her back or a nerve, and she'll fall into an unconscious state. When she awakens later, she won't remember the outburst at all; so for the sake of my comfort, don't remind her what occurred. Are we all clear?"

Sasuke was still intently staring at the weapon in his hands. He just knew that somehow, Miyako hadn't even had this thing on her when she got angry. For some reason, she seemed Sue-ish to him. But this was a thought he didn't share with anybody at the moment. He couldn't all of a sudden assume his two distant cousins whom he never heard of before were such horrifying Fanfiction beasts. He just mumbled an answer to Misaki's question and slipped the katana out the door of Sakura's bedroom.

A little bit later, things seemed to have calmed down. Miyako was still out cold on the floor, and everyone else started taking more long sips of the soothing tea. When Sakura was finally calm again, she told Naruto and Sasuke that she would allow the two survivors to stay at her home. She figured that perhaps, once her mother returned back from her trip, she would introduce Misaki and Miyako and explain their story. It was a good high chance that her mother would agree to let them live their just temporarily. When Naruto questioned why she had to tell her mom, Sakura just gave him a good 'are you freaking kidding me?' kind of look, and Misaki chimed in saying that if her mom discovered them on her own...then she would jump to dramatic conclusions and think Sakura was **together** with them.

Naruto didn't understand what Misaki was implying. The older, more stable, sister facepalmed.

"Well, It's still good to know that you're on our side." Misaki spoke up, attempting to smile as she looked up at Sakura from where she sat on the bed. "But, are you positive that you have no problems with me and Miyako staying here...temporarily?"

"It's no trouble! Besides, there's a guest room that isn't used often anyway. And you can actually get out and about to see how much the village has changed after all these years." Sakura sat down beside Misaki on the bed and gave her a warm smile.

"Actually," Sakura and Misaki turned their heads a little to see Naruto suddenly sitting cross-legged on the bed in front of them. They gasped in surprise and inched away. "The village has been through a lot of hell! With wars, attacks, giant snakes, emos, the Akatsuki, Granny's constant anger problems, the many perverts, fanfiction, and the fact that we suddenly have acquired modern technology, the village still hasn't changed much. So, you wouldn't really have much to see in the daytime..."

Sakura's warm smile was immediately replaced with a blank expression and before she could respond, Miyako's eyes fluttered open and she sat on the floor in a daze.

_**[XXXXX]**_

**~Time Skip~**

Maybe things were finally going to be settled! At least, that's what Naruto hoped. Naruto had been through so much that night that he didn't even want to try and recap it all. He just wanted to go straight to bed.

Misaki and Miyako's situation should be settled. Sakura agreed to allow them to stay at her home. She mentioned that they would stay there until Naruto and Sasuke successfully cleaned out the latter's old home; after this was done, the two could live with him. Because the house itself was very big. It was big enough for three, and they were all related anyway. But, there is one little flaw to this, Naruto mentioned that they shouldn't let Tsunade know about the two survivors. If she were to find out their real story, well, she would get extremely skeptical and possibly interrogate them harshly. Especially since she was still in a foul, bitchy mood from not having any highly alcoholic beverages to chug down after a really disgusting and tough day. Knowing her.

Naruto and Sasuke decided that they would someday be able to clean out the entire house...but knowing them, they would get distracted. Besides, trouble was obviously brewing somewhere. And Zetsu was still stalking them and everything. Oh! And they also became determined to find out more about what is in this world of "fanfiction", since they were both oh so far out of it. Naruto was out of it because he had been so much time trying to find Sasuke, then leaving for some years, then returning only to be searching for Sasuke once again. And Sasuke was out of it, mainly because he had been gone from the village for such a **freakin' long** amount of time. And, when he was with Orochimaru, he could only use him and Kabuto's computer once a week. That sucked, by the way. And then much later when he formed team Taka, he couldn't use his laptop often because they were always on the road. And...maybe also because Suigetsu kept stealing it to look at porn.

Before leaving Sakura's house, Naruto asked her what a 'lemon' was, having remembering Sasuke telling him about this 'ItaAnko lemon' fanfiction he had found. This question had caused the poor girl to choke on her sip of tea. During her choking fit, Miyako went all crazy on her and started punching the hell out of her back. ...Nobody was sure if she was trying to help her or not. Sasuke just knocked the insane survivor out cold and then helped Misaki try to save Sakura. After this little...episode, Sakura, in an embarrassed manner, went on to explain what 'lemons' were. She explained this all in terms that **both** Naruto and Sasuke would understand: "_Okay...um...well, it's just a term that pretty much means there's graphical sexual themes. You see? But they tend to be very mature to brief, and let's just say that the writer's aren't that shy about describing the sensational feelings, the erotic contact, the lust, and the oh-so intense orgasms that ensue_". After she said this, feeling a crimson blush creep up from her neck to her face from wondering if they would question how she knew what good sex felt like, Naruto merely grinned and then commented: "_I get it! So it really IS just all-out straight porn!_" Misaki rolled her eyes after hearing this and then argued: "_Naruto, you're making it sound like straight sex isn't all that satisfying. I've read some really hot fanfics with straight sex, but you are right. The guy on guy sex is actually WAY more steamy. So is the...erm...girl on girl action I've read...for __**research**__._" Oh well, at least the found about what lemons where. Now Sasuke felt extremely pathetic for not realizing that until he started reading about his own brother and that strange Anko person that he barely knew, go straight to the bed without hesitation. Damn curiosity!

Now, in the current time, it was about 9 o' Clock at night. And Sasuke had tried to get Naruto to come with him to the Uchiha compound so they could get back to cleaning the place out. However, the blonde rejected this. He said that he was far too exhausted to try and start cleaning the place. That he needed to go straight to bed or else he'd "die". Sasuke didn't want to let him have his way...and nearly put his foot down until he shifted his gaze back to Naruto just as he yawned loudly like a child and rested his head against his shoulder. His eyelids threatening to close on him. Although utterly annoyed, Sasuke realized that he couldn't work in this kind of shape. With a sigh, he reluctantly announced that they were going back to Naruto's place for rest.

In the present time, Sasuke grumbled inwardly to himself. Cursing why it suddenly had to start raining and Naruto's stupidity for locking the door before leaving. He was, at the moment, taking the key to the house and frantically trying to see through the darkness and thick rain to get the key in the lock. And it didn't help that he still was balancing a sleeping (He was also drooling now. *Facepalm*) Naruto on his shoulder with one hand.

Just a flash of lightning lit up the sky, Sasuke finally got the key in the lock and twisted it. Without NO hesitation whatsoever he let himself inside and slammed the door back with his foot.

Immediately, Sasuke stumbled through the small little halfway and arrived at the screen. He slid it open roughly and tripped inside, well not literally. Being the overly-perfect person he was, he merely caught himself just in the nick of time. It was a wonder though...considering the fact that he was totally drenched and was creating puddles of rain water on the flooring.

"Naruto, wake up." There was no response. "Naruto...? Hello! Wake up already!" To Sasuke's utter annoyance, a little drip of drool fell onto his shoulder.

This sucked. Sasuke shook his head and then walked over to the couch. He tossed Naruto off his shoulder and he landed in a rough manner on his back on the couch. But...he didn't seem to care. He just continued snoring and turned onto his side and curled up.

"...Someone's a heavy sleeper. I envy that so damn much..." Sasuke's out-loud thoughts were true. He couldn't sleep all that well. Not any more. He could as a child, but so many things have happened since then to change that entirely.

Sasuke walked over to the couch wordlessly. The only sounds were the tapping rain outside, the gusty winds, occasional lightning, and Naruto's snores and breathing. Now that he gave it some thought, he noted that the moment did feel kind of peaceful. But, as Sasuke grabbed a towel nearby and started drying out his soaked hair with it, his mind was in such a crazed state. He was trying to fully register all that had occurred that day...and night. He couldn't say that they accomplished much. But at least he could say that it was...interesting, for lack of a **better** word. He just hoped that things wouldn't get too crazy.

"Mmm...can I have another bowel? Pleeease..." Naruto muttered sleepily, shivering and tossing a little in his sleep. Sasuke removed the towel from his tousled hair and raised an eyebrow as he shifted his gaze over to his sleeping temporary-roommate. He couldn't help but wonder...just what was he dreaming about?

"_Hn...sleep well, Naruto. You do deserve it; especially since I've been working you to death and forcing you to clean out the house with me._" Sasuke immediately blinked when these thoughts crossed his mind. Did he really just...think that? WTF? Was he becoming soft?

The exhausted orange ninja's soft and very steady breathing brought Sasuke out of his thoughts. The latter decided that...maybe he could watch him in this peaceful state. It was surprisingly soothing. This was a sweet little moment that was doomed to never happen again, so he may as well enjoy seeing it. For the first time in several years, Sasuke's lips were beginning to curve a little. Into a very, very, veeeery tiny little smirk that was not twisted or cocky. But more of an alternative to the horrifying grin that would never, EVER be seen on him. But Sasuke quickly put back on an impassive, stoic expression as he leaned over a little to untie Naruto's forehead protector and put it aside. This moment called for some music-

"_**You want commitment...**_

_**Take a look into these eyes...**_

_**They burn with fire, yeah...**_

_**Until the end of time...**_

_**And I would do anything...**_

_**I'd beg, I'd steal, I'd die...**_

_**To have you in these arms tonight...**_"

Sasuke lied the forehead protector down on the coffee table and sighed. When he realized he randomly started hearing some music and singing, he blinked repeatedly and looked around in confusion.

But he saw no evidence of where it was coming from.

"_**Baby I want you...**_

_**Like the roses want the rain...**_

_**You know I need you...**_

_**Like a poet needs the pain...**_

_**I would give anything...**_

_**My blood, my love, my life...**_

_**If you were in these arms tonight...**_

_**I'd hold 'ya...**_

_**I'd need 'ya...**_

_**I'd get-**_"

"What the hell?"

Sasuke still could find no evidence of where that music was coming from. But he could **still** hear it, perhaps in the back of his mind? Well, he didn't know. But Sasuke glanced down at Naruto to see if he had heard this, but he apparently did not.

Naruto was still sound asleep, and smiling a little in it. He was sleeptalking about nonsense though: about 'Emo hotels', 'ramen', 'stalkers', and 'very delicious tea that soothed the soul'. But Sasuke somehow noticed that he looked...kind of cute like that. ...Whoa, wait, CUTE?

"Ughhh...Sasuke..." Naruto yawned loudly and rubbed his eyes tiredly. He pushed up into a sitting position and looked over at Sasuke, who was glancing down at the floor with a bewildered expression. "Sasuke? What happened? I had this strange dream that we were trapped within a really bad fanfiction: everything was going normally. I was at Ichiraku's eating some tasty ramen with Iruka-Sensei, and then that Zetsu guy showed up all of a sudden! He attacked us, but we killed him in a comic fashion. But...then...Iruka skipped out on the bill! And THEN, I noticed Kiba and Shino walking together. I called out to them, and it turned out that they were holding onto this emo-dude and asked if they could drop him off at my house for the time being! Oh, and the strangest is this way it ENDED; I got teleported back to my house, and then I entered my bedroom to see **you** performing a striptease for...nobody at all. I stared, shocked and confused as hell, and then you walked up to me with a sexy smirk and asked if I wanted to have some 'company'. And then, **Bon Jovi **songs started playing from nowhere! Oh my god, it was strange!"

Sasuke, having listened to Naruto's explanation about his strange dream, he did not gasp or gape like a regular person would definitely do. No. He stared with a weird look, complete with a raised brow. Naruto, in return, folded his hands in his lap and gave him a very serious and emotionless look.

Finally, after several seconds, they both said this one sentence perfectly in sync at the same time: "What the hell was in Sakura's tea...?"

_**Continued...?**_

_**[XXXXX]**_

_**I'm sorry about the time it took to update. But I had to totally rewrite the chapter, due to the sucky way it turned out the first...two times. -_-' Ah well, at least I think it ended decent enough. Nice and "WTF?"-ish for you all.**_

_**Don't jump to conclusions about the "continued...?" thing. XD. Just trying to be a little dramatic is all. I can say that it most certainly will be continued! (Sasuke: -.- Whhhhy?) *Winks***_

_**Here's the previously mentioned question for you:**_

_**Recently, now that my best friend is starting to recover from her *tries not to choke in a mix of fear and sadness*...injury, we've decided to collaborate together on making a story. The story is a Naruto story, and it's pretty much focusing on Naruto. But MANY other characters appear. It's a "What If...?" kind of story. About what might happen if...Naruto discovered this jutsu. Not just any jutsu.**_

_**A jutsu that actually TWISTS TIME AROUND. It turns the world upside down and screws up everything! Changing Naruto's life dramatically. He has to try and find a way to restore things back to normal. The story is based off this crazy dream I had, and Mandy really was amused by the idea when I informed her of it. We've gotten a little of it written so far.**_

_**I can tell you what's all included in the story: many pairings but the main one is eventual NaruSaku, gender-changes, life-changes, many themes, and violence for some parts. I think it will be rated T-M, it's still got a working title. But I think it would be a pretty different and interesting story to post.**_

_**IT'S UP TO YOU, WHAT DO YOU THINK I SHOULD DO? POST OR NOT? :\ (If you want to know more about this idea, just PM me and I'll explain it better)**_

_**...Well, anyway, I please give me your answer to that. ^_~ And now, here's the list of songs used in the story.**_

_**SONGS USED (THAT I DO NOT OWN):**_

**SexyBack by Justin Timberlake.**

**Born Like This by Three Days Grace.**

**In These Arms by Bon Jovi (_...I haven't heard this song in at least a year. I wrote the lyrics by memory, and only included it because I like it and to freak out Sasuke. :P_ )**

_**I'll try to update soon. Please, read and review.**_


	9. AUTHOR'S NOTE

_**Hello, readers. Ah, this isn't exactly a new chapter of 'The Many Horrors of Fanfiction!'. I just really need to tell you something important and kind of unfortunate about the story.**_

_**Well...*Sighs* I am discontinuing this story. I know it's kind of terrible to do this, but I've already made up my mind. I know I do this a lot, more than I should, sorrys...**_

_**You see, I just don't feel like continuing the fic. Absolutely NO good ideas come to mind when I try to sit down and write the next chapter. Most of the story, already, has been completely thought up on my feet so far at this point. Except when Mackenzie would help out and suggest some. Since, which I'm not hesitant to admit, she's a good writer herself.**_

_**And there's other reasons too: not only am I not feeling the story anymore and cannot get ideas, but because I have been trying to come up with other story ideas. And, of course, they seem much more tempting to write out and all.**_

_**Besides, I am temporarily in the states and a good distance from Mackenzie, whom has been my source of support to continue. And long-distance calling is a drag. And I have no time to write E-mails. And, damn, I sound so lazy now. -_-' But my point is that these are other reasons I felt the need to mention. So I don't have to have fans of the story raging about why it's canceled.**_

_**Just because I'm discontinuing this story, it isn't the end of the world (yet)! In fact, once all these unfortunate and annoying issues with the site, and posting stories, I can get back to writing more. And maybe even come up with better stories than this one.**_

_**I know I'm sounding awfully positive, but I actually don't have a lot of hope... *sweatdrop***_

_**Anyway, so this story is discontinued officially. Don't try to pressure me into writing more chapters for it and stuff, because it won't work. I've clearly made my final decision.**_

_**Pfft, besides, SasuNaru is a popular pairing around the Naruto fandom. You can find MUCH better stories portraying an iffy/confusing/assumed romantic relationship between them. MUCH better than my portrayal, I assume. Not that **_**I ****_like the pairing, of course. But it IS very fun to write about._**

_**-MidnightSakuraBlossom18 out!**_


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